Category: Chastity Nerdery

Those posts where I (mostly) drone on endlessly about living in enforced chastity.

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March metrics

IMG_1958I keep saying these months are weird and they are but if this keeps up I’m going to have to find a new adjective. Belle often has a bunch of travel in the first quarter and this year I do too plus Spring Break and shared hotel rooms, etc. I find it hard remembering what normal was like.

Anyway, Belle only had seven orgasms in March and I only gave her two of those. The rest were self-administered. Part of that was due to a trip of hers over a weekend and two more weekends in hotel rooms with the kids, but she did take care of herself one morning after the kids and I left her alone. That was both slightly painful since I would have liked to give it to her but also cool that he took matters into her own hands. Regardless, her number was a bit below average.

I was allowed out of chastity three times to fuck her. The last time, about mid-month, she told me to come and I did. Well, as well as I can now. It wasn’t especially great for me. As I’ve said, my orgasms are kind of broken. I honestly can’t remember one that felt really good. They don’t feel a ton different from the leakages that happen when I fuck Belle except for the post-orgamsic feelings (and even those are less intense than they used to be).

The more observant among you might be saying, Wait a minute. He fucked her three times but only got her off twice? Yes. She got herself off one of those times since she had me come before she did. I laid there and gave her moral support, though.

In reflecting upon that orgasm and my recent funk, it seems they must be linked. My sub drop was too extreme to be from anything else. But it couldn’t have been just the hormonal release that made it happen. I haven’t dropped that much from an orgasm in a long time. I think it was less hormonal and more emotional. My orgasms are so pathetic now and really give me so little pleasure and I feel sort of resentful about that. Not that they’re that way. Not that they’re not the events they used to be. But that they happen at all.

This gets dangerously close to topping from bottom. I’m not allowed to ask for or refuse orgasm. But it’s how I’m feeling. I wish they didn’t need to happen. I feel like enough “plumbing” issues are taken care of with the occasional expression of fluid when I’m allowed to penetrate Belle. I just really, really, really don’t want to come. Really. Clearly, this is something we need to talk about.

Last night, perhaps as a preface to this line of thought, I asked Belle to leave me locked up longer. I’ve already been in for three weeks without release (since the day I came) and I feel a powerful need to stay locked up longer. It’s hard to explain. I don’t want to see the penis. I don’t want to feel pleasure through it. I only want to feel it strain and crave and be denied. I want it out of sight and out of mind as a thing separate from its containment. I feel as though this is part of the evolution I talked about a few months ago. That I feel my predominant sexual identity is “bottom,” not bisexual. And I define “bottom” as someone who only provides sexual pleasure to another. I love getting Belle off. I love feeling her orgasm course through her body. It’s a potent thing for me to experience through her. I know in my subbie heart I need to be there for her when she wants to feel a hard penis inside her. I know it’s my duty. But…it’s hard. And getting harder.

I reject the old trope that being locked up and denied for longer and longer periods makes one hornier and hornier forever. That’s simply not how it works. But I do subscribe to the idea it makes one more of what they are. It makes one more submissive or more whatever. The hormonal load one carries around is like sexual MSG enhancing all the preexisting predilections. I surmise it would be possible to back me out of this frame of mind regarding orgasm and penis use if I wasn’t locked up all the time. If I was able to pleasure myself with it and even have regular orgasms. I think that would eventually reset everything. But that’s not where we are so that’s not how I am. And in the meantime, my predilections are becoming more and more prominent. I do not have an opinion as to whether or not this is mentally healthy. I think someone from the outside would read all this and think I was in a bad place. I don’t feel that way at all. I feel like it’s all perfectly natural and in a lot of ways it just feels right. But I am left with the internal conflict of not wanting to do for Belle something she wants and needs from me. At least not right now. That’s causing me angst.

Whew, that got really serious and deep. More than I expected. Let’s talk about chastity devices and lighten the mood a bit, shall we? I primarily wore the Steelheart in March. I traveled earlier in the month wearing the Holy Trainer v2 and over Spring Break wearing the Holy Trainer v3 nano. The gap on the bottom of the HTv3 tube really pisses me off because without it that device would be spectacular. However, it’s so bad I found one of my testicles behind the ring three times over ten days. I was even able to take the device totally off and put it back on again in the shower, all the while leaving it locked. That’s simply unacceptable for a male chastity device, in my opinion.

I went back into the Steelheart as soon as we got home and it feels enormous. The HTv3 nano is a perfect size and much smaller than the Steelheart. I feel like it’s time to size down again. I’ve been chatting with a guy on Tumblr who has a new custom device from Steelworxx that’s kind of part Steelheart and part Looker with a locking PA fixing underneath. I’m going to ask Belle if I can start working with Deitmar on a new design that’s basically a Steelheart with that locking PA part, a slightly larger base ring, and a shorter and narrower tube. It would need to maintain the Steelheart look Belle prefers but I’ve definitely…er…”outgrown” is the wrong word. Undergrown? Whatever. It needs to be smaller.

Note, I am not saying the penis is shrinking due to chastity. That’s not a thing no matter how hot the idea sounds to you. It’s still the same size it was the nine plus years ago we started all this. But my preferences and tolerances definitely have changed.

Anyway, due to all the traveling, my locked up time was 99.7% of the month. I was out only 2 hours and 13 minutes, mostly to fuck but also for some cleaning. That’s one minute less than last month and 8 minutes more than January. The one-third of one percent free time average has extended for three months now and is about half the time out I was allowed out in November and December and is much lower than 2018’s year end total of 2%.

So now it’s April and it’s snowing outside. Great. More weirdness.

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February Metrics

 

IMG_1359February continued the weirdness of January. Trips, illnesses, etc., conspired to keep us apart and/or make our time together non-optimal.

I was outside a chastity device three times for a total of just over two hours in February, or about three tenths of one percent of the month. I was in the Steelheart mostly (nearly 60%), but when I travelled, I used the Holy Trainer v2 rather than the v3 because I like it better. The remaining time, I was in the Halfshell.

Belle came eight times which is bang-on her average and a bit higher than January. I gave her half of those via prestidigitation and she gave herself the other half. She allowed me to come zero times in the month leaving me at zero for the year so far.

I was allowed inside her three times but issues with a reluctant erection meant only two were successful. I leaked both times I was inside her. The morning I couldn’t get it up she let me jack off for a short while which was nice. It’s been well over a year since I was allowed to do that just for the sake of doing it. I leaked a bit.

In my last post, I said, “It’s a fact that she just doesn’t think about me being locked all the time,” and Belle wanted me to know (so I’m telling you) that that’s not the case. She says she thinks about me being locked up all the time. It’s nice to hear that, of course. I think the second half of that sentence, “And there’s really nothing in her mind that should keep me from being that way,” is still accurate.

Belle’s out of town this morning, but I think this is the last time we’ll be apart over a weekend for a little while. I have more trips planned in the month, but they’re during the week. At the end of the month, we have Spring Break to California. So…still not a normal month. What were those like, again?

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January metrics

IMG_0996I spent all month forgetting that January has 31 days in it, not 30. Not that it really matters, but it would be so much more convenient for everyone if months had the same number of days in them.

Anyway, Belle and I were only together about eight days this month. That led to way less penis free time and far fewer trips into the pussy but a relatively respectable number of orgasms for Belle.

She came seven times which is one less than her 2017 monthly average. Five of those she gave herself, naturally, since she was alone. It’s possible she had more since she was kind of forgetful in letting me know. I, of course, had no orgasms in January.

I was unlocked a paltry one quarter of one percent of the month. Just two hours and five minutes. The average from 2017 was 97.9%, so 99.75% is…more. Doesn’t sound like a lot, but I can feel the difference.

Since Belle was away and I could wear whatever I wanted, I was in six different devices. The Steelheart was again number one with 42% of the time but the Holy Trainer v3 nano made a good showing owing to the two work trips I made in the month. I also wore the Halfshell for about a week and micro for a few days. I even dabbled with the metal Holy Trainer (which I can confirm I still don’t like) and tried the Looker 02 for a bit before deciding it was bugging me. I was only able to fuck Belle twice, which isn’t much of a surprise.

Belle is still sick and now I’ve got it, so it’s unclear when we’ll get back into the swing of things. She has a trip to Mexico planned with her girlfriends later in the month and I’m traveling again for work (though this time I’ll probably wear the Holy Trainer v2 rather then the v3 nano). Regardless, I know she’s really wanting some attention from me and I badly need to make her come, so I sense some sick sex is in our future.

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Holy Trainer v3 Nano review

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Previously, I’ve been pretty vocal in my position that the Holy Trainer male chastity device is the best option on the market for those looking to dip their…er, toe into the “chastity lifestyle.” So when a new version of the device is introduced, it’s a big fucking deal. Can the third version of probably the best starter device on the market improve on its impressive predecessor?

HTv2 vs. HTv3

The third version of the Holy Trainer, like the second, comes in four colors, but instead of the HTv2’s clear, black, white, and pink the HTv3 comes in clear, black, pink, and purple. I, for one, don’t mind seeing the white one go away. To me, it always looked like an orthopedic device. Medical play in the most unsexy way. Purple is the new guy on the block and for those Minnesota Viking and University of Washington fans, presumably. I opted for black as my review unit, but note that their site shows a solid black like the HTv2 and what I got was a translucent, smoky black. My preference in chastity devices is to not have the penis visible, so I would have liked the solid color. Note they are able to make the device in a number of custom colors (as seen on this page) for an extra $20.

Another superficial change between the second and third generation devices is the lock mechanism. It still uses what Holy Trainer calls the “MagicLocker” (a perverted cabinetry lock and the same one used by companies like Steelworxx and Rigid Chastity), but the way the tube and ring fit together has been changed.

The Holy Trainer website says the new version is “more discreet” and it does present a modestly lower bump, but honestly, I think in practice they’re a horse apiece. Oddly, their site also says the HTv3 is the “first padlock free chastity device” but the HTv2 used the exact same lock as the HTv3 (in fact, Belle locks me up with a lock we originally got from Steelworxx back in day — they’re all interchangeable).

The A-ring (Holy Trainer calls it “the ring” but A-ring is what the CB-X people call it on their devices and it’s the term I just keep using for some reason) is pretty much exactly the same as before except for the changes in how it attaches to the tube. It still comes in the same four sizes as before: 36mm, 40mm, 45mm, and 50mm. The HTv2 tubes and rings are not compatible with the HTv3.

The big difference found on the HTv3 is the tube. The HTv2 tube came in two sizes: Standard and small. The HTv3 comes in standard and small like before but they’ve added maxi and nano to the lineup. The maxi tube is obviously for maxi penises, but isn’t all that much longer than the standard tube (which is fine because shorter is always better). To me, maxi looks like it’s for men with more girth than average. The nano is small. Half an inch shorter than the standard tube and the one I tested.

Now it’s time to cover the six criteria upon which I judge devices: Cost, aesthetic, fit/comfort, security, hygiene, and stealth.

Cost

I ordered the HTv3 from the Holy Trainer website. All sizes and colors cost $165 with two shipping options to the United States ($14 for 4-5 day delivery or $28 for two day delivery). This is more than the CB-6000 by about $15 (the other mass market plastic chastity device) but since the Holy Trainer is better than the CB-6000 in every way, I think it’s a reasonable price. I can’t recall what the HTv2 cost, but they’re still being sold on the Holy Trainer website and they’re going for the same price as the HTv3. If the HTv2 was being sold at a discount and you were looking for either the standard or small sizes, I’d say buy it instead of the v3, but they’re the same.

Aesthetic

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I think the Holy Trainer design since v2 is classic and hard to beat (AHAHA see what I did there!?). It’s got clean, simple lines and looks great. The HTv3 is just the same. Maybe, with the sleeker lock bump, slightly better. High marks, as before.

The nano tube is noticeably smaller and more compact than even the short tube which, if you’re into the minimizing aspect of enforced chastity, is a definite plus. But it’s not so small as to make the penis appear to have disappeared like the micro device I recently reviewed.

Fit and comfort

Say it with me: Shorter is better. And the nano is both. So from the aspect of what one would reasonably expect in comfort from a device meant to constrict and stifle one’s erections, it’s great. As good if not better than the HTv2.

Processed with VSCO with av4 presetHowever, on the device I received, there was a small piece of plastic that appears to be a protruding remnant of the molding process and, after several days, it began to irritate. It doesn’t look like much in the photo, but it’s right in a spot where the tube is pushed against my scrotum during periods of maximum pressurization. And it doesn’t take much of an imperfection to cause a worrisome sore against tender skin when one’s active. It’s a disappointing quality issue and one I would expect not to be on every device shipped.

Security

Processed with VSCO with fr4 presetFor reasons I can’t quite figure out, Holy Trainer has decided to make the nano sized tube a much less secure device than any other size they make. This is specific to the v3 since it’s the only that comes in the nano size. As you can see in the comparison images above, the nano tube is designed with a massive gap between the tube and the A-ring. Much larger than there was on the small v2 tube or, according to the images on their site, any of the other tube sizes. I guess this is for comfort during erections, but the end result is a tube that leaves the very spot of the penis that’s necessary to stimulate to achieve orgasm unprotected.

Of course, no trapped-ball device without some kind fixing through a piercing is “secure” in that penises can be pulled out and put back in of nearly all devices, but in this case, one could stimulate themselves to orgasm without withdrawing at all. Turns out, the Halfshell has the same design flaw (though the PA fixing does get in the way a bit), so the HTv3 nano isn’t alone with this issue, but there’s no reason for the gap to be that big. This issue alone would prevent me from wholeheartedly recommending the nano size.

I’ve said before that devices without real security (and even some of those) are really no more than deterrents that keep wandering hands off the fun bits in moments of weakness. If that’s the most basic test of a device, then the nano size of the HTv3 fails since eager fingers can still get to a spot a lot of men might be able to get off from. But if you’re the kind of guy who doesn’t need much more than simple barrier (like me), then the nano HTv3 will be enough. If not, get the small tube since it lacks the puzzling gap.

Hygiene

The nano HTv3 size squishes the penis up more than the small HTv2 did and therefore makes peeing more of a “pray and spray” kind of endeavor. Which, in turn, makes stand-up peeing a bit of a gamble (I don’t bother trying). That complicates hygiene, but the device is no more difficult to keep clean otherwise. I prefer stainless steel to plastic in general as it can feel cleaner, but the HTv3 scores pretty well in this regard.

Stealth

Since it’s so small, the nano HTv3 is really stealthy. The Holy Trainer design has always tended to push the penis back into the scrotum which contributes to its stealthiness and that’s only accentuated with the smaller tube. The two pieces of the device fit together very snugly and the lock is totally integrated which means it’s also perfectly silent.

Summary

The ridiculous gap between the tube and the ring in the nano size is an unfortunate design choice. The other sizes don’t have this issue, so in those versions (and assuming the issue my unit had with finish is a fluke), the Holy Trainer v3 is every bit as good as the HTv2 and remains my top recommendation for those looking for a plastic device or are just starting out with male chastity.

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Mailbag

A new year, a new batch of questions…

Puppy Aslan woofed:

I am a young puppy and my Master wants to keep me in chastity 24/7. He has a CB2000 but it is not very safe. We are planning to buy one from which I can not escape. We have thought about Steelheart with PA fixing and Looker 02. But he does not like the idea of putting me a PA. So Looker 02 could be a good option. I use the bike for daily commute and I practice swimming three times. The maximum that I have wore a chastity device have been 2 months and I have tested the sounding a few times and I loved it. We are concerned about hygiene (my Master likes dirty play) and the possibility of injury (I am a sporty puppy). What do you recommend? Do you have any advice?

I think a device with an urethral insert would be a bad fit for you. One, you mention “dirty” play and the insert makes issues like UTIs far more likely. Also, I don’t imagine a solid insert would work well with biking. Either you’re going to need to be OK with the less secure insert-less and PA-less devices or your master is going to need to get over his aversion to a PA.

Altergo asked:

Thumper, Firstly, thanks for having this blog. I feel like it would be ridiculous to write to or speak about this with someone that doesn’t already have the desire to have erections and orgasms controlled. My Wife and I have been experimenting with a CB-6k off and on for the last few months and I know we are both enjoying it. Although we have no plans to make this a full time lifestyle, we are going to use chastity as a sexual reward system for things I want.

We discussed this topic at length last night, I in my cage and she delicately stroking my balls while laying naked beside me. Of all the rewards, the one I want most requires 30 days locked up. How do you prepare yourself to do that kind of time without a release? Or, do you get releases during long stretches?

I don’t really do much of anything in preparation. Belle allows me orgasm about once every three months (on average) and, other than the times she wants the penis for sex, I’m locked up. It’s more a mental thing than a physical one, I’ve found.

The thing that struck me as interesting about your question is wanting a longer lock up period as a reward. This makes perfect sense to me since once I started being denied and locked up I wanted to be denied and locked up for longer and longer periods, but it’s probably something the newbie would find counter-intuitive.

We discussed a system by which I could earn a day off each day I let her edge me to orgasm and go back in. is that something you have tried? I mean it would be nice to get out and breathe a bit, but I think it would be impossible to will an erection away after a while.

Edging is wonderful. Belle used to let me do it to myself before I lost that privilege. Getting rid of an erection after a session of edging can be difficult. I’d recommend either a package of frozen peas on the offending penis or, if that doesn’t work (and it doesn’t always), an ice-cold shower.

What is your opinion on prostate milking? Does it relieve desire at all or just build up?

Prostate stimulation can help express built up seminal fluids but it will do nothing at all to relieve sexual frustration. Quite the opposite, in fact. But be careful since some men can orgasm from nothing else but prostate stimulation.

Kinkyandperky posed:

Thanks for collating all your reviews – your dedication to the cause does you proud. I wanted to tap into your expertise with a question, as a reasonably experienced user looking to upgrade.

So I have had a silicone device which I used for 3-4 months, until the end of my last D/s relationship. This was my first device and it taught me a LOT, in particular, how to develop workarounds to overcome the numerous problems that seemed to crop up. I am now in a new D/s and wanting to get a new device, upgrading to metal; I have my eye on a few ‘semi-solid’ styles (not sure what the technical term for them is), but I have some concerns about overcoming old problems – and wanted to consult your expertise, because I don’t know whether what I experienced last time was a product of the device or an occupational hazard one has to work around.

The main thing is keeping the device in place – I found the ring slipping off an issue not so much because of shrinking balls (though that was sometimes the issue) but it seemed like, the need to push the penis one side or the other inside trousers had the effect of easing it off in the course of a day and it never felt secure. Would metal make it worse, being heavier, or are there some obvious pointers to think about pre-purchase. I developed a harness as a workaround, but my Domme wants to rule out a harness on aesthetic grounds.

This sounds like an A-ring that’s too big. Your balls should not be slipping out ever or for any reason. Perhaps you have unusually small testicles, but more likely, you just need a smaller ring. I wrote a thing once about getting the size right.

Also, as a circumcised man, are there any issues or styles I need to avoid or, indeed, would be better off with?

No, a circumcised penis is the best kind to lock up.

Finally, I noticed in some comments made elsewhere on a blog post, you were a bit down on the House Of Denial as a supplier, though I have liked the look of several of their styles, and whether this was on grounds of quality, design or what. A number of the styles you review above are fully enclosed, so if you didn’t like the HoD, I was interested in pointers towards decent supplier of a semi-solid/semi-cage style like the HoD S87. Using good old Mr Google directs me towards the non-specialist suppliers or HoD.

Thanks for any help you can provide.

House of Denial sells a metal knockoff of the Holy Trainer and in my review I noted that it was unfinished inside the tube to such an extent that it injured me during what I consider typical wear. I cannot recommend any retailer or manufacturer that would knowingly sell a substandard product like that.

The device you like appears to be a knockoff of one of several of the devices made by Steelworxx. Mature Metal also has one that looks kind of like it. I’d advise going with one of them, even though it will cost you more.

Good luck, everyone!

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November metrics

IMG_A38ED57DBFF7-1September was weird because I was unlocked so much, October was weird because I was only locked up, November was back to what we call normal around here. I was locked up 99.5% of the time and unlocked just over a half of one percent meaning it rounded up in my tracking app to 1%.

Most of the time, I was in the Steelheart and the rest of the time was split between the Holy Trainer v3(!) and the Halfshell. I was in the HTv2 for like a day for some reason I can’t recall but had something to do with worrying about metal detectors.

Yes, the Holy Trainer v3 has entered the mix here at Thumpermedia Global Headquarters. I am tardy at writing my review for that and hope to get around to it in the next few days.

Belle let me out to fuck her six times in November which is well over the 3.6 times averaged over the previous ten months but I expect she was making up for not getting any penis the previous month. Honestly, I felt sort of spoiled getting so much pussy. Especially since she let me have an orgasm near the beginning of the month. That was my fourth orgasm of the year.

She had eleven orgasms in the month which is the second highest number this year. Two of those she gave herself (one of those when I was present), one was from going down on her, and two happened on the same day (which is a real banner event for her). The rest were the result of prestidigitation.

Belle told me she may let me jack off for Christmas and if anything represents the spirit of Christmas more than allowing one’s husband to abuse himself for the first time in 15 months, I don’t know what it is. Gives a who new meaning to buche de Noël. More like brindille de Noël, perhaps…

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The best penis for male chastity

I’ve often said there is no such thing as The One True Way™ to do enforced male chastity. But over the years and due to my own personal experience, reading the experiences of others, and the feedback and questions I’ve received from readers, I do think there’s a “perfect penis” when it comes to enforced chastity. That’s not to say penises of all shapes and conditions aren’t equally qualified to be locked up. I think they should be. But it’s true that some configurations will lead to a more satisfying and easier time of it. These are the three most important attributes, in my considered opinion.

Size

Like most natural objects, erect penis size is distributed along a bell curve. The chart below was found here and charts the results from a Dutch study. Most studies of erect penis size show that bulk of them fall somewhere around 6″. This is why most off-the-shelf chastity devices are about the same size (and, since you can see the shorter side of the curve is somewhat better represented, a lot of them are also available in a smaller size).

penis-size-histogram

I’ve said many times, smaller devices are better, but it’s also true that they’re designed to fit the meaty, as it were, peak of that curve. If the penis you want to lock up is farther away from the peak, in either direction, then its experience will be impacted when considering a mass-produced product.

And that’s just length. The other dimension to consider is girth. I found another impressive chart filled with many numbers and exciting color-coding. It shows in a different way that, again, there’s a definite erect average that’s just over 5″ circumference.

average+penis+size+chart.png

And like before, the mass-produce devices are designed for that — ahem — fat part of the curve. If you have penis that’s normal length but extra girthy, you’re just as screwed as before when buying a stock device.

All that being so, it’s still the case serious individuals who can afford it will eventually go with a bespoke device. If the penis in question is far larger than average in either or both length and girth, it’s also where you have to start since you can get away with locking a 4″ penis in a device designed for 5-6″ but you can’t lock a 7.5″ monster in one. In any event, even if you go custom, bigger dicks have other complications. A larger erection requires a larger device which is harder to conceal in normal street clothing, besides being heavier.

Below average penises in both length and girth are better candidates for enforced chastity. There are more off the shelf options for them than larger ones and, when locked in an appropriately-sized device, they’re easier to conceal amongst the muggles. The penis on me is both a little shorter and a little less girthy than average (5.625″/14.29 cm long, 4.75″/12 cm around) so finding a device for me is pretty easy and the resulting bulge isn’t ridiculously over-sized.

Cut

One of the more common questions I get is about chastity hygiene for guys with foreskins. I do not have a foreskin since my parents decided to have that removed when I far too young to have a say in it and my position is no little baby boy should be circumcised until or unless he decides to do it or it’s a medical necessity.

That being said, the positive side-effect of my being cut is a simplified life while locked in a device. Since I have no extra layers of skin and the resulting nooks and crannies that come along with it, I can become very clean without having to remove the device. From what I understand, that’s more of a problem for natural guys since the foreskin is in the exact place it’s most important a device secures and is therefore more difficult to access. To maintain a healthy level of hygiene, those guys need to be let out far more frequently.

Piercing

Trapped-ball chastity devices are ridiculously easy to escape from. You can add doodads and doohickeys to make it somewhat more complicated, but those are only a bit harder to defeat and can lead to a much more uncomfortable experience (and edema). My advice has been that the device should be seen as a deterrent and anyone so willing to defeat it should probably not be in it to begin with, but our urges are strong and hard to resist, especially over time. Even I have been known to defeat a device, though it was a long time ago.

The only way to make a trapped-ball device inescapable is through a piercing. A lot of men crave inescapability because it makes wearing the device easier by removing temptation plus is just like 287% hotter. Keyholders, too, enjoy the added sense of control (at least mine does). A Prince Albert piercing is the best and most widely supported among various device manufacturers. It’s in most cases a permanent body modification since they are known to be a piercing that doesn’t close consistently (especially when sized to the best gauge for this application). But it does make the penis a foolproof and permanent occupant of its confinement.

The PA when used for chastity security is also best combined with a cut cock. I personally find uncut pierced cocks to be incredibly hot, but for the purpose of security, it would only serve to make more complicated the entire situation.

Conclusion

A smaller/thinner than average, circumcised, and pierced penis is the best candidate for enforced male chastity. As I said above, if you’re not one or more of those things, it’s still very much possible to “enjoy” enforced chastity. None of these things are required. But if you’re already one or two of them (that are controllable) and feel that chastity is such an important part of your life and relationship that you’re willing to go the extra mile, the trifecta will result in a very satisfying experience. Obviously, one cannot control the size of their penis, but the other two things are available options for those sufficiently dedicated to having their sex controlled by a loving keyholder.

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October metrics

IMG_7483I guess I probably should have called this “Locktober metrics” since that little internet thing has been in control of the key all month long. When I mentioned Belle wanted to do Locktober, I said I had no idea where it came from. Since then, a follower on Tumblr sent me a link to a post on a blog called Keep Him Locked: A Wife’s Guide to Male Chastity and Cock Cages that might be the origination of the idea, though the original post only has 57 notes and I’d think something that’s become such a big deal would have more than that. In any event, I suppose it’s possible the idea came to multiple people.

So yeah, as I thought, Belle really wanted to let the penis out so I could fuck her with it, but she held steady and kept it locked up. Someone on Twitter called me out for not truly being part of Locktober since I switched devices a few times over the month and I suppose if one wants to consider the few moments of freedom experienced as the penis went from one securement to another violating the rules, that’s one’s choice, though since it was never out for more than a few moments and was never used for anything pleasurable, one could also find other, more productive ways ways to entertain one’s pedantic self and leave me out of it.

As you can see from the numbers above, and for the first time this year, the penis was locked up 100% of the time. Zero time out, zero times inside Belle, zero ruined orgasms. And, of course, zero actual orgasms. That makes that part of the metrics easy to report.

As you might recall, September was the month the penis was unsecured the most all year by a long shot. So much so that the cumulative time out jumped from about 1% through August to about 3% though September. Locktober brought that back down to about 2%.

Due to how our schedules interacted, Locktober was actually way longer than a month. The last time I was allowed into Belle was back on September 10 and the penis has been locked up continuously since September 19. So that’s 43 days of lock-up and 52 days without pleasurable usage of the meat. My last orgasm was August 26.

I’m not sure I’ve ever been locked up for so long. There were some really intense urges to be out that were their most acute in the moments right after she came. I’ve also felt some incredibly powerful and notable waves of craving freedom at some points when looking at Tumblr. I don’t crave orgasm at all, though. Just…something. Some kind of friction against the penis. Something more than the feeling of its hard confinement pushing back.

Belle came nine times in October. The month started with a bang but then life got in the way and we had to make a trip and share a hotel room with offspring and that put a damper on getting her off. One of those orgasms she gave herself. The remaining were inflicted by me using my fingers, though one was a team effort in which she used the vibrator while I fingered her. That was a particularly compelling orgasm, as I recall, and the second of the day(!).

November, of course, is NOvember but that’s a thing dealing with orgasm denial, not continuous enforced chastity, and a lot easier for her to accommodate if she chooses to do so. I’m in no hurry to come anyway and can be denied that while still giving her the occasional (if all too brief) fucking she craves.

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Micro chastity: A review

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I’ve been wearing chastity devices for almost exactly nine years. I’ve worn plastic ones and metal ones, those with and without rings, some wrought from cold metal and another 3D printed. I’ve kind of lost count, to be honest. It’s well over a dozen different devices. Perhaps even over sixteen.

I don’t say all that to boast. There are men out there who’ve been in a greater variety of devices for longer than me, for sure. My point is, I thought I kind of knew some things about the mechanics of being locked up. Like how to measure for a device and how to size it. How to wear it every day and live in it. But the other day, a crazy little thing landed on my desk from far away. And after nine years, more or less everything I knew got turned on its head.

Continue reading “Micro chastity: A review”

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Mailbag

CR from Deutschland said:

I’m following your blog for I think several years now. There a quite a few male chastity blogs on the web, but yours is the best.

As I read your last post, better to say the one that’s linked in the comments (“Tent me“), I really thought “This is so me”!. I’m also caged by (or is it for?) my partner for about 1.5 years now, wearing the cage almost all the time. It’s not that she is very enthusiastic in denying my orgasms (although I would really like that), it’s more that she enjoys controlling my sexuality and my orgasm. I get to cum quite often, but only when she unlocks me. Like you, I know where the key is, but I won’t ever take it to jerk off or for anything else, without asking her and most of the time I really don’t feel the urge to do so. What also reminded me of myself was, as you wrote about that strange feeling being unattended, not in the cage. For me, it happens sometimes, mostly when life get’s in the way and I don’t have the chance to lock back up after we have sex. Most of the time, I manage to lock up after a few hours, but sometimes it happens that I’m remaining unlocked for days. But I’m not satisfied with this, as I know that she expects me being locked up and for myself I don’t want it to be other than that. So I texted her about this, after I read your post, telling her that I have to improve with this and encouraged her, to tell me to lock up immediately after sex more often.

Although I think, you’re getting feedback like this quite often, I really wanted to write you my thoughts about this. Feel free to answer if you like, I really would appreciate this!

This is great for a couple of reasons. One, there is no One True Way™ to do male chastity. The important thing is to find a way that works for everyone. The one being locked probably has a very good idea of exactly how they want to be locked, but the one holding the key needs to be able to find the way to do it that makes them most comfortable and that they can feel ownership over.

Two, struggling with being unattended and living with a vagueness as to expectations. I found after Belle added the rule that I would always be locked absent a very good reason or permission from her, it made me a much more contented bunny. My submissive side never had to worry about un-submissive thoughts rationalizing bad behavior since there was A RULE and the kind of sub I am adores enforced rules. This particular rule came about as a result of bad behavior on my part, but I think has made our dynamic better and has left me more satisfied as a submissive.

Finally, communication. “I texted her about this.” Yes. We need to remember our partners are not mind-readers. Hopefully she took your feedback under consideration.

Some John asked:

Do you have any idea how to get into a Steelworxx securo cage? It uses the same PA mechanism as the schandmaske but like spending 40 minutes poking through the PA hole trying to find the screw part without pinching the urethra was really frustrating

Yeah, it can be a bitch to get those kinds of tubes on. I have no secret other than fishing the PA bar around until it gets home. The Securo wand looks harder to get into place than the Schandmaske if only because the Schandmaske was a curved single unit and the Securo wand is two pieces and you need to line up the hole on the bar with the part the screws into it. Perhaps you can get a lock like on the Securo 01? It’d be easier to get in, that’s for sure.

Pat asked:

Hi, I finally took the plunge and got my PA done at an 8ga on the 16th and I could not be more happy with it. My question is when I’m healed what won’t you stretch to and I’m looking at the Steelwerks chastity cages for my fist one to use with my PA when it’s healed. What would your recommend from them ? I have a HTV2 and I never really liked it because it was a pain to keep clean. I really like the curves barbell Steelwerks made for you. I’m having to teach my self how to pee and it’s not easy lol.

Peeing with a PA is a problem except when it’s a PA inside a solid tube like the Steelheart’s. Then it’s nothing at all.

If you’re looking at Steelwerks from Montreal, Chris will make anything your heart desires. You and he can correspond and talk it all through. If access for cleaning is a priority, he’ll take care of you. He has a lot of models on his site, but honestly, I’d view them more as idea starters than anything else. Steelwerks is the definition of bespoke. The Savile Row tailor of male chastity.

Now, if you meant Steelworxx, the maker of the Steelheart, that’s another matter. The Looker 02 is a peach of a device and very easy to keep clean (though the insert does tend to hold on to urine perhaps more than you’ll be happy with — maybe think about the Looker 03). Dietmar will also make pretty much whatever you want, but the language barrier is a bit more of a challenge and his customer service can sometimes leave something to be desired. His “Tube Jacket” models might be good for you, too, but I’ve never worn them and can’t vouch for their wearability.

Lori of Lori Tube fame left me a comment saying they also produce devices secured by PA hooks and pioneered the type of device. That’s true, they’ve been making PA-fixed devices forever (I recall seeing them before I knew what a PA was and wondering how they worked). However, I’ve never worn one of their devices and have no personal experience ordering from them.

A dude called Bear left a lengthy (one might even say girthy) comment. Here are the salient points…

I know plastic is off your radar and I understand why. However, there are a couple minor updates re HTv2 you may want to incorporate into your review of same, for guys like me who are doing research. So, you wrote your review of v1, then did v2 from a here’s what’s different POV. I don’t know if these things weren’t available at that time, or if you missed them, or if you did include them but I missed it in your post. If the later, I apologize. It’s available in a fourth color, pink. Not for me, but there you have it.

Also, there is a fourth ring available–36mm. So, you can get the HTv2 with rings of 36, 40, 45, 50. I think that lines up pretty well with the options offered by CBxK.

I don’t believe pink was available when I bought it or I would have said so. Also can’t recall a fourth ring size. I assume it was just three since that’s all I remember. Man, 36mm is small.

Also, I know you say nothing is totally secure without a piercing. I respect that and I have no doubt you’re correct, but I’m very much not in a place where I’m ready to do that. Do you happen to know anything about the guardian ring KFH is offering for use with HTv2? There’s one review of it on their site and the guy claims it makes it inescapable. Wondered if you’d heard anything or had any personal experience. I’m most likely gonna buy it, only 17 bucks anyway. I was thinking pretty seriously about signing up so I could login on your blog anyway. Once I’ve tried this guardian, I’ll put my thoughts about it in a comment under your review.

I’ve never used that specific device but have experience with similar types. Those doodads are not equivalent to being held in place by a PA, but they are an added layer of deterrence for guys who either need it or like the feeling of it being there. I personally don’t like the added bulk and complication they introduce and wonder if the flexible material used is non-porous or if it’ll harbor bacteria (which would make odor more of a problem).

In any event, a motivated guy could still without a lot of effort back out of an HT2 sporting that thing, do their business, then work their way back in (stocking method, anyone?).

Speaking of KFH (lol), have you ever had any problems with them? Do you trust them? I don’t buy stuff online. Maybe three times I have. I got trust issues, whatever. Anyways, I’m wary of giving KFH my personal info. (I don’t really understand why last name is a required field there when I’m using PayPal, but that’s not really what you’re here for. They obviously need my address, so they could find my name easy enough if they wanted to.) point is: are they trustworthy?!!?

I’ve bough a few things from them without any issue. I trust them as much as anyone online. Personally, I don’t lose a lot of sleep over giving my card info away online and certainly have not been worried about identity issues with them. The few times I’ve used them, they were discreet.

Okay, complete change of subject, and we’re almost done I promise. I have major moral/ethical/QA, QC issues with fake and forged goods. Seems like I’d be preaching to the choir with you about that, so I won’t go barking up that tree. But I want to say this. There were some comments on your review of the “HTv2 metal” by people talking about grinding and drilling on them. I’m not an alarmist, but it’s worth mentioning that EVERYTHING that comes out of China has lead in it. Having things around the house that contain lead, and handling them, is not a problem. Everything made of brass contains some lead, for example; find me a house with no brass in it. However, if an alloy containing lead is going to abrade your skin badly, or if you’re going to grind it into a dust which will inevitably become airborne, you now risk getting it into the bloodstream. It’s extremely unlikely that this would pose a problem if you’re just grinding one, for yourself. But I felt I had to say something.

Those are good points and something I think I touched on in not so many words in the review. It bothers me they don’t specify the “metal” used in the device’s construction. I don’t know if “everything” from China has lead in it, but I certainly don’t trust something that’s too cheap and where materials aren’t well-specified.

Probably because I’m a creative professional myself, but the idea that someone would be OK buying a cheap, potentially harmful knock-off in order to save some money rather than buying from a source that actually cares about their clients’ well-being after they’ve invested who knows how long designing and developing a product is really a problem. I’d rather support creators and not moochers.

And the mailbag is now empty!