Chastity Nerdery – Page 7 – Denying Thumper

September 11, 2017

Metal Holy Trainer review

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I’ve said it before, the Holy Trainer v2 is just about the best male chastity device design you’re going to find. It’s affordable, it’s comfortable (most of the time, wink wink), and it’s easy to put on. So when I started seeing what appeared to be metal versions of it in the, ahem, erotic pictorials I sometimes peruse, I was intrigued. If you’ve read my site for any period of time, you know that I kinda have a thing for steel.

In checking the Holy Trainer website, I found a metal version of their product was not listed. I asked them if they made one, and they said any metal device based on their design was not made by them. They’re all knock-offs. So then I looked on Amazon and couldn’t find any (though I feel I’ve seen them in the past). Failing there, I turned to Google and the first place it sent me was to House of Denial. From their About Us page:

Our aim is to offer high quality products at affordable prices with discreet worldwide delivery. Many chastity belts that we’ve seen on the market are incredibly expensive and we don’t think that’s particularly fair, so we do our best to offer the best devices for the lowest prices. All of our products are thoroughly tested to ensure that you receive a safe, quality item that you’re happy to use on a regular basis.

I’ll say right up front, I’m not going to be especially kind to House of Denial in this review. Bottom line, the Metal Holy Trainer they sell — which is their product — simply cannot have been tested at all, let alone thoroughly. At least not on anyone who wears a device for more than an evening’s entertainment. I’m sure some will take issue with me finding their product and their assertion of offering high quality and thoroughly tested products inaccurate and misleading since they’re apparently a small operator and how mean, etc. But their business name literally has denial in it. I would expect a site that sells nothing but male chastity devices to be more honest in their statements and more discriminating in their product selection.

IMG_D9C4C70C5AC1-1

But I get ahead of myself. As usual, I will assess the Metal Holy Trainer on the five basic attributes I use to judge chastity devices: Cost, aesthetic, fit/comfort, security, hygiene, and stealth.

Cost

House of Denial sells the Metal Holy Trainer for £79.99. With shipping, it came to £93.98. As of this writing, that’s about $124. Pretty cheap for a metal device, but in keeping with the extraordinary low prices of all their devices and much more than most of their other metal devices. Unlike Steelworxx, House of Denial appears not to refund VAT to American buyers.

IMG_7AAC48BCDE66-1 As I said, House of Denial sells nothing but what appears to be knock-offs of other manufacturer’s designs. They have a version of the CB-6000 they call the HoD600, but the Holy Trainer-type devices are all called “Holy Trainer.” They even have the HTv1 design, both in plastic and metal, along with the v2. I guess I don’t take issue with the selling of knock-offs if the knock-off is plainly labeled as such (aka, the DoD600), but not changing the name of their Holy Trainer clones shades closer to fraudulent behavior. Yes, a cautious buyer should intuit they were knock offs because the prices are simply too low, but that’s not really an excuse. They’re doing all they can to make these products look authentic.

IMG_9434D4AE8BC9-1 The illusion of authenticity is extended to the unboxing of the product when it arrives in a Holy Trainer package. This is where they cross the line from knock off to forgery. This appears to be a genuine Holy Trainer and they want you to think that, but it’s not. It’s like buying a fake Rolex, essentially.

The other issue I found unsettling is they don’t say what the device is made of. It’s described as steel but what grade? Is it surgical quality? No idea. But why not say? Most competitors do. I couldn’t find mention of the grade of steel used in any of their products. This could be an issue for those with allergies or sensitivities.

But yeah, it’s pretty cheap. If cost is a primary drive for you, you’re in luck in that regard.

Aesthetic

IMG_D9C4C70C5AC1-1 Flat out, this thing is gorgeous. The cleanliness and efficiency of the Holy Trainer v2 design looks even better in high gloss metal. I was and continue to be totally in love with how this device looks on the outside. In my opinion, the Holy Trainer v2 is like the Porsche of male chastity device designs: timeless and near perfect. Bonus, it’s a lot more affordable, relatively, than a Porsche.

Fit/Comfort

Here we go.

IMG_B3C7B4EEA63D-1 First, fit. The metal HT2 tube is just a bit smaller than the plastic version in a way I found really appealing. That’s somewhat visible in the image to the left. It may be just a little shorter or it may only appear that way due to the plastic being thicker, but it is definitely a bit narrower. The internal circumference is smaller than that of the small-tubed plastic HT2.

That leads to what I found to be a really satisfying tightness while the penis was attempting an erection. Distractingly so. The one morning I had it on during the early morning tumescence, I had trouble going back to sleep simply because it felt so hot to me. Note, the penis is not especially girthy and I’m a known fetishizer of penis constriction, so YMMV. I’m thinking dicks of better than average girth could have problems.

The A-ring is identical in all ways to the plastic version, including being very comfortable. They offer two sizes, 38mm and 45mm. I chose the 45mm. While the penis was compressed more than usual, there was no associated excessive tightness around the scrotum. No testicular pain at all. It was essentially a perfect fit in that regard and exactly what I like in a chastity device: A tube that’s tight without a ring that’s crushing my balls.

The device is heavy. Far heavier than any other I’ve worn. But I really liked that, too. I like the feeling of heft between my legs like that and the sensation of being pulled around as I shift in bed.

IMG_AA6707C5A2FA-1 OK, now comfort. Based on all I’ve said so far, what’s the problem? Sounds awesome. Sign me up, right? Wrong.

I was able to wear the Metal Holy Trainer for 27 hours before the rough, poorly finished interior had abraded the corona of the penis’ glans. This became apparent the second night I tried to sleep when, after I urinated for the last time, I found an intense burning emanating from the device’s interior. Belle was already fast asleep and the pain was unbearable so I was left to break open my emergency key and take the device off.

I believe my pain was caused by an approximately 4 mile walk I had gone on earlier in the day. It wasn’t until I was laying down and the inevitable remaining urine was able to make contact with my abrasions that I knew they were there. Then, OMG holy shit did that hurt. In my opinion, this would have happened anyway but would have taken two or three days of normal movement before the same issues manifested. Perhaps if one is a total sloth and engages in zero physical activities, the rough and poorly finished interior would not present a problem. But I doubt it.

Bottom line, this “high quality” and “thoroughly tested” device is entirely unsuited to daily wear. It’s not for someone who has made enforced chastity part of their lifestyle and thinks of the device locked onto them as part of their body. Which is really tragic since it’s so beautiful on the outside. You could wear it for a play session or for a night, but not beyond. Unless you like the feeling of a burning penis that’s so torn up you almost can’t sleep even without the device on because of the irritating sensation.

Security

The Metal Holy Trainer is no more secure than any other trapped-ball device without a PA fixing. The weight of it makes it feel less secure since it pulls down and, if poorly fitted, could leave much of the penis exposed above the ring. If you need high security, this is not the device for you. House of Denial’s assertion that “you certainly won’t be able to get out of this device” is bunk.

Hygiene

Pretty much the same as the plastic Holy Trainer v2. It’s easy to wash and drains satisfactorily. No pluses or minuses in this regard.

Stealth

I found the Metal Holy Trainer to be very stealthy. Like its plastic inspiration, it sits in a way that is more nestled into the scrotum which leads to a less-pronounced profile. The tube is reasonably small so it was very hard to see in a pair of jeans. Less noticeable than the Steelheart for sure.

The two pieces of metal don’t fit especially tight so there was a tiny bit of occasional clanking when not contained in briefs, but not so bad. All in all, this is a very stealthy device.

Bottom line

Don’t buy this device. It’s unfinished and can injure you if worn for longer than one night. Sure, it’s cheap and beautiful, but it’s also totally unsuited for the kind of chastity most of those reading this blog are into. If I had a business selling nothing but chastity devices, even of the “budget” variety, I would definitely not sell this as-is. The poor quality of the Metal Holy Trainer leaves me suspicious of all the other products House of Denial sells.

September 11, 2017

August metrics

Wow, I almost forgot to post the August numbers.

August looked liked July…and June…and, really, all the months for the past many months. The penis was outside a device 0.6% of the month. The remaining 99.4% it was locked into the Halfshell (42%), Steelheart (37%) and, for the first time (I believe) since I’ve been tracking, the Mature Metal Jail Bird (20%). It wasn’t at the behest of Belle as we’re still playing along like I get to choose what I wear as long as I’m wearing something. It’s not my favorite device, but the change of pace of seeing the penis behind bars rather than disappeared down a steel tube was fun for a while.

Belle came eight times in the month, once by herself since we were still apart for the first week or so, and once with me driving the vibrator. The other times were from my prestidigitation. I “came” once on the 26th. I put that in quotes since it didn’t actually feel too much like an orgasm. While I was fucking her, Belle told me I could so I didn’t slow down or stop when I felt the urge building and I kept fucking right though the ejaculation but I never felt the kick of hormones and had a very, very mild post-orgasmic experience. The penis didn’t even feel especially sensitive after. It was entirely anti-climatic. Like it built to a 6.8 on the Richter Scale and then died. Since it happens so infrequently (that was number three on the year), the sample size is small and I can’t say if this is some kind of new normal or just a fluke. I have not been given the opportunity to come again since then.

There’s a part of me that thinks it would be kinda hot if my ability to orgasm properly is broken. But I don’t know. I’ve been allowed to fuck her three times since and felt the same build-up but avoided getting closer enough. The true test will be if she lets me go again.

Speaking of fucking her, I was inside her five times in August and ejaculated each time.

September is going to look different than any of the months since last September. I had to stay out of the Steelheart overnight around Labor Day because the penis was irritated by it. Odd as the Steelheart hasn’t done that in some time, but a hot spot popped up on the head and it was painful. I was out for another night after wear-testing a steel knock-off of the Holy Trainer 2. Spoilers: It’s not good. Ripped the penis up good after just a day so I had to come out for another night but was able to wear the Halfshell the next day as it keeps the penis in a fixed position and keeps it from rubbing against the shell. So two of the three nights I’ve slept without being locked up in the past year happened within a week of each other.

Also, I’m going camping this week for seven days (and yes, for those keeping score, this is the same kind of trip that led to last year’s incidents of unauthorized orgasm and the rule that I must always be locked unless Belle explicitly says I can be otherwise). Not sure how that’s going to work out with a device. I start with a healthy ambition but it’s primitive camping among muggles so facilities to keep things clean are nonexistent. Also, I’ll be among men only and I find my ability to maintain the right headspace to be locked pretty much evaporates when I’m not around estrogen. Nothing kills a buzz like a bunch of straight guys. Still puzzling over that one.

August 30, 2017

Mailbag (again)

One more from reader K:

I’m a 21 years old college student, who grew some interest in chastity. I would like to ask about your Steelheart device (mostly) as I’m planning on getting one in the future. I had a device before (only one): it was the spiral stainless steel device from uberkinky.com. I wore it for daily 3-4 hours with no real discomfort however my left testicle got varicocele (enlarged veins), so it might got pressured (a big problem was that the tube pressed against the testicles and they got trapped between the tube and the ring). In the end I got an inflammation of the Epididymis (which was, or was not because of the device, I can’t really tell). Got antibiotics and now I’m fine (it was 2 months ago).

Now, I have made a decision with my girlfriend that we retry the whole concept again, but now with some quality cages. I have been thinking about the HTv2 or Steelheart.

My first question is, since I take care of that enlarged vein, which of the two device got bigger gap between the tube and the ring (especially in the lower part, where the testicles supposed to hang). I know that the SH is 15 mm, but I couldn’t find any information about the HTv2.

Another concern is my anatomy. I know that everyone is different, and that I need to try things out, but still: you are one of the most experienced people that I could ask about whether this device suits me or not. I’m a grower, from 8-9cm flaccid to 18cm. I have tight and high balls. I have a really bulky girth (mostly in erected form). I’m uncut, with really long foreskin.

So my second question, should I try this device or better to go with the HTv2, in your opinion?

(PS.: I’m not planning to use it 24/7, more likely to go with daily unlocks)

First off…7″ and “really bulky girth.”

lingering sigh

OK…

You don’t say anything about orgasm denial or the length of it you’ve experienced, but I found that being denied for longer periods also led to a swelling of my epididymis (I wrote about it but I’ll be damned if I can find the old post). Even to the extent that one might diagnose varicocele, I suppose, or inflammation of the epididymis. Along with soreness and tenderness, I always attributed it to severe blue balls and, for some time now, haven’t had a relapse of symptoms (though my epididymis is still more pronounced than that found in most men – something I’ve noticed some other men in chastity also exhibit, but not all). That being said, I’m not suggesting your symptoms were anything other than what you were told by your doctor. Regardless of the size of your eventual device, though, denial and the build-up of seminal fluids could also be contributory to your issues.

It’s also possible the UberKinky device was just too small for you. The fact that your cock has “really bulky girth” (sigh) and your balls are tight would combine to a create a very uncomfortable situation for a big dick (and 7″ by lots of girth is big). For that fact alone, I don’t think you should try the Holy Trainer. It’s made for the average-dicked and you, my friend, are not that.

So, fat cock and tight balls means bigger ring. I don’t know how big around your cock is when hard (and have only my fertile imagination to go by), but I suspect you’d have to wear something north of 45mm. Maybe even 50mm. You should measure the circumference of your cock and balls when very aroused and go with that. As you wear it over time, you’ll probably adjust and be able to wear a smaller ring. That can be ordered at the same time as the larger ring or you can get it later (though you’ll need to send the tube back to be fitted).

The tube should not be too long. If you’re 8-9cm long when flaccid, then probably no longer than 80mm. Maybe 75mm. With regard to the gap, no matter what the Steelworxx site says, you can order anything you want (type it in the notes if you have to). It’s hard to know what you need precisely, but perhaps you should measure the device you used to wear and add to that (but don’t go nuts).

You say you’ll be unlocked daily. If you’ll be left unlocked at night, you won’t need a device so precisely fitted since it’s the early morning erections that bite the hardest of all. If you’re locked at night, then you need to be more careful since that nocturnal erection will make a poorly-fitted device lock on you like a vice.

I hope that’s helpful.

August 28, 2017

Mailbag

A reader named Andrew left this comment to my last post…

I would be interested in hearing how many locked men have found that their locked status helped them achieve some sort of spiritual awaking or satisfaction of wearing a device, and for longer term wearers, do they miss the device when they are not wearing it. Also, I would be curious about a rather existential question if they view their device as something they own selves or something that someone else owns.

I don’t know about spiritual awakening, but I do feel that being locked and denied has put me in something like a new plane of existence, mentally. It’s as if being denied orgasm for so long has led me though a tunnel most men simply never even know exists. And once through it, while the craving and gnawing need to come is never far away, it’s more like a reactor powering this different sense of being than a negative. As if living without orgasm but in need of one is how I was meant to be. And had I not been denied, I’d have never known.

With regard to missing the device, it’s more than that. I resent not being able to wear it for whatever reason. The feeling of not being secured is foreign to me and unsettling and I only truly feel myself when there’s something covering the penis. I feel as though the Steelheart in particular is more me than what it secures and in those increasingly rare moments I see the unprotected penis in the mirror, it’s off-putting. Not all penises, of course. Just that one. It’s natural state is to be shiny and heavy between my legs, not squishy and flopping free.

It’s a thorny question as to who I feel owns the device. Of course, Belle controls my state but, as I said, it looks and feels more like me than what it contains so it’s hard to think of it as someone else’s at the same time. I refer to the devices as Belle’s but she doesn’t seem invested in which I wear at any given moment at this point. The key is almost always in a place I’m aware of, so even that isn’t so mysterious. I think the thing I feel isn’t mine isn’t so much the device or the penis but the sensation I get from the penis when it’s exposed. That’s not mine and it’s not something I should be able to feel without permission. That’s definitely across the line.

Brian said…

Those of us who have experienced durations of chastity, or even just denial, tend to experience a ‘plateau’ of the emotions generated. For me, it’s still an up and down experience, waxing and waning, if you prefer, but waxing and waning at a higher level than when I’m freely orgasming at my leisure. I’m pretty sure you’ve expressed this experience in your blog.

My question is this … You’ve been experiencing this state for longer than I can even imagine. Does that plateau gradually wane overall the further you go, or are your escalated emotions retaining their average elevation. (Lots of height synonyms there; I hope I’ve conveyed this adequately.)

What I’ve been feeling lately is a lengthening of the up and down waves. I don’t feel the dramatic increases like I used to. But also I don’t feel like I’m nearly as constantly horny as I once was. I can’t tell how much of this is simply getting older versus how much of this is being denied orgasm. Has my body adjusted to the hormonal load of not coming or is it just not as loaded as it once was? I don’t really know. I guess the only way to know for sure would be to start coming a lot and then stopping again. But that’s not a thing I have anything to do with.

I can say that the denial stops being so distracting and simply is, but I can’t say how long that takes. A long time. Years, for me. I do still go through periods of being pretty horny, but like I said, they’re not as severe as they once were and don’t seem to last as long.

Allen asked…

I recently came across your blog after someone told me about it on Reddit. In a recent post, you wrote something that captured my attention:

“I mean, I literally can’t fuck for more than two minutes before I’m squirting and then, once I do, the penis starts to shrivel. It may have been a fuck tool once, but it’s not now. It’s barely passable as such.”

I am a member of an odd web community of men who complain about an odd problem that I was wondering if perhaps you share with us. All my life, I have suffered from these “meh” orgasms coupled with premature ejaculation. Your words sound like they may describe a similar problem. Basically, the ejaculation comes too fast, and when it does, I don’t feel much of anything.

I recently took an interest in kink, and chastity play fascinates me. Since chastity play emphasises the part of sex that happens *before* orgasm, I thought that perhaps it might be a way to learn new ways to experience pleasure and express my sexuality. Unfortunately, my wife isn’t up for it right now, so I’m simply doing some cage-less chastity play with her. I think it may be a long time before I can make her comfortable with the idea of a chastity cage on me, but I am very patient.

The thought of making it impossible to masturbate and ejaculate and then be teased by her (or even by pornhub) sounds like it may be delightful.

I was wondering if you might relate to my words. I’m wondering if my experience tells me that I am like you.

When you sent this, I didn’t really, but just this past weekend Belle told me as I was fucking her that she wanted me to come and what happened sounds a lot like what you described. It should have been a kick-in-the-back-of-the-head kind of thing since it’s been months, but it wasn’t. There was no crest. Not crash. Just an increase of sensation and pumping of seed and that’s all. I kept stroking throughout – basically doing everything I’d normally do to come – but no post-orgasmic feelings. In fact, it pretty much felt like it always does after I ejaculate without orgasm.

I wasn’t given a chance to try again later that day or the next nor was I allowed to try and jack one out, so I don’t know if it’s a one time kind of deal or what. But once it happened, I recalled this note.

So normally, I’d say denial should enhance your sensations during orgasm because that’s what I’m used to, but now I don’t know. If that’s where you are now, perhaps not. That said, I do think it’s a great way to change the paradigm in bed away from male orgasm and towards other things. You don’t need a device to do that, just a recognition that successful sex isn’t defined by the guy shooting his load. Nor does it even require a hard penis. There’s so many other ways to enjoy sex but we’re all so focused on this one act. Literally, the money shot. Without it, it’s without value. Bullshit. Maybe your wife is freaked out by the kink aspect. I’d recommend being more circumspect towards that word. Just say you’d like to have sex in ways that focus on her and her orgasm and would like to, at least every other time or so, takes the penis out of the picture. That sounds way less scary that “male chastity” or what have you.

G asked…

I need your help. I am married bi man, have one kid. The problem I face is how to tell my wife I am bi and submissive. The moment I discovered our blog you became a role model, so please help me out.

I think you just build up the nerve and say it. You tell her and be ready to answer questions (like, no, bi isn’t gay) and be willing to make whatever compromises you think you can, but you should not feel as though there’s anything wrong with you for being this way. Ultimately, whether you can be happy in a vanilla straight relationship for the rest of your life (and people are all the time) is a question only you can answer, but my fear is a lot of guys in your position end up being guilted into buying that you’re broken in some way. You aren’t. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

August 25, 2017

The one where I ask Twitter questions

The other day, Andy of Ruffled Sheets asked a question on Twitter. He wanted to know the fit preference of chastity device wearers.

Screenshot 2017-08-25 10.40.18 Devices of the trapped-ball variety have two fit components, the ring and tube. I recommend tighter tubes but rings not too tight or too loose. Anyway, it got me thinking about other questions I had for guys in devices and even a few for those holding their keys. I used to do surveys on the site here, but haven’t in a while. Anyway, here are my questions and the answers I got.

Screenshot 2017-08-25 10.46.36 I wanted to know about the first device these guys ever wore and how it fit. As I suspected, most men say their first chastity device was too big. That was my experience, too. You think they should be more like the size of your erection or can’t imagine squeezing it into such a small space or get hung up on a device described as the “small” one. In any event, only 14% say they nailed the size on the first try. That’s a remarkable number if you think about. (Note that this question had a longer duration than the rest and, of this writing, is still technically open but is seems as though all the responses are in now.)

Screenshot 2017-08-25 10.51.00 Also unsurprisingly, most men say their first device was made of plastic. No only do I think that’s the smart thing to do when you’re not yet sure of your size or even if enforced chastity is right for you, plastic is of course cheaper than custom metal. Glad to see guys avoiding silicone since I think it’s a bogus device material. Curious to know what “something else” could be. Like…wood? Energy field? No clue.

If you take these two questions together, you have 22% of men who presumably mostly wore plastic as their first device and found it too small. I suspect these guys have really big dicks. If you’re way above the curve (over 6.5″ or so) in length or significantly girthy, you may have no choice but to go custom right out of the gate.

Screenshot 2017-08-25 10.55.29 The next questions are about expectations on both sides of the lock. For the men, how did they find enforced chastity once they tried it? Was it what they expected or better or worse? I suppose it’s good to see that so many say it was better since a lot of guys are led into the idea by unrealistic porn on the subject. Nearly two-thirds found reality to beat their fantasy and another 19% found it to be what they were expecting. I wonder if the those who answered it was worse than expected are due to issues with fit. Maybe those big-dicked guys again. Or maybe they bought CB-6000s and tore their scrotums up.

Screenshot 2017-08-25 10.56.19 No keyholders said they felt worse about locking their men up after they did it and over 90% said they felt better about it. That’s really a stunning number and may be skewed by the audience of kinksters on Twitter. Still, it blew me away. Keyholders like locking their men up, more than they thought they would.

Screenshot 2017-08-25 11.02.50 Combine that response with this one asking how they’d feel if their man wanted to stop wearing a device. A full two-thirds would rather he keep it on. Twenty-four percent would be OK with it coming off (perhaps recognizing that consent is required to do it) and only 10% would rather he not wear it. I wonder if the 9% who said male chastity was about what they expected were the same 10% who said they’d be relieved? Can’t really tell.

Bottom line, keyholders end up more satisfied with locked men than they though they would be and most would rather not let them out, even if they wanted it. That’s a BFD and something guys wondering how to break their desire to their partners might want to use while selling the idea.

Screenshot 2017-08-25 11.07.28 Unsurprisingly, most men got locked up for the first time because they wanted to. It seems rare for a partner to suggest it, especially since many of those who are doing it are in male-female relationships. Woman in our culture are not conditioned to suggest such things nor does society reward those who are that assertive, alas.

Screenshot 2017-08-25 11.45.21 However, when asked who holds their key, only 38% say it’s their partner so a lot of guys are doing this solo or leveraging friends and keyholding services. That also explains why so many guys are the initiator of enforced chastity.

I never even knew it was a thing when I was single so have a hard time relating. Not sure if I’d have the ability to stay locked if I was doing it on my own. I’d have to have an accomplice or service to help out.

Screenshot 2017-08-25 11.49.36 I asked keyholders about their interest in the concept of enforced chastity prior to their partner getting locked up. Only 25% said they had never considered it. Back when I started blogging about it, that number was way higher. Now, either because the practice has gained more publicity or because my Twitter audience is way kinkier than normal people or a combination of both, three-quarters were either curious or really into the idea beforehand.

Screenshot 2017-08-25 11.49.43 The kinkster bias is most noticeable in the question I asked about how kinky they were prior to being locked up or holding a key. Tom Allen has called male chastity a “gateway drug” into kink and that was my experience, but most of those who replied to my question already identified as kinky.

Screenshot 2017-08-25 11.49.16 Regarding duration of lock up, the biggest response was “sometimes” with the lowest being “rarely.” I intentionally left these kind of vague because a lot to one guy is not so much for another. “Almost all the time” was supposed to be people like me (>95% of the time) and “most” would be how I was a year ago (maybe 75% of the time). In any event, this also matches what I’ve seen in previous surveys with a dip between a lot and occasionally. Seems this is either a thing that becomes a lifestyle or it’s a thing you dabble in.

Screenshot 2017-08-25 11.57.39 Finally, I asked how many devices these people owned. Twitter only allows four options, but I wonder how many of the 1-3 guys only have one? And I wonder how many of those they have besides the one they usually wear are first attempts that either don’t fit or are uncomfortable. I think guys like me who have a small stable of devices they may find themselves in at any give moment are in the minority.

So what about you? Any of these responses surprise you? What would you have asked? I’m curious to know. Leave a comment!

August 1, 2017

July metrics

In the months of June and July, I’ve been on fourteen airline flights. Belle will have been on over twenty. We will have also been on different continents for half of the month. Hopefully, things will start to return to normal in August as she gets home and life starts to look like normal again.

FullSizeRender All that to explain, for the second month in a row, that things are weird. Not as much of anything as you might expect except for the time the penis has been locked up and out of sight.

In July, there was a device secured to me 98.8% of the time. I was without device for a whole nine and one-quarter hours, almost entirely due to two massages we had in the month. One was near the beginning of the month and happened on a cruise ship in Halong Bay, performed by a small Vietnamese woman with small, weak hands (alas). As usual, I took the device off because massages are traditionally done naked, but not, it turns out, on this ship. I had to leave my swimsuit on which was fucking weird. Had I known, I would have stayed in, but such is life. That accounted for just over 90 minutes of free time.

The second massage was for two whole hours and was done by an equally small Thai woman but she was terrifically strong and/or knew how to leverage her weight. I again assumed nakedness, but instead wore a ridiculous sheer square-cut pair of briefs she supplied. The only thing they ensured was that the penis wouldn’t flop around, but everything was clearly visible though the material and she even pulled them down over my ass to massage my glutes. I assume they were there as more of a deterrence to Westerners looking for enhanced services than modesty. That day I was unlocked for more than four hours. So, for the month, nearly two-thirds of the time I was out was for massages.

The remaining free time was either for Belle’s use or cleaning. I never flew on this trip without a device, either the Schandmaske or Holy Trainer. Neither made for even a blip in any security situation, even the TSA’s scanners.

While we’re on the subject, pour one out for the Schandmaske. I believe I lost it somewhere along the way since it wasn’t amongst my things when packing, wasn’t where I was keeping the devices, and hasn’t been found in my suitcase upon return. I’m holding out a small amount of hope it will turn up when Belle packs and leaves, but not much. Poor Schandmaske. I hardly knew ye.

The Steelheart has been on for the nearly two weeks I’ve been back as well as now and then before coming home so it ruled the month with 52% of the total time. The Holy Trainer and Halfshell more or less split the other half. The Schandmaske’s last hour happened somewhere in there.

Looking back over the year, 9.25 hours is the third longest I’ve been out over a month and bucks the trend of three consecutive months of ever-decreasing free time. I expect August to be back to around normal, so in the 4 hour range.

On the sex side, Belle only came six times. Four times with me and twice by herself. Well, at least twice. She sometimes forgets to keep me updated. By herself was via her vibrator and one of the times with me was on the penis. The remaining were from my fingers.

The one time on my penis I was about as close as I could get to coming without actually coming. I’ve struggled to define it, it was so close, but it didn’t feel like a whole orgasm. Perhaps because she wasn’t done with her pleasure and kept riding it after which is one way to ruin an orgasm. In any event, I’ve landed on not calling it one since I didn’t feel especially post-orgasmic after and my level of sexual frustration didn’t seem to falter. All tolled, I was inside her four times and ejaculated each time.

As I said, Belle gets home Saturday and then has to reset her clock, but it’ll be nice for us all to be home and things to return to as normal as possible.

July 7, 2017

June and half-year metrics

I’m a bit tardy with the June update seeing as we were in Vietnam on July 1st and I didn’t have my laptop with me. I didn’t want to peck it out on my phone.

June was a five device month. That may be a first. The Looker 02, Steelheart, Holy Trainer, Halfshell, and Schandmaske all had their time in the pouch.

The L02 was mostly before we left for Hong Kong and, I think, may be at the end of its life. The urethral insert is loose and I don’t think I’d pay to get it fixed because I’d also want to make all kinds of adjustments (slightly shorter cage, slightly thicker and longer insert) meaning if I have a device like it in the future, I’ll just get another one.

The Schandmaske just made it under the wire. As I was getting ready to go to the airport for the flight to Hanoi, I saw the potential for all five I bought to get some lock time. Belle’s been traveling separately (and more often) than the rest of us, so I have a free hand in deciding which device I wear and when I switch them out. I have her key and, thanks to misplacing it for a few hours, also have my back up both freely available. I’ve become something like the house cat that anxiously watches the birds on the feeder but won’t go out the front door when given the chance. The penis is now completely tamed and I have no interest at all in having it free.

We got back to Hong Kong after a week in China earlier in the month a day before Belle did, and I put myself in the Steelheart. I slipped the Holy Trainer off and pushed my balls through the tight A-ring followed by the penis and felt the cold steel wrap itself around the rapidly inflating meat. There’s something about the Steelheart. Something that feels like home and really the only device I wear that’s synonymous with “real” chastity. Maybe because it’s a bit too tight and the tube totally envelopes and replaces the penis (as opposed to the Halfshell where the bottom of the penis can be touched) and unlike the HT or the L02, it’s escape-proof. I dunno. But the psychology of being in that device over all others is very different. I’m wearing it now and just writing about it is filling it up.

As you can see in the chart, the penis’ time out was barely over an hour which by far is the lowest amount of the year and maybe ever in any month in all the years we’ve been using chastity in our marriage.

January – 10.75 hours (1.5%)
February – 5 hours (.7%)
March – 12.6 hours (1.7%)
April – 4.5 hours (.6%)
May – 4 hours (.5%)
June – 1 hour (.1%)

The briefness of this period is more related to issues other than Belle’s choices. As I said, lots of travel, some time with Belle being away, and for a week there I was sick with a nasty sore throat and didn’t want to give it to Belle. I suspect that the 4-5 hours a month will turn out to be normal for us over time.

Thanks to the issues mentioned above, I was well below other months (or my personal goal) of getting her off. Only four times. If she took care of herself while away, she never mentioned it. I was inside her just twice, though the second time she told me to come, exactly 120 days from the last time.

We’re half way through 2017 now. The Steelheart just edged past the Halfshell in total time with the Schandmaske far behind followed by the HT followed by the L02 (which went on for the first time and maybe last this year in June). The penis was free almost .9% over six months.

Belle has come forty-five times so far this year. Thirty times by my fingers, eleven times by her own hand, twice by me using her vibrator on her, once orally, and once on the penis. Belle always decides how she’ll come, so those numbers indicate her preferences, not mine (with the possible exception of the penis since that’s such an unreliable tool for her).

I’ve come twice in the first half. Once on February 18th and once on June 18th. I ejaculated 18 times without orgasm and was inside her 22 times. One time I got to be inside her and didn’t squirt. That’s an orgasm ratio of about 23:1.

It occurs to me writing this that I haven’t jacked off in about 10 months. That’s easily the longest period of such abstention since I discovered how to do it. Literally the only time the penis gets to feel pleasure is when it’s inside Belle and, of course, that’s exactly how she likes it. If she ever told me I could edge myself with my own hand, I’d jump at the chance since I really like jacking off, but it’s hard to say I miss it since to do it absent permission would be a total contravention of our dynamic. It’s another of those things I crave but do not miss. The only way I could would be by cheating and that seems like not only a violation of her trust but something that’s against my very nature as who I am sexually.

Anyway, that’s that. Half a year down.

June 1, 2017

May metrics, ups and downs

FullSizeRender And there goes May! So many projects going on around here, house guests, graduation, not to mention planning and preparation for our imminent departure to Asia for a huge chunk of the summer. But there’s one thing that doesn’t change: I’m still locked up pretty much all the time.

Belle kept the penis locked 99.5% of May which is the highest percentage of the year (exceeding April by a tenth of a percent). It was kept staring at the inside of the Steelheart for about two-thirds of the time while the rest was spent studying the inside of the Halfshell.

It was let out for sex six times for a total of almost four hours which averages to about 40 minutes each time. That’s funny to me since the vast majority of that time is spent satisfying Belle or lounging around after. The time it spent actually fucking couldn’t have been in total more than ten or twelve minutes, tops. So if you count the time she will sometimes stroke it while I’m getting her off, we’re talking 30-45 minutes a month of pleasurable sensation.

Belle came nine times, three on her own, six from my prestidigitation. That’s down by three from April, but as I said, more stuff going on around here.

I came zero times in May, though as I said, I was allowed to fuck her six times. I ejaculated five of those times. As of this writing, it’s been 102 days since my last orgasm. Of course, I have no idea how long it will be until the next one and doubt she does, either.

There’s something I’ve been meaning to write about for the past few weeks but haven’t figured out how or what words exactly to use then I figured I could make it part of this post. It’s funny, but when writing like this sometimes the hardest part is figuring out how to start and, once that’s done, the rest takes care of itself.

Anyway, as hard as it is to quantify as precisely, the thing that goes along with how often I get to come or for how long I’m locked up is how I feel about it all. And lately, I haven’t felt all that great. It’s been about two and half weeks since I felt the bottom drop out and only now am I starting to feel the stirrings of a rally.

I think a common misperception about denial and enforced chastity is that the locked guy gets hornier and hornier and all that awesome frustration energy powers the whole dynamic to ever greater heights. That’s just totally wrong.

Most guys who feel like it get to come all the time. As soon as the slightest amount of sexual frustration builds, they either have sex or take care of themselves. If it were charted, it’d end up looking like with I think of as a hacksaw blade. When a guy is in his teens, his chart would like a fine-tooth saw — lots and lots of little spikes closely packed interspersed with shallow, short valleys. But when he get’s older, the “teeth” become less frequent with larger spaces between, but the basic pattern remains. There is only so horny a normal man will get before he relieves the pressure to come, one way or another.

But if you’re like me, that never happens. And since the pressure never gets relieved, an underlying pattern is exposed. I don’t know if this is the same for all men, but for me the build goes way higher than it would normally. Perhaps five times higher. Then it plateaus for a long time as I reach cruising altitude. After a certain period like that, it will explode higher for brief period then come crashing down. Lower than what it feels like after an orgasm. Like, a depth so low the fish have to make their own light or not bother to have eyes. I can’t say if the cratering is chemical or caused by external issues or if one is exacerbated by the other. All I know is it happens from time to time.

This used to be a real problem. It’s easy to get depressed. I still do, but the difference is I know it’s not permanent. Sooner or later, for reasons I can’t explain, things will start to build again. Right now, I’m still under water but not so deep that sunlight can’t get to me. It feels like I’m moving in the right direction, but I also know there are false glimmers. When I’ll start to feel more normal but then things’ll go south again. I can’t know yet where I am, but this feels like a real rebound.

When I’m in this place, it’s like the flavor is drained from everything. I’m easily angered and have little interest in anything sexual. I will usually be able to perform for Belle, but I’d not think to instigate anything. It has to be her to push the button. This is the time when, if I find a dirty selfie on my phone or computer, I’m most likely to delete them. I don’t look at my own blog, can’t imagine writing anything, and don’t even look at Tumblr. The toys I enjoy during normal times appall me. It’s not any fun at all.

The worst part is how it changes how I see myself. I’ve said before that being locked all the time alters my own perception of myself at a pretty basic sexual level. I feel less like a man and more like something else. That’s not a bad thing. It’s just what it is. But during a crater like I’ve been in I stop feeling like anything. Whichever steel is between my legs is just an inert mass I need to keep clean. I don’t want to be locked, I don’t want to be unlocked. I just don’t care. No energy means no self-perception of identity. And what are we without identity?

I don’t say all this to be a downer. We’ve been doing this long enough for me to know that in my case it’s a normal aspect of long term denial and lock-up. I will come back and will feel good again. If I go all the way back to why I started this blog, it was because at the time there was way more chastity fantasy bullshit being passed off as reality and little real-life experience being related to those who were just starting out. If I ignored this aspect of denial and chastity, I’d be doing a disservice to the sprit of the site. And, I guess, to you as its readers.

Long story short, most of the time I’m in a good place and feel as though the denial and submission are by far net benefits in my life. I can’t imagine really being “normal” again. Not ever. But it’s not all sunshine and unicorns, either. You know, like life.

May 1, 2017

April metrics

April showers have brought…May showers here at Winterfell and the end of the month means another entry in my ongoing chastity and denial metrics project.

Belle had the penis locked up 99.4% of the month. The four and a half hours it was unlocked were the cumulative time she wanted to use it during sex. The whole rest of the time, it was secured. Even though I flew in April, the Schandmaske made it possible to remain locked through airport security. For the year, the penis has been made inaccessible by one device or another for 98.9% of the time.

The Halfshell was the predominant device used in April, though I started and ended the month in the Steelheart. On the year, the use of each is split pretty evenly: 1,280.5 hours in the Halfshell and 1,258 in the Steelheart. By the end of today, they’ll be tied. Basically, if Belle expresses a preference, it’s always the Steelheart and if I’m left to wear what I want, it’s usually the Halfshell, though I notice that so far this year I have not worn either the Jail Bird or the Looker 02.

On the orgasm front, Belle was in fine form after three below-average months. She came 12 times in April, twice as often as she did in each of the first three months of the year. I have an informal goal of getting her off about 10 times over 30 days, so this was a good effort. Three of those were when she was by herself travelling, one was when I used a vibrator on her, seven were from my fingers, and she had her first orally induced orgasm of the year. She also had her first multiple orgasm day of the year.

I had zero orgasms in April. The last time I came was February 18, seventy-two days ago. She allowed me to fuck her four times, though, and I leaked into her each time.

This is another month with Belle being away for part of it due to travel, though that didn’t slow her down last month. It’ll be a busy month beyond that, though, with family visiting and the high school graduation of our oldest kid and various home improvement projects going on. In June, we’re going to college orientation for the previously aforementioned kid and embarking on a grand adventure in which the whole family will be living in Hong Kong for 6-8 weeks. That’ll be interesting, for sure. In any event, life is picking up its pace as it does every summer and it’ll be interesting to see how that impacts what I track here.

April 19, 2017

CB-6000 review (finally)

The other day while looking at Tumblr I noticed something strange. I found myself on someone’s Tumblr that was all men locked in chastity devices which are not normally the kinds of Tumblrs I hang out on or follow because I think most male chastity porn is kind of boring. I’ll post the occasional picture of a guy in a device (not counting my own, of course), but they’re remarkably repetitious (counting my own) and the kinds with captions rarely do anything for me.

So anyway, I will occasionally look at these “show me your locked cock” Tumblrs to see what people are wearing. It’s how I find out about new devices. What I noticed the other day was along with a bunch of metal that looked like cheap Chinese shit you get off Amazon and the occasional Mature Metal or Steelworxx device were a lot of Holy Trainers (v2). Like, at least half were Trainers. I’d guess half as many of those were CB-6000s. This was surprising because my CB-6000 tips and tricks page is still, all these years after I wrote it, the number one page on the site after the homepage. I have no idea why this is because the top search terms WordPress says people are using to find the site now rarely include the CB-6000. So I don’t really know how these people are finding the page, but a lot of them are. Every single day. My review of the Holy Trainer v2 is usually half or two-thirds as popular in any given month.

This bums me out because I’ve assumed these numbers more or less indicate how popular the two devices are and I think the Holy Trainer is far superior to the aging design of the CB-6000. But then I see this Tumblr and all the guys in Trainers and that makes me wonder. What’s going on?

I decided to crowdsource a possible answer. I asked Twitter “If you were recommending a first male chastity device, which would it be?” The poll is still open at the time I’m writing this so it can still change, but as of right now, 99 people have responded and, lo and behold, the Holy Trainer holds a clear lead. Nearly half (48%) say it’s the device they’d recommend to a newbie while the CB-6000 comes in second at just over a third (34%) saying it’s their choice. The Bird Locked comes in a distant third (as it should — not a fan of silicone chastity devices).

The Holy Trainer is, in my opinion, the correct choice. And yes, we’ve been over this before, but that was a few years ago. And it occurs to me I never actually reviewed the CB-6000 because I wasn’t doing that kind of thing when I wore it. So, I shall consider this its review.

The CB-6000 is overly complicated. It has spacers to allow a flexible distance between the tube and the ring and it has multiple ring sizes. That ends up being a dizzying number of size combinations that I used to think was a strength but now think is just too much. It makes people think fitting a device to a penis is tricky when it’s really not that much.
It has a hard-edged A-ring. Trust me, that’s miserable. Not the good kind of discomfort. And for the life of me, I can’t imagine why it’s still like this. The device has been on the market for something close to ten years and it’s never been replaced with a rounded A-ring like the CB-3000 had. It’s never been redesigned to a more ergonomic shape like literally every other plastic device on the planet. It’s still perfectly round and sharp and causing many men all kinds of awful pain that simply isn’t necessary.
It has obnoxious side vents. One might assume they’re for hygiene’s sake, but they’re totally unnecessary and lead to flesh bulging through during erections which in turn leads to soreness and even broken skin. A lot of guys epoxy them over.
It’s the only device I’ve worn that led to the development of edema. That’s the accumulation of fluid under the skin and it’s benign if caught and allowed to dissipate, but it’s uncomfortable. I believe this is caused by the fact that the tube is narrow along the shaft but far more open near the head leading to constriction, even when flaccid.
The tube is made up of two halves joined together. In the early years, they split more often than seemed acceptable. Their design makes that a possibility even now and, from what I’ve been told, there is no pain like the pain of penis skin being trapped and pinched down the entire length of one’s member as an erection goes away.
It still uses a padlock. They bounce around and take up room in your pants. They corrode. They can have sharp edges that poke.
Lastly, and I acknowledge this is subjective, the CB-6000 is simply ugly. It looks like a medical device your grandpa has to wear, not a sex toy. The “fashion” variants (gold, wood grain, camo, etc.) are like when Cadillac made the Cimarron. It was flashy and had lots of Caddy badges, but underneath it was still a Chevy Cavalier.

The Holy Trainer isn’t perfect, but it has none of those issues. It’s A-ring is so much more comfortable and it has never led to edema on me. It doesn’t have vents along the tube (the holes it does have are in the penis head area and don’t lead to the same issues). The tube is solid and made of a more forgiving, comfortable plastic. It’s also far more attractive (basic black is my preferred color). And it’s dead simple. Three parts, including the lock (which is integrated and won’t corrode or stop working).

The biggest improvement I think could be made to the Trainer would be an option of buying it with all three ring sizes. Ring size is the most important element in male chastity and is the difference between a device a guy can keep on for days or weeks at a time and one that can’t stay on overnight. It’s too bad they don’t have a bundled option for newbies to be able to try the different sizes.

There were serval comments to my tweet about “cheap knockoffs” available on Amazon for both the CB-6000 and Holy Trainer. Insert here my standard warning about saving a few bucks while at the same time endangering your one and only penis. Personally, I’d pay the extra $10-50 bucks and get the original, but I’m also the guy who buys genuine Apple Watch bands over their $9 Amazon counterparts.

I think the CB-6000 is a hugely important device for male chastity advocates and enthusiasts. It was the first really popular mass-produced device and undoubtedly led to many men and women (millions?) giving the concept of chastity a try. You know, like Belle and I. But times have moved on. There has been innovation in the space and the CB-6000 has not kept up. It’s a relic from another era.

If you’re thinking of buying a CB-6000, spend your money on the Holy Trainer instead.