Aaaand, we’re back.

Got back from my trip early. I wasn’t sure I could take that long in the wilderness (I was an hour from the nearest highway) two weeks was too ambitious. Maybe next time.

As expected, my privacy was very limited. There were several of us sharing a remote cabin, so I didn’t even have the luxury of a tent wall. We did have one of those pop-up camp showers, but even then it was just a tall tent with a door that threatened to flap open in a stiff breeze. Except for the random morning squeeze in my sleeping bag, I left the penis alone while there. I did have two hotel nights on each end and that first night was incredible. I was as close to the edge I could possible be. There were times when the slightest touch would have set it off. My friend (the one who knows) was surprised that I could masturbate without orgasm. As if it was impossible. Fact is, that’s pretty much the only way I do it now. The best possible outcome would be to feel as I did that night. With the penis all hard and quivering and slimy with its own leakage, my balls all tight and swollen and ready to pump…but nothing else. No actual relief. In any event, my ability now to slice the space between stimulation and completion into smaller and smaller units is, when I really concentrate, pretty amazing. Ironic that being denied orgasm puts you so much more in touch with how it happens.

On the way back, though, I barely touched it. Something about getting closer to home and likely lock-up and Belle’s control made it seem less appealing. First thing I did when getting to my room was to strip down since I do so love being naked and there were no opportunities to be that way on the trip, but that didn’t lead to the orgy of self abuse I had on the first night. Sometimes, I even had a hard time keeping it up.

Upon my return, it didn’t take Belle too long to tell me she wanted the penis back in its home. She said I might get a “holiday squirt” this weekend, but not with any certainty. I locked myself up yesterday as soon as I was done with the trainer. She patted my crotch when she got home and told me I was a good boy for making myself the way she prefers me to be. She likes that she doesn’t have to tell me to lock up, only that she wants me that way, and I do it willingly. After ten days, I admit to wanting it as much as she did.

Triple play

Belle gave me the key this morning which was a bit of a shock. I didn’t think she’d let me have it until tonight for some reason. The unexpected freedom meant I could stroke the penis while tending to the porn farm (where, by the way, I found out I couldn’t queue more than 301 images at a time). There was some dribbling but nothing approaching orgasm.

Being out and totally unencumbered is an odd feeling after sporting steel for so long. I’ve said in the past how it seems to fuse to my body and become part of it as opposed to a separate object. At least, that’s how it feels when I’m in the right place and enjoying it. Being out this morning left me feeling…well, naked. As I was putting the Steelheart away, I found an old three piece triple cock ring (kind of like this one) and decided to put it on. It’s not a long term item since the ring that goes around the penis shaft is just a little too small when the penis gets stiff, but it felt better having some metal around me (even if popping my nuts through the rings caused nuclear powered winces).

Getting dressed, I decided to go commando. It’s a treat I don’t often get with the device because it needs some support. I find freeballing for too long causes irritation around the ring, but I wasn’t wearing heavy steel today so I went for it. The unexpected consequence was a riot of sensation where there’s usually very little. The cock ring makes the penis sit up and out more than it would normally and that in turn causes it come into more frequent contact with the inside of my jeans. Along with the penis’ newly hatched sensitivity after three weeks in the tube, walking around has become an invigorating activity, to say the least, and has made me thankful for my untucked shirttails.

Left to drip

I get out tomorrow. Belle’s on another trip and she told me before she left that I’d be out on Wednesday. That’ll end three weeks of being locked up. No idea if being out means I’ll get to come, though I really hope she’ll let me get her off one more time before we’re apart again. I’m leaving for a ten day trip on Saturday and will get back just before Memorial day. It’s one of my long summer camping trips and, while I have been able to do it locked before, Belle’s letting me out in this instance. If I get to come, then it’ll be about four or five weeks since the last time (I can’t remember exactly when it was). If not, it’ll be like eight weeks before the next opportunity presents itself. I assume I won’t be allowed to do so while gone.

In any event, before she left, Belle gave me access to her snatch and the activity left me feeling pretty charged up to put it mildly. After she came, I was laying against her, my leg over hers, grinding the device into her thigh and softly moaning/whining.

“That’s what I like to hear,” she said lazily.

Desperation. My nuts ached and I told her but she only said that’s how they were supposed to feel. I’m not sure the penis ever got soft before I eventually fell asleep. Then she left on her quick trip leaving me to drip. Sunday night, I tended the porn farm late into the night and had a very difficult time sleeping. Last night, not quite so bad but the penis is waking me frequently. I’m in Tumblr overload trying to load up the queue before I leave. Not sure I can get two weeks worth in there to post automatically while I’m gone, but I’m trying.

Here at the blog, things are likely to be pretty quiet for a bit. I have an HNT set up, but unless I need to post again before I leave, it’ll be almost June before I can get back to it.

All natural

Saw this on the interwebs today.

And I’m thinking…really? Cambridge scientists? If you follow the ad, it’s trying to sell you some kind of testosterone boosting supplement. Whatever.

I got all the supplement I need right here…

Yes, I am grabbing my crotch when I say that.

Further adventures at the gym

At the gym this morning, the trainer had me do tricep curls. That’s where you hold a bar connected to a cable connected to weight with both hands, keeping your forearms straight out from your waist and your elbows steady at your side and pull down to your thighs. I did it and heard…

KLANK

The bar hit the device. Lined up perfectly. Fuck. Rep number two. Be careful.

KLANK

Goddamn it! Number three.

clink

That’s better. After that, I figured out how to change my stance so my leg took the hit and not the tube. No idea if the trainer heard the noise or thought anything of it.

Later in the session, he had me doing a Superman. That’s where you lay on your stomach and pull your legs, arms and chest off the ground, holding them up and out. Like Superman flying. Anyway, new mats today. These are like thin memory foam. After the exercise, I stood up and saw a perfect impression of the Steelheart’s lock and tube pressed into the mat. Like a fucking picture. I stood on it for a few seconds, feigning a rest, until I figured my footprint had crushed the bas relief out of the foam.

It’s almost a given that, sooner or later, this dude’s going to bust me.

Reentry

Getting back into the swing of things now. It takes a bit of adjustment having Belle back. I’m not able to stay up all night abusing myself and looking at porn. I’m once again locked up beyond my control, not because I want to be that way but because she wants it. She did allow me to get her off on Saturday, but I’m wanting more. Last night was spent nuzzling into her, hard penis straining against the steel. I wanted her. In no particular way. Just wanted. Her breasts, her snatch, her everything. I wanted to feel the strain of my desire against the device and at the same time wanted to thrust it into her. I wanted to eat her and lick her and fuck her, but she said wanting rather than getting was good for me. She said she had no idea how long I was going to be locked up and she wouldn’t tell me even if she did.

She fell asleep stroking the hair in my armpit. I fell asleep somewhat later, still thrumming and happy to have her there with me.

Locked plugged pinched

As I mentioned, I’ve locked myself up in anticipation of Belle’s return next week from her international business trip which will also mark the return of our D/s dynamic. As I also mentioned, I’m pretty fucking worked up. It’s been something like a week and a half since my last orgasm and while normally this would be a highly frothy period anyway, the fact that my body got used to not carrying any excess hormones for a while can’t be helping.

Last night, after all the offspring where sequestered for the evening, I had every intention of going to bed as I was tired. The intentions evaporated, though, when I spent a few minutes curating The Portfolio (and it’s little brother). Tumblr led to Literotica and it’s wonderfully implemented story tags where you can mix and match perversions to your heart’s content. Many words were read. That led me to bring out the njoy Pure Plug 2.o and my six pinchy things.

Of the pinchy things, I chose the two most vicious: the alligator clips and the pervertable Old Navy clips. It was one of those nights where there was no such thing as too much pain and suffering. Starting with the alligators affixed to the very end of my nips, I graduated to the badass Old Navy clips and then to both. At the same time. In fact, the gators and two different sets of the Old Navy clips. That’s three clips simultaneously chewing on my nipples. Nipples are funny old things in that they’re so incredibly sensitive yet can stand up to a withering amount of abuse. In general, my nipples are a little larger and bit chubbier than average so there’s plenty of surface upon which to affix nasty biting things. The pain was intense and today they’re puffier than usual and hurt even when I walk (but still pink and cheerful looking). Even so, I’m constantly reaching unto my hoody when people aren’t looking and pinching them through my t-shirt. I’m quite positive I’ll be ruining them again tonight.

As for the plug, I don’t recall ever mentioning the Pure Plug 2.0 here before. It’s a wonderfully dense slug of steel with a circumference of almost 14 cm (which sounds a lot worse than it is). I adore this thing. I used it last night because I wanted to feel stuffed with the 1 1/3 pounds of metal and didn’t have the energy for anything more strenuous. Getting the thing in is harder than even Stryker’s Beast since its 2″ diameter, while shaped for insertion, is totally unforgiving. A dildo has some give. Steel does not. There’s always a half-second of feeling like I’m about to rip open as it goes in, but once it settles into place I quite often drip from the pressure on my prostate.

So there I was, dick locked, ass plugged and nipples fiercely pinched while I read all sorts of perverted things on the internet. I was out of my mind on the hormones but eventually found myself unable to keep my eyes open and I had to stop. I wistfully unclamped the throbbing pink circles of tender flesh and put their tormentors back in a black velveteen bag but decided to leave the Pure Plug where it was.

As even a casual reader of this blog knows, I really like it up the ass. I love the sensation of being penetrated and stuffed and especially like how the heavy steel of the Pure Plug shifts around inside me as I move. If I could, I’d want to be plugged all the time (sometimes) so I indulged my fantasy a bit last night. I did fall asleep even with the distraction. I woke up a few times and was reminded of the invader immediately. Reaching around and feeling where the hot steel disappeared into me brought me out of my sleep quickly, but I managed to leave it in place all night. The only downside of the Pure Plug is it’s base which has an oval ring (presumably to make handling easier) with somewhat sharp edges. After a few hours, those edges start to bite into the cheeks pressing against them.

Belle doesn’t get home for another week yet. I really want her. I want to press my face into her snatch and feel her come against my mouth. I want to smell her and suck on her tits and feel her bite my neck and squeeze my nuts. While I wait for that, though, I’ll get by with the self-abuse.

Rising tide

Where were we? Oh, right. On a break.

It’s been one month since I wrote that. One month of not wearing a chastity device and one month of essentially coming when I want. Yes, the deal was that I wasn’t supposed to come without Belle, and it started well, but I failed there. Easy access to the penis and our hiatus in other action along with her distraction by work gave my reptile brain the momentum it needed to make me think for a second or two longer during masturbation. That’s all it takes.

“Wait!”

“What?”

SPURT

I have no idea how many times I came in that month. Not as often as I would have under “normal” circumstances, but perhaps more than I have in the previous six months combined. That is, until about ten days ago. I hadn’t come in a bit and was feeling pretty horny. Instead of acting on that desire, I let it sit and grow. Then Belle told me that as soon as she gets back from the long business trip she’s currently on, I was going back in. Break over. That made me want to try to start the break in the proper state of mind. So I haven’t come now for about a week and a half. Hardly any time at all, really, but I’m feeling it.

A few days ago, after Belle had left, I was alone in the house with time on my hands. A bad combination for those who haven’t come and are trying not to. I ended up on all fours abusing myself with Mr. Stryker and his lesser cousins, locking double cocking ring in place, chain between the nipple clamps swinging. Of course, cock ring or no, I had access to the penis and worked it hard. I put some of the numbing cream on before hand but not so much that I couldn’t feel a thing. In any event, I was well and truly fucked (literally) and super horny (as you can imagine). I didn’t come, but I jerked it raw and wanted more. A lot more. There was a tickle in the back of my brain saying the break was still on. There would be few chances to come. I should take advantage of it.

The thing is, though, while it’s really hard to keep my hands off of it when I’m this turned on, I knew how I’d feel after the orgasm. Belle’s warning me of the end of the break brought me back into line and while a very rudimentary part of my brain wanted the orgasm, everything higher up didn’t. That’s what orgasm denial does to men. It sets up an internal war over the penis and orgasm. Higher brain functions at battle with lower ones and constantly the need to feel one’s hard member in hand. The higher forces had regained the advantage, though. I put the device back on.

I know where the key is, of course. Belle doesn’t have it, I do. I’m purposefully denying myself what I could have because I honestly can’t trust myself. If I take it off, I may give myself an orgasm. An orgasm I don’t want but desperately need. The key is in my bathroom drawer. I saw it last night and I caught myself fingering it before I even thought to touch it. Maybe just a short jerk, I thought. I’d even leave the ring on. It’s not like I’d really be taking it off…right?

So that’s where I am. Aching balls and a tight early morning throbbing between my legs. Pretty much right where I want to be.