Zoning

I am, right now, this second, totally in the zone. I’m feeling controlled, horny, and submissive. Belle asked me why and I told her I had no idea. After some thinking it over, I actually have a few thoughts…

  • I haven’t had a real orgasm in five weeks. I know, I had a kind of a thing a couple of weeks ago, but I’m not counting that. There was an emission, but no orgasm. An actual toe curling pleasure squirt has not come out of me since January (though the last time she allowed me to come was on Valentine’s Day). It may not be en vougue to admit it, but being denied and encased can contribute to my subbie vibe.
  • Belle’s exerting her control pretty well right now. Bossing me around, expecting me to serve and obey, etc. She just got her period which means she’s really not feeling like being pawed all over, but last night I was pretty much begging her to be let out so I could play with the cock and she told me no. She did say, though, that if I managed to finish all the laundry today she’d let me out for a little edging tonight. It feels good to be managed. Powerless.
  • Belle’s totally on board with the 100 days thing. She won’t give me permission to come until a hundred days from the 1st of March. I was already a few weeks into being denied when she picked that date as the start of the 100 days, so technically it’ll be more than that when, on June 8th, I’ll have permission. We’ll see if I can make it that long. In any event, the challenge is invigorating.
  • All that, plus she obviously enjoys leaving me in the device continuously. She strokes its surface and comments how smooth it is, tells me how sexy and sleek it looks – better than what it contains. And she’s not just saying that for my benefit. She means it. I am now essentially a permanently chastised man, only let out when she wants to use me, and that’s fucking awesome.

*happy*

One thought on “Zoning

  1. Hi Thumper,

    Sounds like you are having a great time at the moment, which is good to hear!

    I am interested in your comment that : “It feels good to be managed. Powerless.”

    Can you explain whether being managed and powerless make you feel:

    1. safe, cared for and liberated – someone else (who you trust) is responsible for making the decisions, you don’t have to worry, you can just relax and let go; or

    2. thrilled and excited – you have no power, anything could happen and you can’t control it (although you can etc ect); or

    3. neither of the above, but a totally different feeling?

    I ask because I am very risk averse (some might say a control freak!)and the idea of powerlessness frightens me, rather than comforts or excites me. So I am interested in whether you have any more insight into how why this feels so good for you.

    Thanks.

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