Belle’s favorite

For the past several days I’ve found myself thinking more and more about the Steelheart. I had intended to wear the Halfshell for 1,000 hours minimum before even considering asking Belle to change it with another (so I could write a follow-up to its review), but had also somehow figured that wouldn’t happen until sometime in January. Imagine my surprise, then, when I discovered I’ve actually already worn it for over 1,300 hours. Once that figure was in my brain, I jonesed for the Steelheart like Augustus Gloop sucking on Wonka’s chocolate river.

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Hello again, beautiful.
I said something about my intention to ask to be put back into the Steelheart on Twitter and was asked why if the Halfshell was a better fit. It’s true, I think the Halfshell is a fantastic device. In many ways, superior to any other device I’ve worn. Very well fitted to me, so it’s fantastically comfortable. Not unlike the Steelheart, it’s totally secure. Plus, it’s quieter and makes a more natural-looking bulge under my clothes. If this were all about logic, the Halfshell would win every day of the week.

But, I’m not logical. In fact, the need to be in the Steelheart again is more emotional than sensible. For example, there’s a part of me that thinks the Halfshell is almost too easy to wear. It never gives me any reason to complain. Never pinches. Barely wakes me up. I don’t even need to lube the silly thing to wear it comfortably. Some guys will read that and line up for one, I get that. But I think there needs to be a certain level of physical discomfort with enforced chastity. Not the kind of torture that comes with a squared-off plastic A-ring or a tube filled with anti-erection spikes. But just enough to make you know you’re being kept. Truthfully, the Steelheart is probably a little too over that line (especially at 3:00 AM), but the Halfshell is clearly well before it.

There’s also the aesthetics. The Halfshell is ingenious, truly, but I find the clean, simple lines of the Steelheart to be far more attractive. I also very much appreciate how the Steelheart totally hides its contents. I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about how the Halfshell might be modified to make it enclose more of the penis and may communicate with Rigid about coming up with a cleaner, custom-designed device, but until then the Steelheart cannot be beat from an appearance standpoint, at least for me (and Belle, but I’m getting to her).

The next motivation is totally mental and distinctly personal. In a real and tangible way, I think of the Steelheart as being a part of me as much as and maybe a bit more than what it protects. I see the Steelheart and I see me (and not just in the reflection). I see the real me. Contained and controlled. Honestly, in those odd times the penis is free and I can look down and see it, it always kind of shocks me to find it like that. I never feel that way about seeing or feeling the Steelheart. The Halfshell never looked to me like something other than not the Steelheart, regardless of how much I admire it. I have an emotional connection to that hunk of steel unlike any other inatimate object save my wedding ring.

Last but certainly not least, the Steelheart is Belle’s favorite. By far. She allowed me to wear the Halfshell and never complained (maybe because it’s the one that looks most like the Steelheart of all I wear), but it wasn’t her preference. Only the Steelheart is. She’d rather see it than the penis. She feels it’s the real me as much as I do. And since she doesn’t have to wear it, the comfort issues aren’t as big a deal to her (within reason, of course — she doesn’t want me to suffer). I want her to have what she wants and I always knew while in the Halfshell that she would have rather had me in the Steelheart. That’s incredibly motivating to me.

So I’m back in it now (requisite photographic proof following the jump). Getting it on, I was reminded that the A-ring’s diameter is a millimeter or two smaller than my right testicle’s and that might not sound like a big deal, but believe me, it is. Since getting them through, I’ve had an on again, off again mild kicked-in-the-balls throb I assume is from the contents getting used to their previous, less forgiving home. I’ve also realized the Steelheart makes a noticeable clickity-clack as I walk around in sweats and no underwear. The Halfshell is totally silent in that circumstance. But whatever. I’m not looking for the least hassle and most comfort, as I said. And once the lock was turned and I was back in, I’ve felt a palpable energy emanating from my crotch. A sense of well-being seperate from the issues of comfort. It doesn’t fit as well, it makes a little more noise and is somewhat more noticeable, and will occasionally pinch…but it’s home.

And did I mention it was Belle’s favorite? Yes it is.

Continue reading “Belle’s favorite”

Mailbag

It’s that time again. MOAR MAILBAG!!!

James jammed…

I can’t help but feel foolish asking comfort-related questions to a self-described masochist but I was wondering if you could help me pinpoint another issue regarding the Holy Trainer 2, or possibly even suggest a different device? (I recently took your advice from the HT2 review comments and bought a bigger ring).

I really like my HT2 because it’s lightweight and allows me to use a urinal but I’ve found that I just can’t sleep in it due to the pain caused by night-time erections. The metal device I got from Amazon is much more tolerable in that regard. Also, I find that the HT requires more reapplications of lube throughout the day.

On paper (or calculator), everything seems to match, size-wise. The metal device’s ring is 1.75 inch and the HT ring is 45MM. The metal device’s ring is a conventional circle shape rather than anatomical or oval, so I’m basically trying to determine if the discomfort being caused by the HT ring is due to its shape or because it’s plastic.

Based on your charts, it appears that you spend the vast majority of your time in metal. Does comfort play a role in that decision?

You mentioned that the Steelheart isn’t very secure for un-pierced guys. While I don’t really need Fort Knox level security, I also don’t want something that could allow the penis to slip out all by itself.

Does the Steelheart require un-pierced guys to use the ‘stocking method’?

Do you ever experience discomfort from the flesh of the penis tip getting pushed out of the urination hole of the Steelheart? I remember you mentioned a similar problem with the square opening on the Jail Bird but can’t remember if that ever happened with the Steelheart.

Thanks!

You know what they say (well, it’s me that says it), every penis is like a special little snowflake. It’s surprising to me a circular steel ring that’s essentially the same size as the HT2 ring would be more comfortable. I’m left wondering if it’s a tube size issue rather than a ring issue. If the metal device’s tube is larger than the HT2’s and your erect penis is thicker or otherwise larger than the standard distribution. Without seeing pictures and/or being able to measure myself and/or get more data, I’d guess that.

The Steelheart is less secure in that one can pull out the back without too much trouble, but if it’s sized reasonably well nothing’s going to slip out absent intent. The diameter of the Steelheart’s tube is customizable so if you get one very close to the diameter of your flaccid penis, you may be aided by the stocking method, but I doubt you’ll need it. The plastic devices have tubes that are more oval shaped and, as such, the stocking method helps get all the way in. Again, depending on how you order your Steelheart.

I have not had any issues with the penis coming out the end of the Steelheart, but the PA fixing and PA ring would stop that from happening for me. I have felt little bits of skin extruding from the Halfshell, but not in a  way that led to discomfort.

Good luck!

Chris commanded…

You’ve mentioned before about the Looker 2 that you wish there was someway to secure it via your PA piercing, Steelworxx does offer the Looker 3 which is made to be secured by PA. The only issue I personally see with it is that the PA lock is not hollow to facilitate urination which would make a mess, but that could be fixed by getting it made so the holes can fit a Prince’s Wand of the same gauge as your piercing. Thoughts on that?

You’ve also mentioned on the Looker 2 that going back to it takes about a day or two to get completely comfortable with the insert after returning to it after a period of using other devices, what do you think of wearing a urethral plug –

(like the one offered by Steelworxx: https://steelworxx.de/Penisplug-for-all-cb-s-50p.html
Or a pear drop penis plug that more closely resembles the Looker 2’s insert (though it does not have a thru hole): http://www.steelpleasures.co.uk/webshop/penis-urethra-plugs/pear-drop-plug/ )

– while using other devices to make that change less jarring? Could possibly also prevent urine from getting trapped in the Steelheart.

Lastly, what are your thoughts on full belts? There are ones like the T-3 or Neosteel that have a cage around the penis that’s very similar to the Steelheart, which I’m sure you’ll enjoy, along with the option to attatch toys to the back panel like the Rattler. There’s someone on chastity mansion who uses the T-3 with toys and says it’s great for long term wear ( https://chastitymansion.com/forums/index.php?search/3914117/ )

Thank you for your time.

Steelwerks makes hollow urethral inserts. I’m not sure if the other metal manufacturers have the ability to drill with such precision, but it’s worth asking. Yes, a Prince’s Wand at the right length and with some kind of locking mechanism would also do the trick. Again, the best implementation of this is the stuff Steekwerks is making.

That pear drop insert is pretty hot, but the little discomfort that comes from wearing the Looker 02 in the first few days (and the infrequency at which Belle lets me wear it) doesn’t make wearing an insert all the time necessary. Also, with the Halfshell, the PA is already occupied. If you switched back and forth a lot though, I could see the appeal of what you suggest if it could be made to work.

I’d really like to try a full belt sometime. Andy over at Ruffled Sheets has reviewed the Behind Barz belt and it’s fucking hot. That’s probably the one I’d try first, though my wish list of sexy things is already pretty long.

Reader nic noticed…

Buck_Pup on Fetlife said:

“One question about a problem I’ve had with this and the cb6k.. is there any way you’ve found to avoid the irritation when fabric brushes up against the tip that’s exposed at the end of the cage? ”

I’ve had this problem with chastity devices. I have a couple of solutions. One is to use a cheap condom rolled over the outside of the device and then cut off the end tip/reservoir. You can pee without mess. Another is to use a sleeve of tubigrip that will cover the device like a cloth condom. You can use this with an open or closed end.

Ugh. But OK.

Tommy trumpeted…

Was wondering about your kids, how much are they aware of your lifestyle (chastity mainly) I saw you posted they don’t know about BF, is that still true?

As far as I know, they’re totally in the dark about both our D/s and my extracurricular activities. I think they probably pick up on the subtle obvious ways I defer to Belle (like, for instance, how when there’s an odd number of us at the table, she sits at its head), but that’s about it. There have been a handful of incidental contacts made with odd hard lumps over the years, but they don’t seem to think about it (or, at least, say anything).

Another James jumped…

 I just wanted to thank you for steering me in the right direction to the holy trainer. I was once using the CB-6000, that is until it broke. Ever since then I have been looking for a new one but I realized I did not want another CB-6000 because it was very uncomfortable while wearing. You recommended getting the holy trainer and I have been hooked ever sense. I have only been wearing it for about two weeks now and I really like it. The first thing I like about it, it is really comfortable, so comfortable in fact I forget it’s even on. I also like the fact that it doesn’t slip out like the CB-6000. With the CB-6000 I had to wear and anti-slip device to keep my cock from sliding out, or from being pulled out by me. I hated them because it cut through the skin and I could not wear them. Not so with the holy trainer. Somehow it keeps me from pulling it out allowing me to do what I’m not supposed to be doing, and that is jacking off to porn. As you see I have a porn addiction, and this is the only thing that helps. I also like the fact that it doesn’t allow your cock to slip back. This makes it easier to go to the bathroom and you don’t get urine all over the inside of your device. The CB-6000 allowed your Dick to slide back a little so your urethra wasn’t up against the tip, causing urine to go all over the insides. this is great because you don’t have to clean as often. I also like the fact that the only trainer is very stealthy, hardly noticeable under clothing. I could keep going on about all the reasons why I love the holy trainer, there is so much I like about it. Don’t want to bore you so I’m leaving this at that. All I know is is if there are any people reading this post, go get one NOW! Do not get anything else.

Agreed that the Holy Trainer is superior, disagree that porn addition is a thing. But whatever works for you!

I have one more email that asked me about how Belle became involved and interested in keeping me locked up, but that’s a longer reply than would work well here so I’ll post about it separately. In the mean time, check out the older mailbag posts and, if you have a question or feedback, let me know. I might get back to you eventually!

More metrics and more

This morning, I found myself horny. Unexpectedly since recently I haven’t been feeling especially sexy. I have a chronic issue with my foot which has essentially halted any cardio exercise for me and that’s led me to be out of what I’d consider even passable shape and it’s really impacted my mood. But this morning, I was horny. Just kind of randomly while in the shower.

When you have a penis that’s locked up a lot (and the one on me has been lately, bigly), something strange can happen even when turned on. I was there in the shower, my mind had wandered to nice and dirty places, and I could feel the energy of being hot and horny burning in my balls. I could feel the tingle of it along my perineum and even in the penis, and the flutter of it in my chest. But that’s it. No hard-on. No pressure in the tube. At most, there was a chubbing of meat, but nothing remotely like an erection.

As I moved about and the hot water ran down my body, I could feel the heaviness of the steel shifting and pulling gently on me and that made things that much hotter. Knowing I was getting turned on and feeling that firehose of need and desire beginning to turn uselessly on the hard barrier between me and satisfaction, but it wasn’t until I soaped up and was cleaning the device and its contents that a seemingly perfunctory erection finally materialized. The hot, smooth steel was implacable in both its resistance to the internal pressure and the frustrated squeezing and groping from my slippery hands.

Even if looking at Tumblr, which I was shortly after finishing the shower, erections are not guaranteed. I will get hard if a particular scalding video or image goes by, but the attempt is fleeting. Back when chastity was new to the penis, long-lasting ragers were not uncommon. Painfully tight and throbbing. But the penis knows now. It’s been trained. Getting hard is pointless. Getting hard gets it nowhere. So it barely tries.

When it’s out, it’s a totally different story. Besides getting hard from nothing more than the feeling of the penis moving around inside my pants as I walk around, its ability to stiffen up is hair-triggered. So clearly not a functional issue. It’s all internal. Instinct tempered by discipline. Though hardly an issue anymore since the necessary condition for free erections is so rare.

So anyway, I haven’t done a metrics update in a while. I’ve been tracking my time locked up since the start of year and, even though my mood’s been spotty and I’ve been a bad rabbit and not as juiced up as as I’d like, I never stopped tracking.

fullsizerender-22Going back to August, you can see some of what I think led to my unauthorized orgasms while away from Belle. Besides staying unlocked for a week at home in which she thought I was locked, I used my emergency key to let myself out while away after about 48 hours. Honestly, I’m just not very good at keeping my hands off the meat when I’m alone with it (I admit to being a weak creature in that regard) and there was a too much time in August in which that was the case.

There were two orgasms in August, both yanked out in my tent while camping and neither authorized by Belle. That led to an amendment to my rules and, as you’re about to see, a marked increase in being in a protected state.

fullsizerender-38In September, the percentage of time in a device increased to 93%. Basically, the penis was secure for all but the equivalent of two days total. I can’t actually remember why that was now, but it could have been due to some little sore spot or something. Pretty sure it was that kind of thing and not Belle feeling the need to have it out while not in use.

There was one orgasm right at the start of the month and it was also unauthorized, but it was inside Belle and an accident. That was the last one I’ve had. Nothing in the rest of the month except some healthy spurts while fucking. One time might have been pretty close, but still not a real cumshot. None of the dopey sleepy post-coming hormones.

fullsizerender-37October is when shit got real. Under the new rules, I’m expected to put the penis away after Belle’s had her fun with it as soon as possible. Usually, that means sliding the tube back over the still wet and sticky and more than slightly chubby meat, but once a month or so I’ll clean the Steelheart well and shave the bits that are hard to get to, etc. But October was different.

I was only out three times in the first two weeks and only long enough to fuck and clean the device. In the second two weeks, Belle and I were traveling with the family. We had our own room for part of that trip, but she left the key at home so I was in the whole time. Then this past weekend, I was away from her on a road trip and, obviously, not out for that. I didn’t even ask because absent a real reason (like a federal agency’s security checkpoint), the rules are pretty clear. What this means is I’m in my third week of continuous lock-up and that’s reflected in the 99% achievement.

And as I said, no orgasms in October.

fullsizerender-23For the record, this is what the year-to-date numbers look like. It’s been all Steelheart all the time since July so that device is living up to its reputation as Belle’s favorite. The Rigid Chastity Halfshell has been shipped, though, so November’s chart will have more than one shade of blue on it. Presumably.

I can’t imagine Belle will deny herself a fuck for much longer so there’s no way I’ll go a solid month in lock-up. She’s not really into arbitrary accomplishments like that, anyway. The continued lack of orgasm is also something I have no insight into. I doubt she does, either, since letting me come seems to be a game-time decision for her most of the time. I don’t really crave one, of course, and can probably go indefinitely without it, but when it happens it’s not really for me. Like letting me out to fuck, that’s mostly because she likes how it feels. Same with coming. Sometimes, a girl just likes to feel a guy shoot his load inside her. Right now, I’m the only guy she’s got, so…

HNThumper LXX: Further faux clit action

In the shower this morning and, yet again, I found myself fingering the wet ‘n soapy penis in the Steelheart like it was a clit. Like last time, I was thoroughly enjoying myself when I realized I was breaking the “no playing with it” rule. Sigh. And after just saying how Belle can trust me.

In any event, I captured the following image of my hot, forbidden, faux clit action.

Continue reading “HNThumper LXX: Further faux clit action”

HNThumper LXIX: Rubbing day

I’m going to get a massage today. This is a Good Thing™ but, as usual, I’m carrying some steel between my legs and my masseuse is not privy to that info. As a result, I have to bust open my emergency key since Belle’s in Hong Kong until next week.

This is a perennial struggle for me. Right now, today, the last thing I want is to see the penis. I’m so grooving on being locked up I’d be more likely to break the key in the lock than use it to escape, but that’s what I have to do because I’m not an asshole. I woke up this morning gripping the hard, hot steel around the remnants of my morning wood and felt that electric craving for its contents buzzing in my chest wrapped in an insulation of submissive contentment. I know I have to get out for an hour this afternoon. I know it. But the spoiled little rabbit inside me does not want to! NO! DON’T WANNA!!

[insert adorable little fuzzy foot stomp]

FullSizeRender 27Bah. Whatever. To keep the chain of custody in order, here’s a picture of the key safe with its current numbered tag along with the tag Belle left me to resecure the key before I leave the massage room when I’m done being rubbed by the adorable hipster I pay to do it. I will not unlock myself until I’m getting undressed for the rubbing and I’ll immediately relock myself before getting dressed and leaving the room. Later, I’ll post a picture of the key with it’s new number.

And yeah, I know it’s not Thursday, but if you can stand yet another fucking picture of me in the Steelheart, I have one waiting for you after the jump…

Continue reading “HNThumper LXIX: Rubbing day”