There are several things I need to get to blogging-wise, but I first I want to formalize the newly updated set of rules under which our D/s dynamic operates. There have been various versions of this over the years, but the most recent list has stuck and now there’s a new addition that makes them just about complete (though, of course, I don’t decide that).
- I can only come when Belle tells me to and, if she tells me to, I have to.
- I must be wearing a chastity device at all times, unless she says otherwise.
- When it’s not locked, I must never play with the penis without permission.
- I must never volunteer to her how I feel about having an orgasm and must never ask for one.
- If I have sex with someone else, I must always have a locked penis. No exceptions.
The addition is in the second rule. It used to be that I had to be locked up when she told me to be so. A couple of weeks ago, I was unlocked for a whole week during which time she assumed I was locked. When she found out I wasn’t, she was surprised and my weasely explanation was she never told me to go back in (and, of course, I didn’t bring it up). Since she prefers me when the penis is locked and, absent some extraordinary reason to be otherwise, sees no reason for me not to be, the assumption now is I will always reclock the penis as soon as possible after she lets it out for whatever reason unless she explicitly gives me permission not to.
The others are pretty straightforward. The fourth rule is written that way because sometimes I want to come and sometimes I don’t but, according to the first rule, she decides when that happens, not me. Therefore, it doesn’t really matter how I feel about coming (either pro or con) and, obviously, asking for one is out of the question. The thing that’s interesting to me about orgasm control and denial is, the longer one goes without coming, it’s often the case that one wants to go longer and actually starts to dread the idea of it. By resisting or complaining or in any way trying to influence the one who decides, one cannot truly be said to have given up control over that part of their existence. I’ve found that once I really let go of all that and thinking on how long it had been and how long it would be, etc., I was much happier. And so was she.
The last and unspoken rule is that Belle makes the rules and I live under them. Unless I fuck up miserably. That’s the next post…
Good to hear from you again. I have read you for years and read every single word of Drew’s as well. I have a question that goes along with this post, maybe. But, when you are more controlled at home, do you find yourself wanting more control outside as well? Or, put another way, do you “feel” more bisexual? (Don’t attack please). I have observed that when you are locked and happy at home, Drew is discussed and elements of that have come in. Speaking of that, I really hate you two not having anything to do with each other now. I miss the to and fro between you – LOL
There’s no connection between what happens at home and what I may or may not want outside of it, I’ve found. I mean, I am submissive and and a masochist and all that, but there’s a distinct difference between wanting that from Belle or wanting it from someone else. Gender differences, personality difference, all kinds of things go into it, I think. It’s complicated.
Bisexual isn’t what I do, it’s what I am. I feel more or less sexual as all people do, I’m sure, and my relative attraction to men and women waxes and wanes according to a schedule I have no insight into, but I never don’t feel bisexual. It’s like asking if I feel more or less right-handed.
I don’t speak of Drew here since that’s not what this blog is about. Drew speaks of Drew quite frequently, though. For whatever reason, discussing that aspect of my life too publicly ruins it for me. Sorry to disappoint.