A little over a week ago, I was driving across country to spend a week in a tent in the woods with Muggle friends which is always an interesting experience being a permanently locked guy. I’ve written about the logistics of that on here a few times before, so I won’t get into it too much except to say I remember a time when I would wuss out and unlock a day or two in and am happy to report I now know there is no excuse to do so with a modicum of forethought and preparation.
But, on my way there, I spent a lot of time in the truck by myself watching the scenery go by and, really, only half of that scenery is very attractive, so I was pleasantly surprised to see that I was going to be able to listen in to one of Dan Savage’s Savage Love Live events. He does them on Zoom and, usually, I can’t make them due to work or whatever, but this time I was just sitting there so I jumped on. I did not expect to have any reason to say anything until all of a sudden I did.
Someone came on as asked Dan about locking a sub up. They were inexperienced in doing that and she wanted to know if it was OK to keep him locked up overnight, etc. Dan answered that keeping a penis locked up overnight could lead to damage, which, the way he explained it, sounded very scary. I was so ready to raise my hand and put in my two bits (well, more like 2,653 bits) when I hit a spot where my connectivity was crap so the Zoom call kept dropping. Drat. I wish I could have spoken up.
Then, on my trip back, I was catching up on old Savage Love podcasts that I hadn’t gotten to and someone called in to talk about a friend of theirs who — and I can hardly bring myself to type this — injected meth into their penis to make it smaller.
*cleansing breath*
The caller wanted to know if there was any way Dan knew of that her meth injecting friend could make his penis smaller without the, you know, meth injection. Dude really kinked on having a small penis, apparently, and told his friend, the caller, that the penis-shrinking properties of fucking METH INJECTIONS was why he kept going back to it.
Dan mentioned that chastity devices are a thing and some are very small (to the point of making the penis totally internal), but then also circled back to the very scary apparent danger to the penis from being locked up. I started talking to the dashboard of my truck but quickly realized that was pointless and decided then and there to write this post when I got back to a spot where I could. And here we are.
First off, I’m not going to say that the shaft of the penis won’t potentially change due to being locked up. I’ve experienced that, for sure. And, more recently, I’ve found even more changes to the shape of the contents when erect (which I thought was likely to have happened). I do not know if the changes to the erection are permanent, though they very well may be.
BUT, is this “damage?” I have no issues achieving and sustaining an erection. It’s even fit for purpose, as has recently been demonstrated. It is definitely different, but it’s still perfectly functional. I think about it as synonymous with body modifications such as piercings or tattoos. Some piercings are permanent, like the Prince Albert. My piercer told me (with the little organ in her hand and the needle about to punch though) that that kind of piercing doesn’t always close on its own like ears do. But even ear (or other) piercings that are allowed to close leave a scar. Tattoos are permanent unless one goes and has them removed through the application of lasers (or something). And that’s how I think about the changes chastity has brought to the contents.
Technically, clinically, I’m sure a doctor would say chastity has damaged the erectile tissue. But, as I said and at least for me, they are still perfectly functional. There’s not a huge curve in the shaft when hard and there’s no discomfort. It’s just different.
I also would say it took years for this change to happen. Years of being locked all day, every day (and night). Keeping a guy locked up for a night or even a week’s worth of nights has, it would seem to me, a very slim chance of making any lasting changes to his dick (assuming, I suppose, that the device is reasonably well-fitted).
I get that my situation is an edge case. Most guys don’t lock up for years at a time. Most guys have a relationship with their penises where any impact to their shape or appearance would be unwelcome. But also, chastity dabbling is just really unlikely to make any impact at all in that regard.
At this point in my life and journey through enforced denial, it makes no difference. I would be fine if Belle left me locked for the rest of my life. I fucking love how it feels to be squeezed tight in whatever device I’m locked into, not just when hard and horny, but especially in the morning when it’s as hard as it gets all day. Exchanging those sensations for a shaft that’s no longer perfect is, for me, fair. And, if a penis is locked up always and forever, what difference does it make what shape it takes when not locked up?
But, getting back to the meth injecting small penis enthusiast, unfortunately I can report that being locked up for years at a time 100% does not shrink one’s penis. The contents are essentially the same length now, when out and hard, as they were more than a decade ago before it ever saw the inside of a cage or a tube. Alas, I suppose.
Not being a doctor, I can only surmise that injecting meth into one’s penis has the potential to so much more actual damage, not only to the penis in question but the whole rest of the body and mind it’s attached to than locking a plastic or metal cage onto it instead. In fact, for me and a lot of guys, there is a great deal of mental and emotional benefit and satisfaction from being kept that way.
But I’m just one guy with one locked penis. YMMV.
OK, don’t leave us hanging here! What changes have years of chastity caused?
You should have chimed in, not trying to big you up, but you, without doubt are a world expert on chastity, their effects and chastity cages in general. No question. I am sure Dan would/should listen to anything you have to say on the subject and would be a fool not too quite frankly. But I guess he may well have been covering his own ass in case someone hurt themselves from improperly using a device.
I would have but, as I said, my connection was wonky at that point.
Meth? Injecting? Some people have already damaged their minds.
I think that chastity certainly can be done 24/7 without any damage, but it has to be in a properly fitted cage. Sadly, there are a lot of cages being sold—you’ve covered some yourself—that are of dubious quality and construction. Like that cage with the plastic urethral catheter and hard edges. And I wouldn’t expect an amateur to have a good idea of what can be done safely or not. I’m a little concerned about the popularity of “flat” cages in particular; those are probably more likely to cause the type of damage to penile tissue that Dan is warning about because by nature they squish your genitals into an unnaturally small space. Muscle tissue needs *some* room to flex and stretch properly.
You should write/tweet/etc Dan about your experience to explain that chastity can be done safely, but emphasize the importance of getting the right size and quality of cage.
I rediscovered your blog and it’s going to be great source to provide insights into chastity. My wife and I have always been open minded in the bedroom and were participants in orgasm control and denial (of me) more as a way to add some intimacy of a different nature. When our nest became empty my interest increased in chastity more and my wife finally agreed, with the understanding that she was not being cruel because I’ve been encouraging her to try to go farther. I now think she enjoys the idea of my manhood frustrated and preserved under lock and key (based on her comments). I’ll be back looking for information I’m sure.
My wife is taking a clinical approach to my orgasms starting in 2025. I actually like this tone. She plans to reduce my orgasms to one every quarter for a total of four for the year. If I beg for an orgasm during a tease session it’s expected and ok. Other times, not ok. Her orgasms have no restrictions. It might be hard for me as I’m in my 50s. She might adjust my count up or down as time progresses.
This seems eminently sensible to me. Would not be surprised if four a year eventually became two a year eventually became…
Thanks for the reply. I’ll agree to any decisions my wife might make about my orgasms. That’s because we seem to be far more intimate since this chastity and orgasm denial restart began in the early part of this past summer. This obviously agrees with the both of us if that makes any sense. My wife even noticed I spend far more time in my art shop doing my projects, which is something she encourages. Perhaps chastity plays some part in it.
thumper
I mentioned your comment to my wife after our Christmas company left. We shared a glass of wine and talked. I can’t explain why I mentioned it but my wife asked me if I truly liked to be denied and I said, “yes”. She confessed that keeping me denied gives her a huge power rush feeling and is a turn on. She said, “he may have a point since we both enjoy it.” I was absolutely turned on by what she said.
That’s what I’m talking about. When it works for both, it works!
thumper
You are right but it may be working for both of us more quickly than we thought. A discussion on New Years Eve showed us a regimented orgasm schedule this year is foolish. We’re adults and the whole denial process is hotter and kinkier when there’s spontaneity. My wife enjoys denying me, and told me “So I’m in charge everywhere now, and especially in our bedroom. I could make you a celibate if I really wanted to. Remember that. No orgasm on New Years Day either.” That was it.
🎉
thumper
My wife and I have been enjoying our tease and denial play so much we’ve been thinking back to when we were in college and dating in our senior year. One of us in particular is having too much fun denying the other. We have been enjoying a new intimacy. My energy levels are through the roof too after this last period of denial.
My wife was going to make me wait until early February for a birthday orgasm and to sort out what kinks and desires SHE want to explore. But we realized we’re not kids and waiting served no purpose except to leave me hanging. We had a great dinner and after she got up the courage and told me deep down she doesn’t want me orgasm again. It was a total surprise. She likes denying me and being the boss too. She wants to take over the final decisions. She’s basically has that already. We’re in our 50s and I will look into upgrading my device. I agreed and then we enjoyed ourselves. My wife says she will not grant another regular orgasm but knows there could be failures and wants to make adjustments as needed. She said she wouldn’t do this if I was younger and prostate health would be a concern.
That’s fantastic. Good for her! And you…
thanks thumper
I won’t trouble you with more comments unless something is posted I can weight in on. I will add that I once my wife gained confidence, we were having naughty fun, and knew she wasn’t hurting me, she clearly steered our situation pretty fast in the direction she wanted. I recently call her Delilah, respectfully, as in Samson and Delilah.