“I don’t understand,” she said.
I said I was uncertain about being locked up in the woods for a week.
“I mean, you’ve done it before.”
That’s true. I have been more than once in the woods for a week and stayed locked up the whole time.
“Explain this to me.”
I couldn’t. Truth is, sometimes in that environment I just don’t feel like being locked up. Especially when I’m with nothing but other men. Big, straight, muggle men. The feeling evaporates. Also, the hygiene issue can be complicating. One week, I wore the Looker 02 the entire time without a shower or anything. Yuck.
“I’d be willing to let you go unlocked, but I need to know why you need to be that way.”
I couldn’t say why I needed to be unlocked. As I was struggling to make the words, the part of my brain that was thinking being locked up even when I didn’t want to be came up with a plan. The Steelheart without the PA fixing. I could pull the penis out every once in a while and wipe it down and also clean the inside of the tube. There was enough privacy for that, surely. No, it wasn’t total security, but it was locked up. And locked up was how she wanted me absent a very good reason to be otherwise. And I didn’t have a very good reason.
“Never mind,” I said.