Chastity Nerdery – Page 30

June 4, 2009

Berry tickling

Typical of my nocturnal activity when Belle’s away, last night I surfed a little chastity porn (and was just as discouraged and depressed and disappointed as I usually am), checked out a couple blog posts, and otherwise dicked around on the web looking at things like the search results that lead people to this blog.

For those interested, the number one term is the supremely unimaginative “denying thumper“. Happily, I rank first on that one. Then, there’s a number of variations (still) on the Birdlock chastity device. The reviews are in, people. It’s not all that and a bag of chips. Move on. Then, there’s a whole bunch of others you might expect, including “CB-6000”, “ruined orgasm”, “orgasm denial”, etc., etc. While exploring some of the unique variations, I stumbled upon a page I haven’t seen in quite some time.

The second website I ever visited looking for information about enforced chastity and orgasm denial was Tickleberry, and I’m very glad I found it so soon¹ . It’s a veritable wealth of info for the chastity-curious. The page I found (again) last night is called “Wearing a chastity device: How does it feel?” Six or eight months in, I find myself nodding in agreement at most of what they say.

Physically the first thing you notice when you wear a chastity device is that it adds some extra weight to your penis. This can seem a little unusual at first. Not painful, just different.

It also means that your penis is pulled downwards a little more than normal. After a while it can feel very comfortable, once you’ve got used to wearing it you’ll soon come to enjoy the physical sensations of your confinement, even the beginnings of an erection will remind you of your loving keyholder.

Some men who are used to long term lock up actually feel “naked” without their chastity device.

The CB6K isn’t all that heavy, really, but I’m sure the metal cages they sell are. In truth, I’d love to be lugging a heavy steel cage around, but I’m stuck with the polycarbonate for now. And no, once it’s properly fitted and lubricated, there’s not much pain over the course of the day. There is some pain, but some of us also kind of dig that. At this point, wearing the device about half the time, I agree that’s it very comfortable. It’s surprising how quickly one can adjust to wearing something so foreign and weird in such a tender, confined space, but I have. There are times I totally forget I’m wearing it. And yes, I do find myself enjoying the confinement. I also enjoy not being confined, but agree that not wearing it does feel stranger to me now than going commando (at least for a period of time immediately following an extended lock-up).

Once you’ve become accustomed to wearing a chastity device at times it will feel as if the cage of the chastity device is “caressing” your penis.

I have never, ever felt like the device was “caressing” the penis. Not once.

The beginnings of an erection will feel more like a nice “erotic pain” rather than being unbearably painful.

I have grown to adore the sensation of being aroused and hard while wearing the device. It does hurt, but not as much as it did when I first started, and it’s fantastic.

Does a Chastity Device Prevent Erections? Strictly speaking – No.

No, no, NO! Not just strictly. This is a big pet peeve of mine where people on blogs or community sites or in porn will suggest enforced chastity prevents erections. It does NOT. Now, after a while, I will say I think the confinement reduces the number of erections one would have normally (which, I think, is the result of the body being trained not to waste the energy since nothing will come of it), but you will still get hard when stimulated sufficiently and nothing at all short of a medical condition will keep you from getting hard at night.

Wearing a chastity device and having less orgasms means over time it’s possible that you will mentally tune in more to other erogenous zones; such as your neck, your nipples, your ears, your balls, and perhaps your anus. Through Chastity and orgasm denial you may become a more tender, more considerate, more sensitive and a more passionate lover. Gaining a better appreciation that your cock isn’t absolutely necessary for good sex. You learn to enjoy the pleasures of your own body without orgasm or direct touch to your penis. You become a better lover by discovering new ways to arouse and excite the body of your Mistress, and overall you discover that your pleasure is to be found in your Wife’s pleasure. Pleasing and pleasuring your Goddess is your reward – a reward that may earn you release and even orgasm.

Oh, fucking hell, yes. The penis is in no way necessary for a satisfying, intense, and passionate sex life. As a recent letter to Dan Savage points out (third one down), removing penetration from the picture can result in some hot monkey sex. I agree with every single word in the above paragraph (excepting the whole “goddess” thing, perhaps).

At the beginning of the year, Belle and I agreed (via our Covenant) that she’d lock me up 50% of the time. That’s 183 days out of 2009. To remain on schedule, that means I’d need to be locked up 78 days so far this year. In fact, after doing the math last night, I find I’ve been confined for 77 days in total (with the longest stretch being the last one at 18 days). I would have guessed I was in more than 77 days, but I’m glad we’re so close to the goal.

To be honest, and at least for me, I’ve found the entire experience of enforced chastity so rewarding (not only for me, but for Belle, too), that I think 50% should be viewed not as a goal, but a minimum requirement.

—

¹ Though I still often wonder, which/what “berry” is being tickled, and who is tickling it?↩

May 19, 2009

Easy access

Reader ritemate left the following comment to the post Tube Talk:

One thing I don’t understand: How are you able to switch rings when you’re locked? Shouldn’t Belle keep the keys?

To which I replied that Belle doesn’t hide the key or keep it with her. It hangs on its chain with the rest of her necklaces. I let myself out about once a week for cleaning and general maintenance and lock myself back up, usually in the morning after she’s gone to work. This has never seemed to bother either of us since the device is just a symbol of her control over the cock. The actual control is between my ears.

But ritemate’s question has been lingering in my mind. I assumed, since Belle doesn’t like to wear the key all the time (regardless of how hot I find it), that it was only natural that she’d keep it with her other jewelry. And, since my intentions were pure, it was OK that I occasionally let myself out without her specific knowledge, as long as I had a reason.

But here we are three weeks and a day following my last orgasm (a new record) and two weeks and a day since the start of my lock-up (the longest period this year) and I heard myself thinking this morning that maybe I needed to get out after Belle left so I could…could…well, just because. Because I could shave, clean, etc., but also so I could simply touch myself. Wouldn’t that feel nice? Just for a bit. Then, right back in. Yes, my precious. That’s right. Nasty dommeses wouldn’t mind. You have a right to touch the cock, don’t you, precioussss….?

Yikes.

So, before she left, I asked Belle to hide the key. Now I have no idea where it is and there’s no way for me to get out of the device absent real, honest cheating. And you know what? The whole thing just got about 14% hotter for me. Now I will only get out when she consciously decides I will. No more sneaking around behind the Hobb– er, I mean, Belle’s back taking advantage of a vague technicality. In actual fact, there’s no real reason I have to get out, anyway. I can clean very well using the little angled squirt bottle thing I have and can shave well enough around the device. Unless she wants to play with it, she can keep it in there indefinitely at this point.

Now if I can only figure out how to deal with my sudden urge to take a bite out of a live fish…

May 15, 2009

Tube talk

Seems like we’ve been talking a lot about sex and emotions and shit lately. I’m feeling the need to give the chastity nerd inside me a little love…

Remember the hair experiment? I can continue to report that keeping a nice, smooth, hairless area around the ring circumference maintains a significantly more comfortable experience than not. I haven’t had any issues with razor burn or stubble. I shave it every other day or so, always with lubricated skin (soap, shaving cream, or just the silicone lube I use to keep the device moving around easily) and a well-used yet still serviceable razor (learned that lesson the hard way). So far, I give close shaving a thumbs-up.

I’m kind of in a weird area now where the 1 7/8″ A-ring on the CB-6000 is a little too big but the 1 3/4″ ring is a little too small. I can wear the 1 3/4″ ring without issue during the day, but find an annoying amount of testicle pain at night (and not pinching of the scrotum, actual testicular pain from my balls being crushed…wait, don’t I like that?). Also, I find the inevitable erection seems to back up behind the ring and cause more internal discomfort. What I need is a size somewhere in between – the Goldilocks ring – but it doesn’t exist. It continues to surprise me how big an impact such a small relative difference in size makes. In any event, I switched to the 1 3/4″ ring this morning and am going to leave it on for the duration of this stint. It feels more secure than the 1 7/8″ ring, doesn’t hang as low, and in general makes for a smaller feeling package to carry around.

I’m not sure what all the variables are, but I can remember when the 2″ ring was too tight and the 1 7/8″ ring was barely wearable. I know one of the things that changes during wear is skin on the scrotum, so maybe I just need a little more stretching there to fully adjust to the 1 3/4″ ring. The 1 5/8″ ring is insanely small, so at some point, the junk just don’t fit. I cannot imagine ever being able to wear that second-smallest ring, even for a few minutes.

I’ve also started wearing the smallest KSD-G3 all the time now. It does increase security, but I find the ancillary effect of it holding the penis down into the tube to be a bigger benefit for me. It helps with lining the urethral opening up with the slot and, even though I’m unable to pee standing up due to the PA piercing, that helps with cleanliness (which I’m a bit of a nut over). I do find that it occasionally will cause superficial “cuts” that don’t break the skin on the top of the shaft, but so far during this stint, they’ve been nothing I can’t deal with.

Speaking of peeing standing up, I recently acquired an external, “Texas” style condom catheter. Basically, it’s a rubber with a short tube at the end and some sticky stuff on the inside to keep it from leaking or falling off. I haven’t put it on yet, but I’m wondering if that will be my ticket back to vertical peeing. I worry about what keeping it on all the time will do to my skin and I’m also wondering what the hygiene implications are. In any event, I’m thinking of trying it out during my next confinement. Anyone else out there ever play around with one of these?

Finally, I can’t forget to ping Tom’s excellent Birdlock review. It’s a very thorough account of the device from an expert point of view that any enforced chastity fan will appreciate. He basically answered my biggest concern regarding the likelihood one could squish and squash oneself to orgasm while wearing it. Turns out, yes, you can, so my fascination with it is essentially over.

There. I feel better now that I’ve gotten all that chastity nerdery off my chest. Our regular programming will resume shortly.

May 7, 2009

Cock shots

In the spirit of my recent rant about dudes posting shots of their cocks locked in CB-x000 devices, I offer you, my faithful readers, the following.

cock_shots

Unfortunately, I don’t have the guts to post these shots sans pants (unlike Tom, nobody’s asked me to anyway). In the least, I imagine they can be used as educational examples of how one looks while packing plastic. The one on the left was taken during my flight home yesterday and the one of the right today while sitting in a four hour meeting (in both cases, I was discrete – nobody saw me take them).

What do you think? A little obvious?

As I’ve posted before, I’ve kinda gotten over worrying if people notice my queer bulge. I’m not going out of my way to show it off, but as you can see, there’s only so much I can do hide it. I’ve tried aligning it with the center seam of my pants, but that looks just as weird since the tip of the CB6K’s tube is somewhat pointed and the seam will usually fit right into the tube’s slot. Nice thing about our sex averse society is no one’s likely to ask me about it even if they do think there’s something weird going on down there.

Quick update on the hair management front: I can report after four days that I have none of the usual issues with skin irritation and pain around the A ring and no razor burn or other issues due to shaving. I’m being very careful to lubricate my skin before removing the stubble each morning and have found much of what I used to assume was skin getting pinched in the seams of the A ring was actually hair getting stuck and pulled. This may be the most comfortable I’ve been while in the device so far, even after days like today when I was sitting at various conference tables pretty much nonstop all day. Color me very happy with my Friar Tuck pube-do.

May 5, 2009

Hair

poster2 One of the things that bugs me about the CB-6000 is the joints between the ring parts and how they very neatly grab and pull pubic hair. I find myself sitting a lot in my job and, depending on how tight my underwear or pants are, my pubes will get caught and pulled hard enough to hurt like fuck but not hard enough to actually pull them out (which is good, I guess).

Debate on this subject is varied. Maymay says trim, don’t shave. I’ve also read on Aarkey’s FAQ that some prefer to keep it long. I can’t stand long, untrimmed pubes, so that’s out. Normally, I keep them about as long as Maymay suggests (around a centimeter), but that’s how I’m also finding myself getting caught. So, for this stint in the device, I decided to NOT follow Maymay’s advice and try a method I’ve seen a few men use via their obligatory online chastity shots.¹

Basically, what I’ve done is shave an area about an inch wide all the way around the ring of the CB6K. I didn’t really start out going for an inch, but I kept trying to make it even and eventually just found myself there (yet another piece of advice from Seinfeld that I ignored). After a whole day in grown-up pants and my tightest underwear, I can report that I had NO discomfort around the top part of the ring at all. Normally, I’d be pretty sore up there and even red and irritated, but not today. Smooth as a baby’s butt and no pulling. I’ll have to see how it goes as it starts to grow out. Maymay warns of irritation as the ring interacts with the new hair and the shaving necessary to maintain it. If it all goes horribly wrong, I’ll come back here and tell you all about it.

Regardless, I’m not letting my pubes get bushy, I don’t care how bad it hurts when packing the plastic.

¹ BTW, WTF is up with that? Does every guy in chastity think I or anyone wants to see yet another goddamned schlong locked up in a CB-x000? Seriously, the web is littered with these things. If you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all (but I do award bonus points for the guys in pink lacy underwear, stockings, or any type of French maid’s dress). And, oh by the way, I see one every fucking day on me. And yeah, I know, I use a variation on the theme up there in this site’s header, but the composition is very different. Personally, I’d much rather see guys in full belts or steel trapped-ball devices or anything exotic and stainless over one more pink sausage squished into a polycarbonate tube. Then again, had they not posted those shots I’d never had seen their hair management technique. So yeah, OK. Shutting up.

April 9, 2009

No guilt zone

Elle, over on Kink Unleashed, seems to be wrestling with something I suspect my Belle also has issues with. Specifically, is it OK to use enforced chastity to make a man act more attentive, affectionate, etc.? Is that manipulative? Is it fair? Feel free to read her post for yourself, but that’s my take on what she was getting at. I left some comments over there that I’d like to expand and extend here.

Right up front I’ll say, yes, I think it’s fair. More than fair. Assuming the underlying relationship is good – that the chastity isn’t being used to “fix” something – and the D/s layer of the stack is humming along, then I say any weapon in the arsenal of the dominant is in play in order to provoke a certain response in the sub. I’d go so far as to say the submissive would welcome being “manipulated” by their dom in such a way. I don’t want Belle to feel any guilt for using whatever power she has over me to in order to make her life a little closer to what she wants or needs it to be. As a matter of fact, I like that kind of shit.

Secondly, Elle seems to suggest (and I know Belle has similar thoughts) that it shouldn’t be necessary to lock up a cock to make a man a better mate. Well, OK, but I think about it this way: Remember back at the beginning of the relationship when everything was new and the guy was super sweet and affectionate and yada yada and all the sex was awesome? From my perspective as a chastised man, all chastity does is recreate the emotional and hormonal atmosphere from those heady, intense days of discovery. No fucking kidding, I have always loved Belle and always will, but what I feel for her now is just as potent and amazing as what I felt when we first started seeing each other. Just as potent, and just as real. Chastising me and denying me and constantly keeping me on an ever-upward spiral of sexual frustration does not create feelings that don’t already exist within me, it amplifies and magnifies and feeds them back on themselves until they consume my mind – just like when I first met and fell in love with her.

And guess what? I like it! I want to feel that way about her. I want my heart to race and the meat between my legs to swell at the slightest of her touches. I want to linger on every kiss. I want the memory of her smell to cause me to daydream about that little spot under her hair, behind her ear, that I love to nibble on. I want to be waiting on her every need and looking for any way I can score points with her. And, I suspect, she likes that, too. As Elle said, what girl doesn’t want an attentive lover? There isn’t one little bit of that attentiveness that is in any way made less genuine just because it’s instigated by a chunk of polycarbonate locked onto a dude’s cock.

I could go on, but Belle’s told me she’d like me to clean the kitchen and make her coffee for the morning. After that, I know there’s a load of laundry downstairs that needs to be folded. Daylight’s wasting.

April 7, 2009

Dreaming of steel

The San Quentin of trapped-ball chastity devices

My severe horniness combined with my dopey sleepiness has left me fairly unproductive today. Surfing through my collection of chastity and denial sites finds me again and again at the Steelworxx website. Why? Because, for the 124th time, I’m pricing out the stainless beauty to the right.

For the record, I want the Steelheart, sized about the same as my CB-6000, with an integrated lock and PA fixing. That’ll set me back €296…which, I think, is something like Monopoly money. I’m not sure. Oh, I see. According to Google, at this moment in time, €296 equals $393. That’s a lot of cabbage.

I like the Steelheart for a few reasons. One, it’s designed using a simple aesthetic; natural curve, super-clean lines, and a single hole for urination. IMO, so much more beautiful than the CB6K’s logic-puzzlesque look. Two, I have a well-known fetish for stainless steel. Three, I like that when it’s worn it doesn’t appear to cover the penis as much as it appears to have replaced it with a shiny steel prosthetic. At least in a CB6K you can still be connected with Mr. Winky through the convenient visitor’s window-like plastic. With the Steelheart, your little man is doing hard time in solitary. Über. Fucking. Hot. (I’ve been doing that period-between-each-word thing a lot lately, haven’t I?) Finally, with the added option of an integrated lock, the entire package ends up being less bulky than the CB6K by a long shot. I’d also imagine it would be more comfortable for Belle when I spoon (and, occasionally, grind) into her.

The reviews (here, here, here, here, oh hell, just search Google) all seem to be universally positive. Now if I can only talk Belle into getting it for me. Hey, father’s day is coming up! What says to dad how much you love him better than a stainless steel cock prison!?

April 7, 2009

PA cable project est morte

I put a bullet in the head of the brief-yet-storied PA cable project this morning. I cut the fucker off as soon as I got out of bed. At least for how I’m configured, I can’t see any way a cable through my PA ring will ever work as a permanent security measure. It’s just too painful, in the supernotsexy way. Either the ring is pulling on the piercing or the cable itself is poking into the spongy tissue of the penis head or pinching my scrotum or whatever. Maybe if you’re the kind of guy who’s flaccid state is on the longer side (a shower rather than a grower), it’d work. But if you’re like me and often see the resting version of your little buddy only filling about 60% of the CB6K tube, I think it’s a no go.

Belle unlocked me before she left for work so I could install the smaller A ring and the KSD-G3. I took the opportunity to clean myself and the device, shave, etc. As I withdrew the penis from the tube, I saw gobs of clear, thick fluid. And it just kept coming. I was careful not to handle the merchandise any more than necessary (I didn’t even get an erection), but the precum just kept leaking and leaking. I don’t know – maybe a tablespoon? It was crazy. Even now, 90 minutes later, I can feel little burps of the stuff oozing out every once in a while. So, uh, yeah. I’d say I’m pretty focused at the moment.

Anyway, I’m way over trying to wire the device to myself and am now content with having a pretty secure device as opposed to a totally secure one.

April 6, 2009

Rewired

I won’t be trying anything for at least a week, though. Even if I’m not dealing with little cuts and it’s only abraded and raw, I need time to heal.

A week? A whole week? Nah. How about a day. Max.

I was soaking in the bath yesterday and realized, since I’m wearing the 1 7/8″ ring, that I could slip the tube off without hardly trying. Before, I would have shrugged it off, but now that I’ve had a taste of stainless steel enforced security, it’s totally unacceptable. You might be asking yourself what I’m going to do about it since I can’t unlock the thing. Turns out, you can wire yourself up pretty easily, even when locked, assuming you’re fabricating the cable at the same time.

The first approach I took was to loop the cable around the PA ring directly and then (a la Birdlock) loop it under my balls onto the CB6K’s ring. I figured the cable could be shorter that way and might even move around easier. Unfortunately, it was pretty uncomfortable. The cable around the cock ring kept pinching my scrotum skin. My second approach was to affix a permanent loop around the PA ring and another around the padlock. I figure this would greatly reduce the amount of wire I was carrying around in my crotch. This was what I slept with last night.

Well, tried to sleep with. I need Belle back in bed with me. Somehow, when she’s there and I can hold her, I fall asleep easier than if she’s not. This seems counter-intuitive to me, but it is what it is. Without her there, I’m just too damned horny to drift off. The sex lizard in my subconscious keeps interjecting erotic thoughts into my brain as I lay there. That causes the tube to fill which in turn reminds me of my status and what I can’t do about it. The engorgement subsides after a few minutes, but I find myself wanting to feel it again as soon as it’s gone. I think I finally fell asleep around 1:00 AM.

At 4:00, the cable woke me up. The aluminum ferrule had ridden up into the tube and was pinching me when I was hard. In fact, the fixed hoop’s inflexibility and the close proximity of the ferrule to sensitive meat is the downfall of that particular design. Once awake, the aforementioned subconscious lizard kept me up for the rest of the night.

Now, I’m back to the original design but with a slightly longer cable. So far, so good. Haven’t felt any pulling or other pain. The cable does form a bit of a hard point where it’s bent around the PA ring and that does occasionally poke the part of the head of the cock between the PA hole and urethral opening, but it’s manageable so far.

In other chastity nerdery news, I’m somewhat amazed at how my scrotum has adjusted to the device. For the longest time, it would be stretched tight, especially at night. But now, even when engorged, I find a noticeable amount of loose skin. Overall comfort has increase dramatically. I may have finally and fully “outgrown” the 1 7/8″ ring.

Be sure to check back later for another exciting entry in Thumper’s PA cable saga.

April 5, 2009

Unwired

I cut the wire off. The pain was getting worse and more frequent so I didn’t really have much choice. I’m pretty sure I know what happened, though. I’m currently wearing a 6ga segment ring in my PA instead of my old 8ga captive ball ring. The segment ring, when assembled, looks like a continuous and (mostly) smooth ring. In the case of mine (and maybe all of them) there remains a very small gap between the segment and the ring into which it snaps. While the ring is in, it rotates freely through the piercing. Sometimes the segment disappears into the head of the cock, sometimes it’s visible.

Well, what I think happened was that the gap between the segment and the ring, when rotated into the head of the dick, was being pulled against the incredibly sensitive tissue in there when the shaft was trying to retract. The edges of the ring are actually pretty sharp (sharper than they appear in the picture). I wasn’t being pinched as much as I was getting cut. Owie. So anyway, the wire’s off and I haven’t felt anything except during the night and this morning when I was fully engorged (“erect” doesn’t seem like the right word). Well see how the day goes. Belle (and the key) gets back Monday night. If I feel like I need to remove the ring, I’ll need to stage a breakout from the CB6K. I really have no idea if I can get the entire thing off when it’s locked. Hopefully, I won’t need to find out.

In the future, I’ll either need to make the wire a little longer so it doesn’t pull at all or I’ll need to get a 6ga captive ball ring. On the one hand, it won’t have any exposed sharp edges like the segment does, but on the other hand, the ball will keep everything from moving as freely and will eat up just that much more internal volume from the tube (which already gets a little crowded). I won’t be trying anything for at least a week, though. Even if I’m not dealing with little cuts and it’s only abraded and raw, I need time to heal.