March metrics

IMG_1958I keep saying these months are weird and they are but if this keeps up I’m going to have to find a new adjective. Belle often has a bunch of travel in the first quarter and this year I do too plus Spring Break and shared hotel rooms, etc. I find it hard remembering what normal was like.

Anyway, Belle only had seven orgasms in March and I only gave her two of those. The rest were self-administered. Part of that was due to a trip of hers over a weekend and two more weekends in hotel rooms with the kids, but she did take care of herself one morning after the kids and I left her alone. That was both slightly painful since I would have liked to give it to her but also cool that he took matters into her own hands. Regardless, her number was a bit below average.

I was allowed out of chastity three times to fuck her. The last time, about mid-month, she told me to come and I did. Well, as well as I can now. It wasn’t especially great for me. As I’ve said, my orgasms are kind of broken. I honestly can’t remember one that felt really good. They don’t feel a ton different from the leakages that happen when I fuck Belle except for the post-orgamsic feelings (and even those are less intense than they used to be).

The more observant among you might be saying, Wait a minute. He fucked her three times but only got her off twice? Yes. She got herself off one of those times since she had me come before she did. I laid there and gave her moral support, though.

In reflecting upon that orgasm and my recent funk, it seems they must be linked. My sub drop was too extreme to be from anything else. But it couldn’t have been just the hormonal release that made it happen. I haven’t dropped that much from an orgasm in a long time. I think it was less hormonal and more emotional. My orgasms are so pathetic now and really give me so little pleasure and I feel sort of resentful about that. Not that they’re that way. Not that they’re not the events they used to be. But that they happen at all.

This gets dangerously close to topping from bottom. I’m not allowed to ask for or refuse orgasm. But it’s how I’m feeling. I wish they didn’t need to happen. I feel like enough “plumbing” issues are taken care of with the occasional expression of fluid when I’m allowed to penetrate Belle. I just really, really, really don’t want to come. Really. Clearly, this is something we need to talk about.

Last night, perhaps as a preface to this line of thought, I asked Belle to leave me locked up longer. I’ve already been in for three weeks without release (since the day I came) and I feel a powerful need to stay locked up longer. It’s hard to explain. I don’t want to see the penis. I don’t want to feel pleasure through it. I only want to feel it strain and crave and be denied. I want it out of sight and out of mind as a thing separate from its containment. I feel as though this is part of the evolution I talked about a few months ago. That I feel my predominant sexual identity is “bottom,” not bisexual. And I define “bottom” as someone who only provides sexual pleasure to another. I love getting Belle off. I love feeling her orgasm course through her body. It’s a potent thing for me to experience through her. I know in my subbie heart I need to be there for her when she wants to feel a hard penis inside her. I know it’s my duty. But…it’s hard. And getting harder.

I reject the old trope that being locked up and denied for longer and longer periods makes one hornier and hornier forever. That’s simply not how it works. But I do subscribe to the idea it makes one more of what they are. It makes one more submissive or more whatever. The hormonal load one carries around is like sexual MSG enhancing all the preexisting predilections. I surmise it would be possible to back me out of this frame of mind regarding orgasm and penis use if I wasn’t locked up all the time. If I was able to pleasure myself with it and even have regular orgasms. I think that would eventually reset everything. But that’s not where we are so that’s not how I am. And in the meantime, my predilections are becoming more and more prominent. I do not have an opinion as to whether or not this is mentally healthy. I think someone from the outside would read all this and think I was in a bad place. I don’t feel that way at all. I feel like it’s all perfectly natural and in a lot of ways it just feels right. But I am left with the internal conflict of not wanting to do for Belle something she wants and needs from me. At least not right now. That’s causing me angst.

Whew, that got really serious and deep. More than I expected. Let’s talk about chastity devices and lighten the mood a bit, shall we? I primarily wore the Steelheart in March. I traveled earlier in the month wearing the Holy Trainer v2 and over Spring Break wearing the Holy Trainer v3 nano. The gap on the bottom of the HTv3 tube really pisses me off because without it that device would be spectacular. However, it’s so bad I found one of my testicles behind the ring three times over ten days. I was even able to take the device totally off and put it back on again in the shower, all the while leaving it locked. That’s simply unacceptable for a male chastity device, in my opinion.

I went back into the Steelheart as soon as we got home and it feels enormous. The HTv3 nano is a perfect size and much smaller than the Steelheart. I feel like it’s time to size down again. I’ve been chatting with a guy on Tumblr who has a new custom device from Steelworxx that’s kind of part Steelheart and part Looker with a locking PA fixing underneath. I’m going to ask Belle if I can start working with Deitmar on a new design that’s basically a Steelheart with that locking PA part, a slightly larger base ring, and a shorter and narrower tube. It would need to maintain the Steelheart look Belle prefers but I’ve definitely…er…”outgrown” is the wrong word. Undergrown? Whatever. It needs to be smaller.

Note, I am not saying the penis is shrinking due to chastity. That’s not a thing no matter how hot the idea sounds to you. It’s still the same size it was the nine plus years ago we started all this. But my preferences and tolerances definitely have changed.

Anyway, due to all the traveling, my locked up time was 99.7% of the month. I was out only 2 hours and 13 minutes, mostly to fuck but also for some cleaning. That’s one minute less than last month and 8 minutes more than January. The one-third of one percent free time average has extended for three months now and is about half the time out I was allowed out in November and December and is much lower than 2018’s year end total of 2%.

So now it’s April and it’s snowing outside. Great. More weirdness.

February Metrics

 

IMG_1359February continued the weirdness of January. Trips, illnesses, etc., conspired to keep us apart and/or make our time together non-optimal.

I was outside a chastity device three times for a total of just over two hours in February, or about three tenths of one percent of the month. I was in the Steelheart mostly (nearly 60%), but when I travelled, I used the Holy Trainer v2 rather than the v3 because I like it better. The remaining time, I was in the Halfshell.

Belle came eight times which is bang-on her average and a bit higher than January. I gave her half of those via prestidigitation and she gave herself the other half. She allowed me to come zero times in the month leaving me at zero for the year so far.

I was allowed inside her three times but issues with a reluctant erection meant only two were successful. I leaked both times I was inside her. The morning I couldn’t get it up she let me jack off for a short while which was nice. It’s been well over a year since I was allowed to do that just for the sake of doing it. I leaked a bit.

In my last post, I said, “It’s a fact that she just doesn’t think about me being locked all the time,” and Belle wanted me to know (so I’m telling you) that that’s not the case. She says she thinks about me being locked up all the time. It’s nice to hear that, of course. I think the second half of that sentence, “And there’s really nothing in her mind that should keep me from being that way,” is still accurate.

Belle’s out of town this morning, but I think this is the last time we’ll be apart over a weekend for a little while. I have more trips planned in the month, but they’re during the week. At the end of the month, we have Spring Break to California. So…still not a normal month. What were those like, again?

January metrics

IMG_0996I spent all month forgetting that January has 31 days in it, not 30. Not that it really matters, but it would be so much more convenient for everyone if months had the same number of days in them.

Anyway, Belle and I were only together about eight days this month. That led to way less penis free time and far fewer trips into the pussy but a relatively respectable number of orgasms for Belle.

She came seven times which is one less than her 2017 monthly average. Five of those she gave herself, naturally, since she was alone. It’s possible she had more since she was kind of forgetful in letting me know. I, of course, had no orgasms in January.

I was unlocked a paltry one quarter of one percent of the month. Just two hours and five minutes. The average from 2017 was 97.9%, so 99.75% is…more. Doesn’t sound like a lot, but I can feel the difference.

Since Belle was away and I could wear whatever I wanted, I was in six different devices. The Steelheart was again number one with 42% of the time but the Holy Trainer v3 nano made a good showing owing to the two work trips I made in the month. I also wore the Halfshell for about a week and micro for a few days. I even dabbled with the metal Holy Trainer (which I can confirm I still don’t like) and tried the Looker 02 for a bit before deciding it was bugging me. I was only able to fuck Belle twice, which isn’t much of a surprise.

Belle is still sick and now I’ve got it, so it’s unclear when we’ll get back into the swing of things. She has a trip to Mexico planned with her girlfriends later in the month and I’m traveling again for work (though this time I’ll probably wear the Holy Trainer v2 rather then the v3 nano). Regardless, I know she’s really wanting some attention from me and I badly need to make her come, so I sense some sick sex is in our future.

Year-end metrics

Welp, here we are at the start of a new year. That means 2017’s metrics project is in the can. Thousands of hours, a handful of chastity devices, scores of orgasms (for her) and still just the one penis.

December

IMG_0656The final month of the year was all about the Steelheart. Nearly 99% of the time I was locked, I was in the Steelheart. For the remainder of the time, the penis was left staring at the inside of the Holy Trainer v3 (for which I still have a review to write). I was unlocked for less than 1% of the month (.07% to be precise). That’s just a tad bit more than I was unlocked in November, but still hovering right around the 99% locked average Belle’s established (throwing out the oddball September). I’d chalk up the extra hour out in December vs. November to device maintenance. I gave the Steelheart a thorough cleaning and polish just before Christmas that easily could have taken an hour (vinegar soak plus buffing, etc.).

We had a house guest one weekend and no sex for those few days so I was worried Belle’s orgasm count would suffer, but the holiday break helped boost that to a respectable nine. Seven were administered by my and two she took into her own hands. She let me fuck her six times which is well above average but equal to November. Still making up for October, perhaps. I ejaculated each time I was inside her. One time resulted in a full-fledged (and authorized) orgasm because I dunno maybe she was spoiling me.

January is going to be a weird month due to her work travel and mine. I won’t be seeing her except for one mid-week night in the month after this Sunday. However, she’ll be traveling through London at one point, so…who knows what’s going to happen.

2017

IMG_0657So now for the big numbers. All tolled, the penis was secured for 8,578.28 hours out of a total possible of 8,760. That’s 97.9% of the time. Had September been a normal month, that percentage would have gone north of 99%, but it wasn’t. Two-thirds of the time the penis was free happened in September.

The Steelheart was utilized more than any other device and accounted for nearly half the time I was locked up. The Halfshell was second but was still nearly 1,000 hours behind. The remaining 18% of the locked-up time was divided between seven different devices.

Belle had 97 orgasms in 2017. That’s an orgasm ratio of about 19:1 since I was allowed five. I was pretty sure she was going to keep me to four since the rate had been a regular once per quarter but one more slipped in at the start of December.

Screenshot 2018-01-04 15.44.50Sixty-three of Belle’s orgasms came from my fingers. Twenty-five she created all on her own (I don’t track how those were brought about since that’s all about her). Five were the result of me using the vibrator on her clit and two each came from me performing oral on her and her riding the penis. Of course, it’s a crap shoot when it comes to using the penis since my trigger is highly sporadic and typically very short but I’d be very happy to go down on her more if she wanted me to.

She averaged eight orgasms a month with the highest frequency being April with 12 and the lowest being June with just four.

I was allowed inside her 46 times over the course of the year. That’s just under four times a month. Three months tied for the most frequent number with six (May, November, and December) and the least amount being zero in Locktober.

At this point, keeping track of all these things has become something of a habit. I will continue to do so in 2018 and for as long as she lets me.

 

November metrics

IMG_A38ED57DBFF7-1September was weird because I was unlocked so much, October was weird because I was only locked up, November was back to what we call normal around here. I was locked up 99.5% of the time and unlocked just over a half of one percent meaning it rounded up in my tracking app to 1%.

Most of the time, I was in the Steelheart and the rest of the time was split between the Holy Trainer v3(!) and the Halfshell. I was in the HTv2 for like a day for some reason I can’t recall but had something to do with worrying about metal detectors.

Yes, the Holy Trainer v3 has entered the mix here at Thumpermedia Global Headquarters. I am tardy at writing my review for that and hope to get around to it in the next few days.

Belle let me out to fuck her six times in November which is well over the 3.6 times averaged over the previous ten months but I expect she was making up for not getting any penis the previous month. Honestly, I felt sort of spoiled getting so much pussy. Especially since she let me have an orgasm near the beginning of the month. That was my fourth orgasm of the year.

She had eleven orgasms in the month which is the second highest number this year. Two of those she gave herself (one of those when I was present), one was from going down on her, and two happened on the same day (which is a real banner event for her). The rest were the result of prestidigitation.

Belle told me she may let me jack off for Christmas and if anything represents the spirit of Christmas more than allowing one’s husband to abuse himself for the first time in 15 months, I don’t know what it is. Gives a who new meaning to buche de Noël. More like brindille de Noël, perhaps…

October metrics

IMG_7483I guess I probably should have called this “Locktober metrics” since that little internet thing has been in control of the key all month long. When I mentioned Belle wanted to do Locktober, I said I had no idea where it came from. Since then, a follower on Tumblr sent me a link to a post on a blog called Keep Him Locked: A Wife’s Guide to Male Chastity and Cock Cages that might be the origination of the idea, though the original post only has 57 notes and I’d think something that’s become such a big deal would have more than that. In any event, I suppose it’s possible the idea came to multiple people.

So yeah, as I thought, Belle really wanted to let the penis out so I could fuck her with it, but she held steady and kept it locked up. Someone on Twitter called me out for not truly being part of Locktober since I switched devices a few times over the month and I suppose if one wants to consider the few moments of freedom experienced as the penis went from one securement to another violating the rules, that’s one’s choice, though since it was never out for more than a few moments and was never used for anything pleasurable, one could also find other, more productive ways ways to entertain one’s pedantic self and leave me out of it.

As you can see from the numbers above, and for the first time this year, the penis was locked up 100% of the time. Zero time out, zero times inside Belle, zero ruined orgasms. And, of course, zero actual orgasms. That makes that part of the metrics easy to report.

As you might recall, September was the month the penis was unsecured the most all year by a long shot. So much so that the cumulative time out jumped from about 1% through August to about 3% though September. Locktober brought that back down to about 2%.

Due to how our schedules interacted, Locktober was actually way longer than a month. The last time I was allowed into Belle was back on September 10 and the penis has been locked up continuously since September 19. So that’s 43 days of lock-up and 52 days without pleasurable usage of the meat. My last orgasm was August 26.

I’m not sure I’ve ever been locked up for so long. There were some really intense urges to be out that were their most acute in the moments right after she came. I’ve also felt some incredibly powerful and notable waves of craving freedom at some points when looking at Tumblr. I don’t crave orgasm at all, though. Just…something. Some kind of friction against the penis. Something more than the feeling of its hard confinement pushing back.

Belle came nine times in October. The month started with a bang but then life got in the way and we had to make a trip and share a hotel room with offspring and that put a damper on getting her off. One of those orgasms she gave herself. The remaining were inflicted by me using my fingers, though one was a team effort in which she used the vibrator while I fingered her. That was a particularly compelling orgasm, as I recall, and the second of the day(!).

November, of course, is NOvember but that’s a thing dealing with orgasm denial, not continuous enforced chastity, and a lot easier for her to accommodate if she chooses to do so. I’m in no hurry to come anyway and can be denied that while still giving her the occasional (if all too brief) fucking she craves.

September metrics

IMG_6950September was an odd month. The issue I ran into on my camping trip along with time I was left out near the beginning of the month for some sore spots and the issues the Metal Holy Trainer gave me combined for a relatively massive amount of unlocked time. The penis was unguarded for 17% of the month. Seventy percent of the time I’ve been unlocked in 2017 so far happened in September. While none of it was by choice, I still find it personally disappointing that it ended up that way.

The device breakdown saw the Steelheart once again getting the majority of action. The Halfshell, Looker 02, and Metal Holy Trainer divvied up about a third of the locked time.

Belle and I were also apart for three out of the five weekends in September so those numbers are weird, too. She came ten times which makes September the second-highest month for her orgasms, but half of them were at her own hand. One was unique in my tracking in that it involved both the vibrator and my fingers (and, as I recall, was an especially good one). The rest were the result of my prestidigitation.

I was allowed to fuck her just three times, the second-lowest number in a month this year. I only ejaculated twice. I had zero orgasms.

IMG_6966September is also the end of the quarter. The device breakdown shows the penis living in seven different confinements. The Steelheart took up almost half the time in those three moths while the Halfshell got nearly a third. Naturally, my unlocked time was quite high at 6% thanks to September.

Belle came 24 times in the quarter, one time fewer than the previous quarter but four more than in the first quarter. Only one of those was from riding the penis. Eight were self-administered, two were from me using the vibrator on her, and the rest were my fingers. No oral. [sadface]

I was allowed to fuck her 12 times, one of which resulted in an authorized orgasm (though it sucked). Ten included ejaculation. One was “dry.” Naturally, I didn’t jack off once. In fact, I don’t think I’ve done that in more than a year now. Not since…the incident.