Squishy: Boy Trainer 2.0/Birdlocked Neo first impressions

Belle allowed me to purchase a Boy Trainer 2.0 from Mr. S Leather the other day. My thought was it could be used when travelling or any other time something non-metal or slightly less severe was necessary or preferred. Kind of a “chastity-lite” thing that would be honestly better for me than swinging free.

It arrived yesterday and Belle said in advance I could switch from the Steelheart I’ve been in since the beginning of April to the BT2. I wore it from about 5:00 PM yesterday until after my workout and shower this morning. Not nearly long enough to form a complete picture or write up a full review, but I have some observations:

  • First of all, Mr. S markets it as the Boy Trainer 2.0, but it’s actually a Birdlocked Neo. I didn’t even know such a thing existed and thought Mr. S had developed this on their own. Not so much.
  • It’s really big. Bigger than a CB6K (though seemingly not longer than a standard 6K tube). This makes it much more noticeable beneath clothing (even jeans) than the Steelheart. The A-ring (which isn’t really an A-ring since it’s all one piece) is quite wide and the whole thing sticks out more prominently than any other device I’ve worn. When sitting, it gets all squished up so you don’t see a tube outline like with a rigid device, but it does leave an idle observer with the impression that you’re packing something impressive.
  • I lost my right nut with it last night. Woke up during the usual early morning hydraulics test not because the erection was biting (it wasn’t) but because my right nut had popped out and hidden itself up inside me somewhere and was aching. All I had left in the device was a flappy pocket of scrotum. Had to take the device all the way off to get things sorted.
  • During my shower, I discovered that the device isn’t just easy to pull out from (all these devices are) but that I could remove the entire thing from my body and get it back on again while soaped up, all without unlocking it. You can’t really refer to the BT2/Neo as a “trapped-ball” device since my balls (at least) aren’t at all trapped.
  • Since there’s nothing at all adjustable about it, there’s nothing I can do to make it fit me better. The openings for my nuts are just a little too big and the tube is too long. For this reason alone, I’d recommend a CB6K for someone just starting out over the BT2/Neo. Taking the short tube option into account, the CB6K has something like 40 different fitting combinations.

When I’m back from my trip, I’ll write up something bigger, but that’s enough for now. If you’re curious to see what the BT2/Neo looks like on this rabbit, I posted a picture to Twitter.

Speaking of my trip, I’ve decided to try and stay locked the whole time I’m gone. Long time readers will know I did do this over a camping trip a few years ago, but I had significantly more privacy then. I’ll have the key with me so if it gets too difficult, I’ll have a way out.

With that, I’ll sign off for the next couple of weeks…

Bifurcated

So I had this dream. Vivid. In it, I was being fucked by a man. In fact, a man I’ve been fucked by before. There was no actual plot to the dream that I can recall. Just him fucking me. Oh, and the device. I was locked up, of course.

It’s been coming back to me lately. Usually when I’m partially asleep or just waking up. Not that I have had the dream again (as far as I can tell) but the memory of it is there. Lingering. Of just being fucked. Being a hole for some big dick to use. Not romantic. Just fucking.

The funny thing is, I still have contact with this guy. Not in person. We play iPhone word games against each other. He was not only my on-again, off-again high school kinda-boyfriend, he was the best man in my wedding to Belle. He’s one of my oldest and dearest friends and has what is in my opinion one of the world’s perfect cocks. Not super long (above average), but thick. Nice and fat.

Anyway, yeah, it’s been in my mind. I can’t get it out. He’s a long ways away so I don’t have the risk of bumping into him. That would be oddly embarrassing. I remember one time, a long time ago, I had a dream where I had sex with a woman I work with and the next day I could barely look at her. It took me a week before I could talk to her normally.

I haven’t told anyone about the being fucked dream. Well, not until now. Certainly not that I can’t let go of it (or that it won’t let go of me). I don’t know how it is for other bisexuals in monogamous hetero relationships, but my desire for being fucked waxes and wanes. I’m waxing gibbous at the moment, if I had to guess. It’s not directly related to being horny since I’m almost always horny and I am not always thinking about the buttsex.

The obsession has led me to realize I’m almost exclusively a bottom (not just in the BDSM context). When looking at images of men having sex, I’m drawn to the receiving guy. When fantasizing about sex with a man, I’m always receiving. I never fantasize about fucking a man. Back when I had actual sex with men, I didn’t really enjoy fucking them. If I’m going to be inside someone, I much prefer women (and one in particular). I don’t know why I never really thought about it before, but I’m a total bottom in every sense of the word.

Why does any of this matter? I dunno. Just that it and this NYTimes essay on bisexuality have been bouncing around in my head. When you’re bi and in a monogamous relationship, I suppose there’s always a bit of you that’s going to be frustrated. Maybe my frustrated halves are merging. Before one of you says it, yeah, I know there are lots of ways to receive the kind of fucking I’m craving from Belle, but she’s never expressed any interest in that whatsoever. So I guess it stays where it is. Bunking with the other frustrations.