We’re in Mexico for Christmas. Ten days away from cold and snow and sunsets that seem to begin right after lunch in exchange for warmth and walks on the beach and sunsets that happen at reasonable times and look like this:
It’s not all sombreros and sunshine, though. I came down here with a nasty cold and it got worse on the way. Kept me from diving one day and is threatening to do it again (you can’t scuba dive if your head is so congested that you can’t equalize the pressure outside your head with the pressure inside your head). I’m feeling better, though now my mother-in-law and daughter have the cold (which seems to have infiltrated the family through Belle).
Anyway, once I was starting to feel better, Belle allowed me to get her off two days in a row. The first day, I stayed in the Steelheart and the second she wanted the penis so I was out. She got carried away and decided to get on top and ride it which lasted about 48 seconds but she paused long enough for me to avoid orgasm (though it was a messy near miss). This morning, I was awake well before she was and the Steelheart was heavy and full along with my balls which felt huge and seemed to hang down far lower than usual between my legs. She started to wake up and I spooned into her, nuzzling the crowded steel tube into her ass.
“Not today,” she told me while wiggling her butt a little.
A complicated cocktail of emotions followed. Sure, I was horny. But I was also content. Because there are rules that dictate our dynamic and specifically sex. And I’ll share them with you now.
These aren’t the same as Belle’s rules for me. I think of these rules as how men locked in chastity should behave, in general. Of course, there’s no One True Way™ and everyone gets to figure this out as they go, but these are the rules I’ve made in my head and applied to my relationship and they work for me (and us, I suppose). If I taught a class on male chastity as a lifestyle, this is how I’d tell the men they should approach their new lives. As a man who’s given up control over the thing that defines his manhood. You give that up, you give up a lot of other things, too.
Thumper’s top 10 rules for the well-behaved and happy locked man
- Sex is a service for your keyholder.
- You don’t decide when and how or how often sex happens.
- You are not entitled to sex.
- You are not to have any expectation of sex.
- You are not to initiate sex other then to reinforce your availability to your keyholder to satisfy their needs and desires.
- You are not to demonstrate any emotions that indicate dissatisfaction with their decisions regarding sex.
- It is acceptable to show sexual frustration, within reason, assuming your keyholder is OK with that.
- Pleasure you experience while servicing your keyholder is secondary to theirs always.
- When your keyholder allows you to service them sexually, it is a gift.
- Always do your best, but don’t expect perfection from yourself.
- Your keyholder can situationally alter these or any rules based on their needs and desires. In other words, don’t be pedantic.
Most of these go against everything culture tells men they’re entitled to. Accepting and embracing these realities are among the hardest things I’ve ever done. But now they’re so deeply embedded in my core code, I don’t think I’d ever be capable of acting like a “normal” man again.
So, when Belle told me not today, I felt frustration and regret…but also acceptance. And contentment because I know what I am.
Whatever she wants. Always.