Tag: Steelheart

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Clean up

Belle’s home. Right off the bat, I’m told my permission to enjoy the njoy is over. Also, no self-inflicted nipple torture. Maybe, she says, if I do a good job on my to-do lists over the next several weeks she’ll let me go at it, but not before then.

This morning, day 31 in the tube, she let me out for about 15 minutes to clean up. Not so much me, but the device. After a couple three weeks there starts to be what looks like hard water build-up on the inside of the tube, the PA fixing, and on my PA ring. Not sure if it’s from the water (we do have hardish water) or if it’s minerals from my urine (ew), but if left unattended it can start to be abrasive. Soaking the parts for five or ten minutes in vinegar will loosen them up so they rub off easily.

This never seemed to happen in the CB6K, but that device had more and larger openings and was made of a totally different material. The Steelheart tube is entirely closed except for the hole in the end. I try my best to get extra liquid out, but I can see that the curve of the tube and the way it hangs allows anything still in there to create a small pool just above the hole. The inside of the tube is damp pretty much all the time. So far, that hasn’t been an issue, but it means hygiene in this device is of utmost importance.

The penis always looks so sad when it comes out after a long lock-up. Kind of defeated and definitely pale. I imagine it’s not unlike a prisoner coming out of a long stint in solitary confinement. This time, I noticed a few spots that looked somewhat abraded, but nothing hurt. I’ll be paying special attention to how things feel over the next few days and will probably ask Belle to let me check in again on Sunday.

While the steel was soaking, I washed up in the shower and shaved the little spots I can’t get to normally. I didn’t try to get an erection, but any kind of contact with it causes a reaction. I mean, seriously, I haven’t even seen the damned thing in a month. What do  you expect? It didn’t get totally erect, but it was past the pleasantly plump phase. I was a good boy, though, and ignored the opportunity. Not even one stroke. I put all the steel back on as soon as possible and left the key for Belle to turn.

That’s about all I have today since she was tired when she got home. I was able to sleep naked since she was there to give me permission to do so (I love to sleep that way but only do it when she says I can). I’m really only writing this because I’m trying to blog something every day this month. We’ll see how that goes…

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And I’m off…

Leaving for the cross-country camping trip today. I hate, I hate, I hate, I HATE leaving my family. I miss them, I miss the familiar routine, and I just hate saying goodbye. I know I’ll have fun on this trip, but that doesn’t stop me from getting all weepy at the last moment. Anyway…

Good news is I’ve settled right in to the Steelheart again. Seems as though whenever I’m out for a bit, like I just was, reentry is a little bumpy. I get chaffed and irritated in spots and it always seems to be in the wrong spot or pinching funny or whatever. Eventually, the skin gets used to it again and the sore spots go away. Then, through some trick of the mind, over the course of the week or so I’ve been in, the difference between the cock and the device narrows. Eventually, it feels as though the device and I are the same thing. It’s an extension of me. The physical sensation of wearing it starts to overwrite the physical memory of being free. It’s at just this moment, when the steel’s slipstreamed into my consciousness, that I start to get the idea I could wear this thing forever.

Belle very kindly shared one of her orgasms with me last night. I say “kindly” because she was pretty tired and, had it been any other night, she probably would have just gone to sleep. But she didn’t and Pink and I were allowed to get her off. I tried to make it last as long as possible without abusing her gift. There were no heroics involved, but I lingered as long as possible on her nipples and especially on the soft, wet folds of her pussy. It seems a logical extension, since I don’t have a functioning cock any more, that her sex and orgasm replace mine.

Of course, there’s no way I could know what a woman’s orgasm feels like, but I think I’m as close to knowing as any guy ever will be. I know when it’s starting to build, I can feel it start to crest, and I sense it’s surge of power as it jumps from her skin to mine. It leaves me in a very excited state, but also with a sense of accomplishment and contentedness. It’s how things should be.

Afterward, as I turned over at some point, the motion contracted some internal muscle and I felt a couple squirts of precum ooze out into the tube. I don’t seem to be making as much of that as I used to. I remember one day, about a year back or so, standing in the bathroom following an evening of similar activity and feeling it running down my leg in a long, sticky rope. I suppose it’s just another of the ways my body adjusts to the new reality. Occasionally, I can feel my prostate sitting full and juicy down under the locked cock. I’ve never been one to have wet dreams or anything, but it’s been two or three weeks since anything came out of me. I’d imagine that sooner of later it’ll take care of itself somehow.

The only real issue I’m having is in regard to sleep. It’s the same old story. She comes, falls asleep, and I start to fall asleep only to jolt back awake until the wee hours of the morning. Eventually, I get board and find myself on the internet, reading some blogs, checking out a few stories, tending the portfolio. If I’m lucky, sometime between 1:00 and 3:00 I’ll finally drift off, some sexually charged fantasy dancing in my head. I’ll be interesting to see how that goes on the trip. For most of it, I won’t have any internet and therefore only my fetid imagination to keep me company.

So, with that, I’ll take my leave for the moment. I may find my way back here sometime over the next week and a half, but there’s no telling. I already have an HNT offering lined up for tomorrow, so there’s at least that. Maybe I’ll get another in the chute for next week.

See ya!

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Soapy

In a comment to my previous post where I discussed the possibility that Belle would require me to stay locked in the device while I drove across country in a 10-day camping and hiking trip, reader Chasten_slave said:

I have gone canoeing and hiking in my device before without any issues. I have done yard work and even moved to another state while locked in. So the only thing stopping you is you.

Actually, the only thing stopping me is Belle Fille, in theory. It’s her decision. In fact, she’s already decided that that’s what’s going to happen (a decision made easier, in no small part, by another reader called Chaste’s claim that’s he’s fought fires while packing). As I laid next to her in bed this morning, full tube and biting ring both fully engaged, I thought how lovely it would have been to be able to jack off for a week and a half had she decided the other way. But, somehow, also knowing that I wasn’t going to – that she wasn’t going to allow me to – was differently, yet still just as powerfully, exciting to me.

I preparation, I’ve filled three 32 oz. Nalgene bottles with water and blue antibacterial shower gel. I can measure six fillings of my hygiene bottle from each allowing 18 cleanings – not quite two per day. I’ll also take a fourth empty bottle to accept the used liquid (to be emptied at strategic opportunities). In addition to all that, I’ll have a plastic tray, about 8 by 14 inches in size and 2 inches deep that will catch both the soapy water and clear rinse. I’m counting on the tinted windows of my truck’s shell and some strategic out-of-the-way parking to make sure my daily ablution can be performed discretely.

Seems like a lot, but my experience with the Steelheart is that it tends not to drain well and gets dirty easily. That accumulated cruft can actually irritate its contents and drive me to remove it. Now that Belle’s put the expectation on me that I’ll come home as I left, I want to make sure to remove any excuses – valid or otherwise – to make sure I don’t fail.

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A wee bit o’ nerdery

A couple of chastity nerdery items…

First, I’ve switched to a higher gauge PA ring. Not sure what gauge it is (maybe 8), but it’s way thinner than my 4ga ring. I’ve found that the lighter, thinner ring is significantly quieter in the tube than the heavier one. I primarily went to 4 ga for the looks, but I can’t see it in the tube anyway, right? The only slight downside to the higher gauge ring is that I can remove and replace the ball without tools, however that’s really a moot point since I can’t get the ring into a position where the ball is accessible anyway. I figure for those few and far between times I’m not locked up, I can always put the bigger ring back in.

Second, I have a new method for carrying around an emergency key. We’ve tried a couple of different methods in the past that usually involved the key being taped in a tamper-resistent way and carried around in my wallet, but I’ve worried about the key (a rather long and spindly thing) breaking. Also, whenever we’ve needed to use mine (since she’s lost hers a few times), it’s involved a bit of effort getting it back into tamper-resistant mode.

Yesterday, I picked up a little combination key safe. It’s light and made of plastic and uses a custom combination only Belle knows (the wire loop is for attaching it to a doorknob or something – totally useless for me so I might cut it off at some point). She wrote the combination on a piece of paper that was then wrapped in tape and stickers, etc., so that I couldn’t get into it without her knowing. The safe goes in my computer bag (which is nearly always with me) and the number goes in my wallet (and she gets to see it on demand). On the plus side, I can store the keys to both her locks in it so I know I always have the right one with me. On the minus side, in my bag isn’t quite so close as in my wallet, so there’s a better (though slight) chance I may need it one day and not have access.

In other news, we’re thinking of getting a second device. Well, fourth device actually since the Steelheart is the third after the two CB6Ks, but I don’t count the plastic anymore since Belle far prefers the look and feel of the steel and will likely never make use of the others again. In any event, this time we’re considering the Steelworxx Looker 01 (who came up with that name?). It’s an open cage style which will help with hygiene, but it’s most notable feature is an integrated hollow urethral tube. This would obviously make urinating way easier, and I presume is also a security feature since it extends past the A-ring, but I’m not sure of the practicality of wearing something like that over the long haul. It’s more expensive than the Steelheart, but I think I may be able to get it cheaper as I wouldn’t need an A-ring or lock since it uses the same types as the other Steelworxx devices. Also, with the euro trading so closely to the dollar now, there’s never been a better time.

The image from the Steelworxx site shows an incredibly short cage. They say the tube should measure the same size as the flaccid penis it’s meant to secure, but that would make it quite a bit smaller than the Steelheart tube I wear now. While the “flaccid length” of a given penis is highly variable, a reasonable measurement of mine is about 34 mm in diameter and 85 mm long. The Steelheart is 35 mm across and 105 mm long. Twenty extra millimeters in length seems like a huge difference. That’s about 6 mm narrower than the cock when erect and about 65 or so millimeters shorter. I’ve never worn any device that small with a hard-on. I’m not even sure it’s possible.

Another new thing I hope to be experimenting with soon is a solid penis plug. The idea being that one way to ruin an orgasm is to keep the ejaculate from escaping the body either by pressing a thumb down with force over the slit (which, by the way, is called the meatus – who knew?) or by pinching the shaft closed just under the head (apparently, the ejaculate gets redirected into the bladder). I’m wondering if this is a way for Belle to enjoy her cock while not having to worry if I come as a result. I’ve never tried to have an orgasm in this way so I don’t know what it’ll feel like nor have I ever used a penis plug so I’m not even sure I can get it in there. Either way, it wasn’t that expensive. As soon as we get a chance to use it, I’ll let you know.

I thought I’d mention those last two things to get the perspective of any readers who have experienced anything similar or just want to spout off with their point of view. So, you know, feel free.

UPDATE: In poking around the Steelworxx site, I noticed they now offer a Thumper-style PA fixing (though that’s not what it’s called). Cool!

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HNThumper XVII

Today’s HNThumper offering comes in two helpings. Serving one, as you can see below, is what I call the “little peek”. Imagine I’m just getting my pajama pants back on in the morning and – pop! – the silver shell of my manhood sneaks a little peek through the flannel.

Oops! Let’s button that back up, shall we?

Click the jump to see the NSFW first-person view “big peek”.

Continue reading “HNThumper XVII”

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Prisoner again

It turns out, she did fuck me. She hadn’t had her cock in such a long time and as she slid down onto it, she moaned and purred in appreciation. It felt hot on the skin of the cock – hotter than I remember. And yeah, I came. I held back as long as I could, but there wasn’t any stopping it. She felt me come and that just made her all the more enthusiastic, but she was still a ways off from her own. The head of the cock felt like it was on fire in its post-orgasmic hypersensitivity, but she fucked it anyway. Fucked it until she came and I was a panting, sweaty pile of meat beneath her.

Beforehand, she had told me she didn’t care if I came. I really hate that. “I don’t care if you come” is, like, the exact opposite position I want her to have. I can think of several things I’d have rather she said. Such as, “you can come, but not until after me,” or “you can’t come and if you do I’m locking you right now,” or “if you come I get to punch you in the nuts three times/burn your nuts with Icy Hot” – just about anything other than I don’t care if you come. That’s the worse.

Before this fucking, we had talked about “taking a break”, but couldn’t really define what exactly we’d be taking a break from. There are things she likes about our arrangement that she just doesn’t want to live without and will not easily agree to giving up, even temporarily. Personally, I wanted to come more. I wanted a period where I was allowed to come pretty much whenever I wanted. I found that, the more I came the more I wanted to come. Not withstanding anything I wrote in my last post, each orgasm seems to push away my desire to be in the device or denied in general. After nearly three months of nothing, I wanted a change of scenery. I still do think that most of the time I should live without and with as much desire for them as possible, but it’s also the case that we only appreciate the things we don’t have when we – you know – have them, at least for a little while.

But she wasn’t having any of it. She didn’t feel I was being sufficiently worshipful what with my two orgasms and being out and all. She wanted me back in. But, just like in London, for some reason she never pulled the trigger. Each day it was going to be tomorrow. I did not want to get locked up again. Even if I couldn’t come, I still liked having the option to jack off. But, even though she couldn’t bring herself to lock me up, it was very important to her. One morning last week, after she had already left for work, I locked myself back into the Steelheart.

All that day, all I could think about was what a pain in the ass it was. Heavy, bulging, pushing my nuts around (sometimes painfully). I’ve said before how it has felt like the device and its contents become one unit. How the shiny steel shell starts to feel like my natural state. Well, on that first day especially, it was very clearly two separate things. A prison and its prisoner. Unnatural and invasive. Even though I had done it willingly, I can’t say I was very happy about it.

That night, when she discovered I was in, she was very pleased. Her pleasure caused the tube to pressurize. And, from that moment on, I became more like she wanted me to be. I am a different person when I’m locked up and, as each day passed, that other person – Thumper – has come to the fore. It’s hasn’t been a complete conversion. Sometimes, I still feel myself rebelling against the steel. And my desire to have access to the cock has an edge to it that it didn’t before I came. But this is what Belle wanted, so this is how I am.

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HNThumper XVI

According to the reader survey, HNThumper is the least popular content on DT. It is true that 48% said they either love or like my HNT, but a full third answered “I can take ’em” – the only category in which that answer was the most popular – and 10 percent (double digits!) said “Feh. They’re OK”. Twelve perecent (way more than any other category) had no opinion. At least nobody said yuk.

Two words: oh well.

After the jump, you’ll find yet another artsy fartsy image of me in the Steelheart. For those uninterested, move along. For everyone else, clicky click!

Continue reading “HNThumper XVI”

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In-N-Out

I was out of the cage yesterday. I woke up feeling a stingy itchiness inside the tube that was intolerable (and very unsexy). I’ve felt something kinda like this before after being let out after an extended lock-up, but I’ve never felt anything like it while locked up (and never half as bad as this). As soon as Belle let me out, we saw that the corona of the glans was red and irritated, and afterward, I noticed a red line running up and down the sides of the shaft that traced where the PA fixing would press against it. Belle decided I needed some time out of the steel to recuperate, so there I was: Unlocked due to health and safety and feeling very strange (but ultimately OK since it was obviously necessary).

So why the red itchy unsexy stinging? My theory is that it was due to the cabin’s hot tub. We were up there over the weekend and sat in it a couple times and I, assuming the hot water soak was keeping me clean, didn’t follow my regular hygiene routine. However, the water in the tub was highly chlorinated (more so than usual) and I think by not cleaning the tube out, the chemicals eventually started to bug me. The thing about a stainless steel chastity tube with only a little round hole at its end is that, most of the time, it’s warm and moist in there. I bet it never fully dries out. So, that being the case, I basically left my little friend to stew in a chlorinated chemical bath for 48 hours. Not smart.

Last night, after only about 12 hours or so of being free, we checked it again and all the redness and irritation had gone away. I asked Belle how long she planned on leaving me out and she replied that since it was apparently all back to normal, I could go back in right then. As I said, it had only been about 12 hours (probably ten of which everything felt weird and not right). I had thought about what a nice change it was going to be feeling a real erection in the morning after spending three weeks in the tube – three weeks of stifled, stunted wannabe erections. But no dice. She was putting me back in immediately. I never once got a hard-on outside of the tube before it was back on me.

As I was reassembling it, and even though I was doing so under Belle’s observation, the cock was very small and meek looking. Almost withdrawn. The tube was enormous in comparison and seemed cavernous as I placed the flaccid little specimen back inside. It was pretty obvious neither of us was all too excited about reentering the steel so quickly.

Which, of course, leads to another little slice of Chastity Paradox. Five minutes after the little sailor was locked in the brig, I felt it pressing against the sides of the tube, plumped with blood. I really did want to stay out and feel God’s honest erection, but I also wanted what I got. Maybe this time, I should keep everything clean.

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Imminent departure

I am feeling quite seriously horny.

I only mention this because it’s been on my mind a lot today. And yesterday. Oh, and the day before that. Wait…yeah, OK, so all this week. Belle was away from Sunday morning until basically Thursday (she got home in the middle of the night Wednesday). Absence makes the heart grow whatever the saying is and, trust me, when she’s gone my heart’s not the only thing trying to grow around here. With her moderating influence gone, I tend to only get hornier and hornier until I find myself tossing and turning all night long.

Tomorrow night, the entire family leaves on an international vacation. After an eight and a half hour overnight flight, we arrive in London at about noon local time for a week’s Brady Bunch-style romp (though I’ve already warned the kids about the tiki necklace issue). Last night, I asked Belle what her plans were with regard to her cock while we were away. Obviously, she can’t take it through airport security protected by the Steelheart. She declined the idea that I dust off the CB6K since, as I’ve mentioned before, she’s way too smitten with the steel now. I expected her to leave me out for the length of the trip (since I’ve already been in for a little over three weeks), but she says she plans on letting me out tomorrow only so she can pack the Steelheart. Then, once we’re over there and settled in to our hotel, she’s locking it back up again. With the exception of when we’re actually in transit to and from, she will be maintaining control over the cock, regardless of our vacation.

As soon as she told me this, I felt an unexpected surge of affection toward her that nearly brought tears to my eyes. I pulled her in for a deep kiss. Later that night, I thanked her for it. I’m not sure exactly what I was thanking her for except that I appreciated her desire to continue my enforced chastity, even while on a family vacation. I told her that it made me feel good inside. It maintains our intimate link. Makes me feel special. Like she really cares for me. Loved.

I’m hoping for some bunny-on-Belle action tonight since it’s been nearly a week and we’ll have few opportunities for anything beyond a quiet, undercover orgasm for her once we’re all sharing a hotel room. My expectations are probably too high, but it’d be nice to send us off with a really remarkable climax.