Redwoods

I’m back from the woods and am happy to say I was able to keep the device on the entire time.

There was a moment, about half way through, where I forgot to lube up before bed and the nocturnal pressure caused a slightly sore spot under my left testicle. I worried it would escalate, as they sometimes do, into something that would drive me out. Every time I even considered breaking the lock’s seal, and then thought about what it would be like to come home with either the device or the opened keysafe in my hand…I just couldn’t. I wanted to show her I was committed to her challenge.

Practically, it was really only an issue in the morning, when I had to clean it, and every time I had to pee. I’d sidle off and find a slightly more remote tree or bush than most of the other guys (we don’t camp in campgrounds so even pit toilets were not an option). Cleaning was relatively easy since the shell on my truck, where I was sleeping, concealed both the vision of me in the act and the sound of the soapy water squishing around in the tube as I agitated its contents. Had I been in a tent, I would have had to have been pretty far away from everyone else since, as you’d know if you’ve spent time in one, it’s easy to hear whatever’s happening in a tent.

After swishing the tube clean, I’d lift up the flap door to the shell and dump the tray full of soapy water out the back. Nobody saw me do that, but there were at least two times I caught someone stealing a glance at the odd bulge in my pants as I sat down or got up from the camp chairs. Nothing was said.

This past camping trip, like last year’s, included The Other Woman.

For those not entirely up to speed, about two years ago I had a brief affair with TOW. I told Belle shortly afterward and that sent us along a path that eventually finds us here today. Go read the blog from the beginning for the entire story.

The irony of being in close proximity to her with me wearing such a mechanism made its original purpose as a chastity device stand out in sharp relief. Of course, I didn’t need to be wearing it for that purpose, but still.

Like last time, Belle knew she’d be there, but unlike last time, Belle had a hard time with it upon my return. We had a good talk about it and Belle cried a lot more than makes me comfortable (which, in case you’re wondering, is anything above no crying). The difference this time was someone posted pictures to Facebook of some of us there and she and I were in a few. The pictures were not damning or anything, but they removed the event and my proximity to TOW from the abstract to the actual. And it was hard for Belle. I understand.

Even more so than last time I was around TOW, I found myself very much attracted to her. I suppose the five or six weeks denied had something to do with it, but I also found that the more I was attracted to TOW the more I was enamored of Belle. It was like the one feeling fed the other. During our talk, I told Belle that. I have feelings for both of them, but they’re so different. Belle is the love of my life. I can’t imagine not being in our house, by her side, with our family. On the other hand, I have a certain affection for TOW. And I really want to fuck her. Just that. Affection and a desire for sex.

My analogy was this: Imagine a big redwood tree. Easy for me since I was just around them. Anyway, my feelings for TOW would allow that redwood’s roots to go down about three inches and then stop. With Belle, those roots go down. All the way down. I feel like I’m one with Belle. TOW notwithstanding, Belle is my mate. But, being a guy (and a fucking horny one at that), I’d be OK with three inch deep roots. For at least an afternoon or so.

We ended the talk in a good place. There was laughing and snuggling and, even though I was expressing to her my desire to have sex with someone else, I felt we moved closer emotionally. I found that, once the crying was over, each time I said I wanted to fuck TOW to Belle, it sent a signal directly to the tube’s contents plumping them out. Not with the thought of doing it, but because I was telling Belle. All that honesty was seriously turning me on.

“God,” I said at one point, getting up on all fours and enveloping her body, “I want to fuck you so bad right now.” I know, not the most romantic, but it was the hormones talking.

“There’s no way I’m letting you out of that,” she replied.

I sank back down, even harder than before.

She was emotionally spent and needed sleep. I was dog tired, too, but even as we laid there entwined, I could feel the grip of the device diligently embracing my nascent erection. I never would have thought, back in the day, that I’d be able to fall asleep with a hard on like that. But I did. And it was good.

13 thoughts on “Redwoods

  1. Or, Belle is a full gourmet meal with a fine wine, and TOW is a McBurger. Something to fill a physical need, rather than an experience you look forward to for reasons other than just hunger.

    It is interesting with all the discussion we see online every day about chastity devices, to read about one being used in its original context, as you alluded to. Coming home with it in pieces would *certainly* have not been a good idea.

    Chastity bringing people who should be together, closer together. I call that a happy ending.

  2. First, you were missed, and it is good to have you back. Second you were doing fine until you announced your desire to fuck the other woman. I hope Belle keeps you locked up for the next month so you finally loose those thoughts and think only of her. Truly at the least 30 days, maybe much longer.

  3. I’ve been cheated on before, too. From the cheatee’s perspective, not an enjoyable experience, but maybe that’s just me. I wasn’t as forgiving as Belle seemed to be. But, if I’d stayed, and my ex took an opportunity to rub the humiliation and pain in my face for a second time, extended chastity would’ve been the least of his worries. The least. You’re lucky to be with a woman who seems not to mind your reminders that you’d like to betray her again.

    The majority of us – the Sandra Bulocks of the world – would not have been so tolerant.

    1. You’ve completely misconstrued our conversation. I wasn’t “rubbing humiliation and pain in her face”, I was being honest and open about my feelings. Your shitty experience was apparently nothing like ours.

      1. I’ve actually read your blog – start to finish – several months ago. I found your overall story to be captivating and was glad to see that you and your wife reached a mutual understanding. Yeah, my experience was different. I wasn’t married to my ex. He was an early college boyfriend. But, his explanation was basically the same as yours. I was the girl he loved; she was just a friend (of mine) that he fucked.

        I left. Whether he was actually sorry – or just sorry he got caught – seemed irrelevant. My current boyfriend seems to regard honesty and trust the same way that I do. I have no problem with the reality that he’ll look and fantasize about other girls. That’s fine. That’s biology. However, just as I respect his feelings enough to keep to myself the fact that his best friend is hot (though not as hot as my guy), I’d rather not know which of my friends he’d like to fuck. That’s a sore area, and always will be.

        I have nothing against communication and honesty. They’re great. But, for me, the whole: “I want to fuck the girl I cheated on you with, even though it broke your heart the first time” would’ve crossed the line. It would’ve devastated me. While you’ve never read like a malicious person, that struck me as a callous thing to say. Like, the verbal equivalent of pouring salt on an open wound. (Although, again, that’s just me. I obviously can’t speak for your wife, nor would I presume to.)

      2. * I know you didn’t actually say “even though it broke your heart the first time,” but that was how it came across to me. Sorry if I read too much into it and misinterpreted.

        ((And pardon the double post; I meant this as addendum to my reply))

  4. First, it is great to have you back. I was looking forward hearing how it went the entire time you were gone. And good for you for making it all of the way through!

    Second, I would have to disagree with palemale….honesty is a good thing for a married couple, even if it’s hard. And especially after what has happened with TOW.

    Anywhos, I love your blog, keep it coming (lol, tehehe)!

  5. I think it’s really cool that you and Belle are able to talk about this subject so openly, messy feelings and all. That kind of communication is difficult for a lot of people. I’m glad you were willing to share it.

  6. That’s really sweet.

    I’d have to say, though, that it’s not a guy thing to want to fuck with only a little affection on the side. I think it’s human. All people are not like that – Belle and Wonderboy seem not to be. But I am. I’ve discovered, like you, that the only thing I can do about that is tell WB everything. (Because, you know, I don’t want to do anything else.)

    He knows I’m sometimes tempted but he also knows I’m bound to him, love and adore him, and would never want anything with any substance with anyone else. Since I know I will tell him everything I’m extra careful of what I do and how it seems and where it coul lead to.

    I don’t understand how Belle can stand at all you going camping (or anywhere!) with TOW. I couldn’t. But as I said, I’m the one with the spark to fuck everything up. Maybe that’s why I couldn’t trust anyone that much.

  7. Honesty is the best policy; Going away where Belle knew TOW was going to be, then coming home and *not* talking about it would probably be a disaster. Coming back and admitting a physical attraction (and the lock remaining intact) is a much better (and smarter) option.

    Being aroused by someone is an involuntary response, just like fear, hunger or pain. It can’t be helped. How you respond however, is of course voluntary, and more of a social situation. It’s not what you feel, but what you do.

  8. I’m all for honesty too, but Thumper’s past actions hurt Belle and I would expect that his current behavior and honest remarks are now causing additional pain. As a result Belle might not be feeling that she wants to have loving sex with him until the pain ebbs.

    So let him milk his prostate with a dildo, but leave him locked up a good long time. Belle deserves better.

    Should her desire arise, there is always Mr. Darcy.

  9. You’ll excuse me palemale and leslie, but I’m pretty sure neither of you were actually *in the room* when this conversation took place. Nor do you have any insight whatsoever into Belle’s state of mind, other than what I described above. So, besides the few hundred words I gave you, I’m also pretty sure you really have no idea what you’re talking about with regard to me “rubbing her face in it” or inflicting emotional pain. It’s all about the context, my friends, and you have little of it.

    Trust me when I say that my admission to her regarding my continued intrest in TOW was entirely appropriate to the conversation we were having and that I said it in a way that was as considerate to her feelings as I could have been. It’s not like I walked in the door and said, “Hi, honey! What’s for dinner? Oh, BTW, I’d really like to be fucking old what’s her name.”

    1. Well, for what it’s worth, in my mind it seems like the right thing to do. It’s even amazing in how it shows the deep level of commitment between you two. And Belle is amazing for being able to handle it like this.

      But “owning” the person you’re (in love) with is the usual metaphor people live by. Jealousy is highly overrated because otherwise you’d be naive and wouldn’t be taking care of “your goods”. Relationships are seen through the eyes of ruthless commercialism. What’s in it for me? It’s hard to see a relationship as evolving/communication, so it’s not a wonder people jump to conclusions they made in their situation. (Like me, but my situation is closer to yours, so.)

      I’m surprised that nobody’s remarked on how it’s usually the general OW who gets all the emotional talk. “My wife doesn’t understand me. I’m am so lonely. I get no sex, so it’s not so wrong to do this, is it?” And on and on. That is a disconnect. This is good. You don’t let that happen. I think it’s not that you say it (she’s the love of your life) but the act of telling that makes it true.

      And BTW, the way you write about Belle and your family leaves no room for doubt. I am always touched.

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