Two birds, one stone

Responses to two commenters that I, in my fevered brain, think tie together into a unified arch.

First up, palemale said:

I am a little disappointed that you were allowed to orgasm. So many site have men claiming to be in chastity for a year and they just aren’t believable. You on the other hand seem exceedingly truthful and I was hoping that Belle would deny you an orgasm for a full year.

A year.

OK, we’ll come back to that.

Disappointed? Well, not me. Not this time. I think there’s a point up to which I want to be denied longer but after which I’m really OK with being released. This time, when she told me two months in that I was going to orgasm, I was able to shift from indefinite denial mode to really wanting to come mode very quickly. I’ve become so accustomed to being denied and, frankly, enjoy it so much that it has to be a really long time before I get there. A few weeks wouldn’t cut it. A month wouldn’t. Two months – at least this time around – was enough. Yeah, I was prepared to go longer. I would have loved if she had made me go longer. But it didn’t make much difference since I was ready.

With regard to other blogs, I can’t say of course. I think some of them are pure fantasy. I think others are truthful. The thing I’ve come to realize is each guy is unique and each guy is at a different point at the path in their orgasm denial journey so what’s long for me might not be for another guy. And, of course, being in chastity and being denied orgasm are different things. Belle seems to be treating them as one and the same (i.e., I will be locked up and denied for at least three months). Honestly, without the device, I don’t think I could be denied three months. I’d never make it. But I digress…

A year. I’ll admit that a full year is a personal goal. But, until such time Belle decides that’s going to happen, it will remain just a goal. I don’t yet know if there’s a difference between two, three, six, nine, or twelve months. And if you get to a whole year, what’s next? Indefinitely? Forever? The thought makes my heart race, I admit. But again, it’s not my decision.

Palemale went on to say:

I particularly liked your comments about the let down you feel after being allowed to orgasm. I would love to hear more about the specifics how your natural urge to have sex changes with exceeding long periods of denial, even denial of milking your prostate.

Which is related to what the next commenter, NaamPC, said:

Myself, if I had been released after two months of captivity and told I could cum, my first though would have been, “Bend over, please.” After all, you have been doing what and how much with her with so very little for yourself that by denying yourself the very first cum after your incarceration being inside of her, and letting your hand do the work, it seems to me you cheated yourself out of that experience.

I didn’t feel cheated at all. Because, and in regard to palemale’s question, I find that the longer I go the more I want come by my own hand. Or, to be more precise, the more I hope she’ll let me come that way. Of course, I want to fuck her, too, but when I dream about it (and claw at the device and writhe and grind into the mattress), more often than not I want to get a hold of it and pull an orgasm out. I also crave to be inside her, but that’s not equitable anymore to having an orgasm (that is, fucking ≠ orgasm). Those are separate urges for me now. Remember, I was denied not just orgasm for two months, I was also denied access to an important part of my body (for all but a day). When locked up, I am physically disconnected from something I’ve had easy access to for over 40 years. The urge to reconnect with myself becomes just as strong as my urge to connect with her. And, of course, I do connect with her, even when I’m locked up, since I get to make her come with my hands or my mouth or whatever. My connection to her sexual pleasure is so strong now that it’s as if it never existed before.

Long way to say, I desire not just orgasm at the end, I also desire jacking off. A lot.

With regard to palemale’s question about prostate milking, I don’t find it offers any kind of relief from the frustration of denial. It only serves to make me even more horny afterward. I enjoy it immensely while it’s happening, but that’s all. It never culminates into anything that blows off steam.

NammPC then said:

With me, arrangements would gave been made before-hand to let her have whatever time she felt she wanted for herself and after that when it’s my turn, I really am going because it’s my turn. Yourself, you think and feel what you’re going to. That’s my thought on it.

You’re assuming there is a “my turn”. Be that as it may, it’s also true that when the first opportunity to come after a really long time presents itself, the old boner’s on a hair trigger. If she wants a nice long fuck by the biocock, that’s not going to be in the cards right out of the gate. That’s what led to the idea of letting me come in the morning. Didn’t turn out this time, but I still think it’s the right strategy. When she finally did get her ride, I didn’t come and wasn’t really all that close when she did. It would have worked…if only I could have gotten it up.

5 thoughts on “Two birds, one stone

  1. reading your posts is always very very interesting although I never comment.
    but sometimes I cannot understand your readers… it’s like your orgasm is somehow belonging to them too. they have expectations about it, they have idea for you on it.
    isn’t it somehow wonderful? I am honestly honestly in awe. I can’t understand why something so deep, between you and Belle, something so strong, should be somehow their business too.
    Ok, I know, we’re writing about this, we’re commenting about this, there is indeed a reason we are here, our interest in your words.
    but I cannot think of myself thinking something like “oh that orgasm was wrong, that orgasm wasn’t deserved”… I’m amused.

    how does it feel when someone else is speaking and thinking “for you” or “instead of you” about your own orgasm? 🙂 I’m not speaking of Belle of course 😀 but of someone who’s not only reading but also applying to you his own reasoning on such a personal matter like… well… orgasm

  2. Andrea :
    reading your posts is always very very interesting although I never comment.
    but sometimes I cannot understand your readers… it’s like your orgasm is somehow belonging to them too.

    I do apologize if it seems like I have any expectations about Thumper’s personal business. I have a habit of wanting to stick my nose into things and telling somebody that things would or wouldn’t be how I would do it. I’m sorry, I’m just made that way.

    I do understand about reconnecting with yourself. But as for myself, getting things done by hand has become less of a pleasure and more of a necessary chore at this point, which is where my comment came from. Like you said, every guy is different in their own bodies and emotions.

    I know I meant to add that my wife feels a bit cheated out of her own experience when I’m going at it by myself in front of her. Another reason I’d like her to “bend over, please”.

    Again, I’m sorry if I made it seem like what you’d said was wrong, incorrect, or anything else. I just wanted to relate differences.

  3. Look, *I’m* the guy who’s decided to chronicle his sex life in this way (and to allow people in the peanut gallery to comment on the action). I didn’t see anything in the comments I quoted above that led me to think their authors were trying to be anything other than helpful or constructive.

    I am bemused more than annoyed when the occasional commenter gets so wrapped up in the narrative of the blog that they say something that suggests they’re a participant rather than just an observer. I suppose, since I allow and encourage comments, that people here are, in a sense, participants, but only just.

    1. Ha! No, I’m not sick. My fever is brought on by the all the hormones surging around my system. It’s also why I couldn’t sleep last night.

      Thanks for your concern.

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