Lizard’s lament

Last Thursday I went for a 5k run while wearing the Looker 02. Usually, this is not a problem, but on occasion I find the urethral insert can irritate me. It’s hard to know when I need to apply a bit of lube to it beforehand and when I don’t. I needed to this time and didn’t so I had to take it off.

Belle wanted me in the Steelheart anyway, so it was all good. Except that we couldn’t find the Steelheart. She looked in the place she keeps all the devices when they’re not in use and didn’t see it so I looked in the various spots I stash them before cleaning them and giving them back to her. No dice. I emptied drawers looking for it. Several times. I looked in places I knew it couldn’t be. It was really bugging me. She told me I put it in a sock or something (which I had zero recollection of and didn’t think was right). I stayed out all that night.

Next day, after my shower, I looked in Belle’s spot. There is was. And I’m the one who never finds things where they’re supposed to be.

Anyway, the Steelheart does something to me that none of the other devices do. It’s the real deal. It’s totally enclosed. It’s totally inescapable. It’s her favorite. My entire mindset changes subtly. In a way, it’s the most authentic of chastity experiences.

After spending the better part of three weeks in the L02, the Steelheart is a more demanding experience. It’s tighter and harder to sleep through the night in. When it clutches the erection, it’s more vice-like than either the Looker or Jail Bird. It’s just that much harder to hide in my pants. That little tube means business and doesn’t want me to forget it.

Last night, I was standing behind her in the kitchen as we made dinner. I reached around her with one arm pulling her close and put my other hand down the back of her pants. I felt the soft curve of her ass on one side of my hand and the hard curve of the device on the other as its contents surged and my knees got weak. I may have made a little moaning sound.

The Steelheart really is her device. It’s not at all mine. Knowing that makes my subby heart hum and thrum.

I got out this morning for the (currently) regular weekend activities. The penis was already hard so it did that slinky-snake-out-of-a-can trick where more came out than could possibly fit. Then I couldn’t get the A-ring off. I had to lay there and try to change the subject in my crotch just enough to give the hydraulics a bit of a break. Once done, I was able to turn my attention back to Belle.

The penis was leaking expectantly. I said something to Belle about how she always lets me out for sex on the weekends now. She said something about being a creature of habit and asked me if I’d rather not be let out. I told her before she presents the key I think about how hot it would be if she wouldn’t let me out but once the device is off I want inside her desperately. She told me she thought briefly about not letting me out this morning. The she grabbed the stiff penis and I stopped talking.

Her choice of orgasm delivery vehicle this morning was Big Blue. I got it on and again felt the odd tightness of it. How it grips the entire erection hard but simultaneously inhibits any other sensation. Belle mounted it and again made sounds she doesn’t make when it’s just me she’s fucking. She came with Blue balls-deep inside her and I never felt a thing. She told me how much she likes her new toy. I told her how happy that made me.

The first time Belle fucked Blue, she didn’t fully engage with it and came quickly. The second time, she fucked it well and good, but I didn’t get the chance to fuck her without it on until the next morning. This time, I was still hard and raring to go when she told me I could go in. And what I felt when I did took my breath away. She was so open. The big blue cock had pushed the walls of her pussy out in all dimensions in a way I never had. I could feel the penis moving through Big Blue’s shadow. She didn’t grip me as hard and I felt no “bottom” to her.

And the thought of that. That this cock that gave her so much obvious pleasure was so much bigger than me and filled her so much more than I could. That its presence in her moments before me made her feel like an entirely different woman. The memories of the little sounds she made when filled up by that cock, sounds I never heard before, and the look on her face while she was riding it, a look not quite like any I’d seen before. All of that hit me in a matter of seconds and I was as close as I could be to shooting my load right there. My brain was on fire with it. The knowing that the way bigger not-me was so satisfying to her and my lizard brain hating that and screaming about it and wishing both that Big Blue had never been bought and that I had a cock that was 7″ long and 2″ wide but feeling that I obviously did not and, all the while, the higher bunny brain totally getting off on the lizard’s torment and the idea that I was not and never would be equipped to pleasure her as well as that big blue dong.

I could barely fuck her. Every time I started a rhythm, I had to stop. I was right on the edge the whole time. Belle asked what was wrong and I told her that she felt different and how close I was. She smiled. Wondered aloud what I’d be like if she let me. One, two, three strokes and I’d be there. And I wanted it. I wanted to fill the space made by the big dick in her with my seed. My whole being was crying for the chance. But no, of course not, she said. Of course I wouldn’t come.

Shortly after, she told me I had to stop. But I didn’t want to. I wasn’t even close. I wanted to come. I wanted to try and fill her up. I wanted to mark my woman’s pussy that some other had been in. I know that’s not what had happened. I know it was actually me that fucked her with the big blue dick. But my lizard brain felt it differently. She had been violated. She needed to be reclaimed. And she wasn’t going to let me do it.

Laying next to her, grabbing and gripping my balls and the still-hard shaft, my brain actually hurt from the clash of emotion and desire and, undoubtedly, hormones and brain chemicals. I wanted back in there. I wanted to pump her full of me. But I wanted her to tell me no. To leave me wanting. To leave the lizard screaming.

FUCK, it was intense. In the best possible way, of course.

I know I’ve recently said I don’t suffer from blue balls all that much anymore. But I am right now. My groin hurts from the unreleased desire to reclaim Belle. As it should, I suppose.

12 Replies to “Lizard’s lament”

  1. After buying the gymboy version (the dude isn’t in stock, I suspect the dude is better, the gymboy adds too much length) I imagined that it would be interesting using it over the Steelworxx “Dildo with A-Ring”

  2. Hi Thumper,

    Ms. Fanny is about to order from Steelworxx and we would appreciate if you could recap (or point to) your sizing tips given my recollection of your current and past comments on “A” ring sizing from Dietmar and Co.

    This post has us leaning towards the Steelheart again as a first purchase and would like to understand any difference (other than length) between your first SH and the SHS.



    1. I started out trying some steel rings I bought at the hardware store. Thing is, the size of the ring you can tolerate depends on a few things. First, is the penis also restrained? If not, the ring will have to be bigger. If it is, then the ring can be smaller. Second, how long have you worn a device? The longer you’re in one, the smaller the ring can be to a point. There is an absolute limit to how small it can get.

      For me, the hardware ring had to be 2″. I started wearing the CB6K at 2″ and felt like the penis was going to fall off. After a while, I got to 1.75″ (45 mm). That’s what I ordered for the first Steelheart. But that was way too big. The metal ring wore differently than the plastic and the device was altogether heavier. So I went down to what I wear now: 40 mm. The Looker and Jail Bird are both about 42 mm which is a huge difference. The SH feels much more sever thanks to those two little millimeters.

      So, short story long, the size of the ring depends on how much of the erection can be achieved, what the device is made of, and how long you’d been in chastity. Brace yourself for buying a new ring (or, better yet, a second one when you get the first) because I bet you’ll need it.

      1. Thanks for the feedback Thumper.

        About to order a second ring from Mature Metal @ 1.75” (down from 1.875”). I initially used their sizing kit for determining what would wear “comfortably” and, to your point on wearing a ring without a device, this first ring is now too large after what is now going on a couple of months 24/7 wear (with a one day out a week for hygiene and grooming). Having said that, let me point out that the Queens Keep is an excellent device even with what is now a larger ring – it just hangs lower and more loosely now and the need to order a smaller ring in the future was an expected event. Mature Metal will resize the existing ring down for a very nominal fee but our thoughts are in line with yours that a second ring .125” smaller is probably the best approach. We’ll also get the existing ring taken down by 0.0625” for those time where some irritation enter the picture.

        The only drawback from Ms. Fanny’s perspective is that the device will need to be sent back to Mature Metal and with my biologic sensitivity to plastics, discovered during a trial with the PA-5000, this affordable substitute is not really an option while we’re waiting for the device to be returned.

        Which brings me to Dietmar and SteelWorxx. Ms. Fanny will purchasing a new steel device and plans on returning the Queens’ Keep when the new one arrives. I was asked to settle on two designs and then she would then pick which one she liked best. I settled on the Looker 03 and the Steelheart. I figured the PA lock on the Looker 03 could serve more than the one function shown, but the Steelheart was my favorite of the two. I also have that inescapable/untouchable itch that you experience which, for me, warms one’s inner being when it is being scratched by Ms. Fanny’s intention to make things as “for real” as is possible.

        Alas, Ms Fanny chose the Looker 03 as she likes to be able to “see her property”, but she didn’t squash any possibility of a third device somewhere in the future. Any disappointment I had was somewhat offset by being able to avoid the additional hygienic chores that would come along with the Steelheart. There appears to be little doubt about the inescapable nature of the Looker 3.

        Back on topic though, in ordering the Steelworxx device I’m thinking 42mm but would like to plan for the future as the 42mm is smaller than the planned 1.750 from Mature Metal but slightly larger than the following reference…

        In the past we had a Lori device that had a 1.625” ring. This was a number of years ago, so perhaps things and designs have changed, but it wasn’t a pleasant product experience. The “A” ring was very thin and uncomfortable and the tube was excessively thick (heavy) and there was a real problem getting the PA fixing in place once the tube was on. It was painful in a lot of directions simultaneously; at the base, at the piercing, a hassle for all getting it on. As a result that experiment didn’t last long. The 1.625” A-ring choice was made based on using 1.750” unencumbered steel cock ring which worked great for enhancing an erection but all I can remember now is that it was too tight. I’m sure that sensation was also being a function of the ring being too thin.

        40mm is smaller yet and while I wouldn’t discount that things might land there eventually I was wondering how much time elapsed before this was a work-able size for you.

        BTW From a visual aesthetics standpoint I will say I like the effect of wearing the steel devices. Aside from the definite comfort factor there is more of an elongation of “Johnson??” (we’re big, big “The Big Lebowski” fans for those who get the reference) from the weight of the device that is now becoming apparent after these couple of months. Haven’t really assessed your experience of larger testicle size but such an event would be a definite limiting factor in “A” ring sizing.

        Would also like to hear your or other people thoughts/experiences on the round vs. anatomical rings Dietmar offers. I believe you have the round?

        All the Best,


      2. “…how much time elapsed before this was a work-able size for you.”

        Um…Well, I was in the CB6K for several months. Maybe a year? It wasn’t until the Steelheart came along that I realized 40mm was the size I was.

        The tresticle thing took longer. It’s been the result of years of limited orgasm.

        “Would also like to hear your or other people thoughts/experiences on the round vs. anatomical rings Dietmar offers.”

        The Looker 02 has the anatomical ring. I like it.

        1. Thanks! Off we go then. One last question. The anatomical rings don’t need any consideration on sizing do they? That is, 42mm=42mm round or anatomical?



  3. When a post of yours is this hot, you should warn us ahead of time. As I read this, my poor little caged guy suffered something terrible!

  4. Thank you so much for that, you hit the nail on the head. I’m going to share this one with my dear girl. This subject is so very tricky to explain…

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